Why Your Love Interest Sucks
Ladies and Gentleman it is time for me to explain to those writers of horrible, horrible, horrible YA romances why your male love interest sucks ass in three short and simple points.
You are very welcome.
1) You have misunderstood every classical romance novel...EVER
Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights and especially Pride and Prejudice are the obvious victims of this. Many of you claim to be inspired by them, but obviously have failed to look beyond the text and truly understand what it was trying to say! Others of you have obviously only seen this monstrosity:
If that "movie adaptation" was your only introduction to P&P then may the gods have mercy on your soul.
You have taken the romance between Mr. Darcy and Lizzie, Mr. Rochester and Jane and so-on-and-so-forth and diluted them into the basic cliches that make it easy to wrap your minds around it.
When Mr. Darcy was being a standoffish dick to Lizzie she did not stalk him (Bella), she did not pine after him (Luce) and she certainly did not loose sleep over his dismissal of her (like all those other basic bitches). Just because Darcy was rich and attractive she was not willing to sacrifice her SELF-R.E.S.P.E.C.T! Because when a man treats you like shit, you should respond as such:
Also remember that other than Bingley's super-desperate sister, girls were not fangirling for Darcy's man-meat because no one want to date a douche! Any girl with dignity anyway. It was that dignity that attracted Darcy to Liz in the first place. Also, let us not forget that Liz REJECTED Darcy because he treated her poorly.
Jane Eyre is quite similar in that respect, although I feel those inspired by it enjoy forgetting that he locked his wife up for going crazy.
But, besides the poor misinterpretations of romance what some of you YA writers fail to realize is that these classical books were not just romance novel. They were social commentary on class, gender bias and the complex relationships between men and women. By only taking the bare-bones of the books (the romantic element) you have missed out on what these books are trying to say.
2) Wet dreams are not characters
While not all of us were ready to rip our bodices from our heaving bussom at the sight of Mr. Darcy's throbbing calves, there is no denying the appeal of these men. After all, when it comes down to it who doesn't want a partner with intellect, looks and money? Gold digging is really simply business management for anyone who understand what marriage was made for...but that's another topic.
Point is that while on the surface Darcy and Rochester seem like the idea hubby, they have issues that keep them from finding their own happiness. That is what makes them dynamic characters. Their lives are filled with daily challenges and expectations, some they cannot meet and others they constantly struggle with.
Brooding constantly and complaining about the difficulties of abstinence only existence doth not make a three-dimentional lead.
When your parents have been gunned down in front of you after watching Zoro, mentally scaring you into the anal part of development for life, then we can talk.
Men in the modern romantic settings are both unrealistic and glorified sexual playthings. Often we talk about the objectification of women in society and while it is certainly an issue, it is imperative that we show men to not simply be our sexual companions around to save us from everything. One, because it isn't fair to our boys and two, why teach that when the reality is so much harsher.
3. Overprotective Dominance, Hyper-Masculinity and just good ol' Douche-baggery.
Now I love men. Men with passion, who know what they want and good after it. Men who are not afraid to be intimate with you. However, there is a fine line between that and having someone drag you out of party because of a little bump-n-grind. Or forcing you to attend prom when you are so upset to go that you cry on the way there. Sneaking into your room when you are sleeping or just follow you around constantly without any warning. Then the apologizes and excuses commence. What's worse is that it often gets dressed up in a sexy package so that anger and sex gets wrapped up in one. Case and point:
Problem with this is simply ABUSE IS ABUSE NO MATTER HOW ATTRACTIVE THE ABUSER!
While this should be obvious to modern women, the current treat of rape-culture in YA lit shows that looks make everything alright. What's even worse is that these overprotective attitudes are defended by the argument "well such and such is only human so they have to be protected."
BULLSHIT!
I am active Anime fan and I love mindless violence so naturally Dragon Ball Z was one of my favorite shows of all time. What was great about it were the characters and the relationships they shared, especially the couples. Chi-Chi and Bulma were both human women married to these super-warrior men, Goku and Vegeta. If a physical match came out between the couples neither the women would be killed in a second, however that never shows in their relationship. Chi-Chi and Bulma, exert themselves as equals in the relationship can actually strike fear into their husbands. So don't tell me that being human means that you have to act subservient to some supernatural male. Strength is not simply measured in the physical.
I wish a vampire would try to control my life, I would stake him so fast he wouldn't even know how to handle it.
----My final point is simply that female writers need to: Stop projecting their wet dreams onto pages and actually develop complex characters. Stop taking stories written in a time where all a woman could do was marry and putting it on the same level as a rom-com. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE! Stop writing male characters who are one step away from a pimp-slap. There is a reason people love bad-boys and it's not because their are bad it is because there is a depth to them. I won't deny it, evil is sexy. However, there is a point where any woman would turn to the guy and go:
"Um, you need to get the fuck out of my house."
Thank You I am going to fantasies about my future husband: Lex Luthor
You are very welcome.
1) You have misunderstood every classical romance novel...EVER
Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights and especially Pride and Prejudice are the obvious victims of this. Many of you claim to be inspired by them, but obviously have failed to look beyond the text and truly understand what it was trying to say! Others of you have obviously only seen this monstrosity:
If that "movie adaptation" was your only introduction to P&P then may the gods have mercy on your soul.
You have taken the romance between Mr. Darcy and Lizzie, Mr. Rochester and Jane and so-on-and-so-forth and diluted them into the basic cliches that make it easy to wrap your minds around it.
When Mr. Darcy was being a standoffish dick to Lizzie she did not stalk him (Bella), she did not pine after him (Luce) and she certainly did not loose sleep over his dismissal of her (like all those other basic bitches). Just because Darcy was rich and attractive she was not willing to sacrifice her SELF-R.E.S.P.E.C.T! Because when a man treats you like shit, you should respond as such:
Also remember that other than Bingley's super-desperate sister, girls were not fangirling for Darcy's man-meat because no one want to date a douche! Any girl with dignity anyway. It was that dignity that attracted Darcy to Liz in the first place. Also, let us not forget that Liz REJECTED Darcy because he treated her poorly.
Jane Eyre is quite similar in that respect, although I feel those inspired by it enjoy forgetting that he locked his wife up for going crazy.
But, besides the poor misinterpretations of romance what some of you YA writers fail to realize is that these classical books were not just romance novel. They were social commentary on class, gender bias and the complex relationships between men and women. By only taking the bare-bones of the books (the romantic element) you have missed out on what these books are trying to say.
2) Wet dreams are not characters
While not all of us were ready to rip our bodices from our heaving bussom at the sight of Mr. Darcy's throbbing calves, there is no denying the appeal of these men. After all, when it comes down to it who doesn't want a partner with intellect, looks and money? Gold digging is really simply business management for anyone who understand what marriage was made for...but that's another topic.
Point is that while on the surface Darcy and Rochester seem like the idea hubby, they have issues that keep them from finding their own happiness. That is what makes them dynamic characters. Their lives are filled with daily challenges and expectations, some they cannot meet and others they constantly struggle with.
Brooding constantly and complaining about the difficulties of abstinence only existence doth not make a three-dimentional lead.
When your parents have been gunned down in front of you after watching Zoro, mentally scaring you into the anal part of development for life, then we can talk.
Men in the modern romantic settings are both unrealistic and glorified sexual playthings. Often we talk about the objectification of women in society and while it is certainly an issue, it is imperative that we show men to not simply be our sexual companions around to save us from everything. One, because it isn't fair to our boys and two, why teach that when the reality is so much harsher.
3. Overprotective Dominance, Hyper-Masculinity and just good ol' Douche-baggery.
Now I love men. Men with passion, who know what they want and good after it. Men who are not afraid to be intimate with you. However, there is a fine line between that and having someone drag you out of party because of a little bump-n-grind. Or forcing you to attend prom when you are so upset to go that you cry on the way there. Sneaking into your room when you are sleeping or just follow you around constantly without any warning. Then the apologizes and excuses commence. What's worse is that it often gets dressed up in a sexy package so that anger and sex gets wrapped up in one. Case and point:
Problem with this is simply ABUSE IS ABUSE NO MATTER HOW ATTRACTIVE THE ABUSER!
While this should be obvious to modern women, the current treat of rape-culture in YA lit shows that looks make everything alright. What's even worse is that these overprotective attitudes are defended by the argument "well such and such is only human so they have to be protected."
BULLSHIT!
I am active Anime fan and I love mindless violence so naturally Dragon Ball Z was one of my favorite shows of all time. What was great about it were the characters and the relationships they shared, especially the couples. Chi-Chi and Bulma were both human women married to these super-warrior men, Goku and Vegeta. If a physical match came out between the couples neither the women would be killed in a second, however that never shows in their relationship. Chi-Chi and Bulma, exert themselves as equals in the relationship can actually strike fear into their husbands. So don't tell me that being human means that you have to act subservient to some supernatural male. Strength is not simply measured in the physical.
I wish a vampire would try to control my life, I would stake him so fast he wouldn't even know how to handle it.
----My final point is simply that female writers need to: Stop projecting their wet dreams onto pages and actually develop complex characters. Stop taking stories written in a time where all a woman could do was marry and putting it on the same level as a rom-com. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE! Stop writing male characters who are one step away from a pimp-slap. There is a reason people love bad-boys and it's not because their are bad it is because there is a depth to them. I won't deny it, evil is sexy. However, there is a point where any woman would turn to the guy and go:
"Um, you need to get the fuck out of my house."
Thank You I am going to fantasies about my future husband: Lex Luthor