Dreams and credit cards
I really did mean to tell my bank about how I was going to be buying plane tickets, it's just that... I bought my tickets, and they didn't call. Then I bought another ticket and again, no problem. But then... As I was trying to buy yet another ticket... Bam, credit card fraud department finally gets a heads up an locks down my card, waiting for me to call them and personally authorize the purchases. Apparently they get a little suspicious when someone tries to buy a bajoillion plane tickets in the space of a few hours. No worries, though. Called up the bank, got everything straighten out, and bought a few more-worrisome tickets early. I didn't want to worry about flying in/out of Greece, especially now that the international rail lines have been closed down for budget reasons. And i was even thinking about railing up to Sofia, Hungary! Alas...
The last few nights I've been having the craziest dreams, all evolving around my future trip. One was of me getting off my plane in Iceland and just knowing that the flight attendants had stolen my luggage. I was very mellow and decided to just buy everyone over again. I don't really remember the other ones very clearly anymore, but for the last few days I've been waking up in a sort of semi-daze. It doesn't help that ive also been having a hard time falling asleep. Insomnia strikes again! Luckily i haven't had to worry about any testing at work so far this week. I'm just trying to keep my head down and last five months without drawing too much attention to myself.
I watched the original videos from the 60's moon walk for the first time today. For all that people are convinced it was a fake, that we dolled up some videos just to beat the Russians, I'm mostly sure that we really did land on the moon. I also watched some of the current International Space Station crew doing a video interview, the lady's hair floating straight up, the three of them ending the show with a weight-less flip. It's pretty amazing to think that right now, a crew of people from different countries are all floating up there, looking down at us, living without gravity, seeing the stars and comets firsthand. I'm not jealous so much as just in sheer awe of these people, whose view of the world is so much wider than my own.
The question keeps coming up to me, what do i really want to do with myself. I want my life to be meaningful. I want to be able to create something outside of myself, to see other hints that we man beings have created, that have transcended our own individual times and cultures to create a lasting impact on our species. I want to learn more about where we're heading, about the future of our technologies and our relationships with each other. I want to be able to feel like what i do on a day-to-day and year-to-year basis is more than just breaking down oxygen into carbon dioxide, more than just digesting foods to keep my organs functioning. I want to have a family, yes, but i also want my experiences that i pass on to my chldren to be rich examples of just how awesome people can be, whether they be stories from my own life or stories that I've learned from others.
i love the job I'm at right now. I love the peopl i work with. There are very cool guys, there are very sharp women, and the community feel of the environment is just the sort of hope-inspiring setting I needed after the navy. It would be so easy to just work here forever. I would never stress about my job. I'd eventually get enough of a raise to be very comfortable in raising a family on my salary alone. It's just that, despite all that, the easiness of the job itself is a huge, looming doom over my possible future satisfaction there. I would get bored. I would be bored and i would get comfortable and i wud stop thinking altogether. It's so eay, it's too easy. I want a job that is challenging with the same type of people that work there. I'm kinda afraid, though, that I'll never find another group just as cool as these people are.
I'm not the sort of person to remain discouraged, though.
The last few nights I've been having the craziest dreams, all evolving around my future trip. One was of me getting off my plane in Iceland and just knowing that the flight attendants had stolen my luggage. I was very mellow and decided to just buy everyone over again. I don't really remember the other ones very clearly anymore, but for the last few days I've been waking up in a sort of semi-daze. It doesn't help that ive also been having a hard time falling asleep. Insomnia strikes again! Luckily i haven't had to worry about any testing at work so far this week. I'm just trying to keep my head down and last five months without drawing too much attention to myself.
I watched the original videos from the 60's moon walk for the first time today. For all that people are convinced it was a fake, that we dolled up some videos just to beat the Russians, I'm mostly sure that we really did land on the moon. I also watched some of the current International Space Station crew doing a video interview, the lady's hair floating straight up, the three of them ending the show with a weight-less flip. It's pretty amazing to think that right now, a crew of people from different countries are all floating up there, looking down at us, living without gravity, seeing the stars and comets firsthand. I'm not jealous so much as just in sheer awe of these people, whose view of the world is so much wider than my own.
The question keeps coming up to me, what do i really want to do with myself. I want my life to be meaningful. I want to be able to create something outside of myself, to see other hints that we man beings have created, that have transcended our own individual times and cultures to create a lasting impact on our species. I want to learn more about where we're heading, about the future of our technologies and our relationships with each other. I want to be able to feel like what i do on a day-to-day and year-to-year basis is more than just breaking down oxygen into carbon dioxide, more than just digesting foods to keep my organs functioning. I want to have a family, yes, but i also want my experiences that i pass on to my chldren to be rich examples of just how awesome people can be, whether they be stories from my own life or stories that I've learned from others.
i love the job I'm at right now. I love the peopl i work with. There are very cool guys, there are very sharp women, and the community feel of the environment is just the sort of hope-inspiring setting I needed after the navy. It would be so easy to just work here forever. I would never stress about my job. I'd eventually get enough of a raise to be very comfortable in raising a family on my salary alone. It's just that, despite all that, the easiness of the job itself is a huge, looming doom over my possible future satisfaction there. I would get bored. I would be bored and i would get comfortable and i wud stop thinking altogether. It's so eay, it's too easy. I want a job that is challenging with the same type of people that work there. I'm kinda afraid, though, that I'll never find another group just as cool as these people are.
I'm not the sort of person to remain discouraged, though.