The good, bad, and depressed
Okay, lots to write about, trying to figure out if I want to go chronological order, or just put them in order of how I feel about writing them...
I'll try chronological... but, be warned, I might skip around a lot.
First up, some light humor...
I'm sitting in the Student Health Center on campus, waiting for the doctor to see me. Next to the waiting they have this projector that's showing an endless Powerpoint presentations that's giving various information about services the center provides, along with occasional health related trivia questions (they'd show several answers, then a little circle would fly out from the side and land on the correct answer.)
At one point a question comes up: "Alcohol affects women differently than men: True False"
And I thought, "True, it makes women more fun to be around!"
Hehe.
Okay, okay, that's bit twisted, but let me explain. In my experience (and I've had two jobs working at crappy hotels with bars in them), men tend to become assmonkeys when they're drunk, women either get all quiet, or tend to be a bit more fun to be around (and not just they're easier to score with) but often are more out-going and friendly (too friendly sometimes, but still.)
I've not adovcating taking advantage of drunk women, btw, just making an observation.
Personally, I never really understood drinking. Anything you have to WORK AT to enjoy, just doesn't make sense to me. I know, I know, you drink long enough they say you get a nice buzz and shit, but to me, beer tastes like crap, and it's just not worth fighting the urge to gag just to get state of inebriation. That's probably why I don't drink coffee either. If I need the caffeine, that's why God invented soda. It's sweet and wakes you up! :)
And don't even get me started on the stupidity of cigarrettes...
Plus there's another reason, I have enough trouble with saying shit that gets me in trouble when I'm SOBER. God only knows what the hell I'd do drunk. Probably reveal a bit more secrets than needs revealing.
But, back to the day at hand..
I saw my doctor (this is the doctor who gives me my depression medcine. You see, I have THREE doctors, my therapists, the guy I see for health reason, and the one who gives me my depression meds.) Anyway, I tell her I think we need to change medicines because I'm having a lot of suicidial thoughts, and getting depressed. She's like, "Well, might I'm not sure if that'll help. All depression medicine is pretty much da same. I don't think it'll do what you're expecting it to."
I countered, "Now, it was helping for awhile, but it just keeps wearing."
And she's like, "Well, it was helping because you were trying something new."
And I go, "Well, no, that's not true, the effexor helped for an entire year, but it started to wear off. The prozac worked for a couple of months, so, that says something should work."
"Oh, well, we can go back on effexor then..."
And I'm thinking, Uh.. not sure you're getting the point here...
Anyway, we talked for a bit more and decided we're going to cut back on my current med and then switch over to yet another pill. She told me that exercise "can do more than any pill" but, I told it's hard to exercise when you're depressed (hell, sometimes exercising makes me depressed.)
(sigh)
Maybe I need to switch doctors.
Course, she also suggested maybe more theraphy was in order. Now, that I could probably agree with. Dunno if my counselor could see me twice a week though, have to ask her about it. As for group, well, last I checked the only group session they had were mainly for domestic violence victims and whatnot.
Shoot.. more to talk about, but I don't feel like writing anymore right now....
I'll try chronological... but, be warned, I might skip around a lot.
First up, some light humor...
I'm sitting in the Student Health Center on campus, waiting for the doctor to see me. Next to the waiting they have this projector that's showing an endless Powerpoint presentations that's giving various information about services the center provides, along with occasional health related trivia questions (they'd show several answers, then a little circle would fly out from the side and land on the correct answer.)
At one point a question comes up: "Alcohol affects women differently than men: True False"
And I thought, "True, it makes women more fun to be around!"
Hehe.
Okay, okay, that's bit twisted, but let me explain. In my experience (and I've had two jobs working at crappy hotels with bars in them), men tend to become assmonkeys when they're drunk, women either get all quiet, or tend to be a bit more fun to be around (and not just they're easier to score with) but often are more out-going and friendly (too friendly sometimes, but still.)
I've not adovcating taking advantage of drunk women, btw, just making an observation.
Personally, I never really understood drinking. Anything you have to WORK AT to enjoy, just doesn't make sense to me. I know, I know, you drink long enough they say you get a nice buzz and shit, but to me, beer tastes like crap, and it's just not worth fighting the urge to gag just to get state of inebriation. That's probably why I don't drink coffee either. If I need the caffeine, that's why God invented soda. It's sweet and wakes you up! :)
And don't even get me started on the stupidity of cigarrettes...
Plus there's another reason, I have enough trouble with saying shit that gets me in trouble when I'm SOBER. God only knows what the hell I'd do drunk. Probably reveal a bit more secrets than needs revealing.
But, back to the day at hand..
I saw my doctor (this is the doctor who gives me my depression medcine. You see, I have THREE doctors, my therapists, the guy I see for health reason, and the one who gives me my depression meds.) Anyway, I tell her I think we need to change medicines because I'm having a lot of suicidial thoughts, and getting depressed. She's like, "Well, might I'm not sure if that'll help. All depression medicine is pretty much da same. I don't think it'll do what you're expecting it to."
I countered, "Now, it was helping for awhile, but it just keeps wearing."
And she's like, "Well, it was helping because you were trying something new."
And I go, "Well, no, that's not true, the effexor helped for an entire year, but it started to wear off. The prozac worked for a couple of months, so, that says something should work."
"Oh, well, we can go back on effexor then..."
And I'm thinking, Uh.. not sure you're getting the point here...
Anyway, we talked for a bit more and decided we're going to cut back on my current med and then switch over to yet another pill. She told me that exercise "can do more than any pill" but, I told it's hard to exercise when you're depressed (hell, sometimes exercising makes me depressed.)
(sigh)
Maybe I need to switch doctors.
Course, she also suggested maybe more theraphy was in order. Now, that I could probably agree with. Dunno if my counselor could see me twice a week though, have to ask her about it. As for group, well, last I checked the only group session they had were mainly for domestic violence victims and whatnot.
Shoot.. more to talk about, but I don't feel like writing anymore right now....