So long...?
I wonder how many people are still reading this in this space. I haven't run out of things to say, but I haven't said them all, mainly because of who may still be reading. (Though I'm not sure how it could possibly make things any worse at this point.)
Point is, I'm wondering if I've outgrown this space and should start looking for a new place for my thoughts that run longer than 140 characters. I've been weighing my separation endgame from this journal for a while; I don't want it to die and disappear, because these archives will be useful to someone someday (even if that someone is only me).
I've also been weighing how to move on, with or without you, dear unknown quantity of readers. So let's say this: leave a comment if you want me to let you know about my future long-form writings. I need to get back into practice; I have several lengthy papers due this semester, and I can't see writing disappearing from my skill set once I get a job.
Is something bringing this about now? Well, yes. Can I explain it all here, openly? Not like I want.
Let's put it this way. I feel...somewhat placeless right now. There's a sense of abandonment, either on my part or on my hometown's part, but something just doesn't feel right anymore. It's like I could be almost anywhere in the Philadelphia area, and as long as my family was there, it wouldn't feel very different than it does now.
It's ironic that I feel this now because I have successfully joined a regular outside social activity; however, I feel like I would have found something similar anywhere I was, and will have to again once I move out (read: in the next 18 months).
This is especially bad for me as an aspiring planner who is trying to learn how to shape communities that have a sense of belonging for their residents. Instead, I feel...lost. It's disconcerting, disorienting, saddening, maddening. But most of all, it's a signal for change and a potential learning opportunity.
So there you have it. I may not leave anytime soon, but I'm definitely closer to relocating than I have been in many years. I probably wouldn't abandon the account; the LJ friends' page link has been a mainstay in my bookmark bar since this place opened up. But I think it's time to start writing again somewhere with a little less...baggage.
Enjoy the snow later today and Wednesday. I'm hoping for a snow day tomorrow.