Some More Uses For The Hammer
There are many uses for a hammer.
1 Use it to scratch your back
2 Use it to crack eggs
3 Duct tape the handle to the wall to hang some clothes
4 Have a can of paint? Why don't you open it with the hammer?
5 Mash potatoes with it
6 Move things that are dirty and untouchable
7 Fix computers
8 Cut the umbilical chord of a baby
9 Use it to open a pin~ata
10 Use it to open letters
11 Use it to get things that are just out of arm's reach.
12 Change the channel on the tv
13 Turn off the tv forever
14 Make DIY fireworks in your microwave
15 Demagnatize things by hitting them ( This one is actually very true.)
16 Close a circuit
17 Fire bullets
18 Type on your keyboard
19 Win a staring contest
20 Cut through wires
21 Tell if someone is really feigning death or sleep
22 Wake up a deep sleeper
23 Crush cans for recycling
24 Make clothes fit better in luggage
25 Become your own dentist with the claw of the hammer
26 Thresh your own grains
27 Grind your own flour
28 Did you know that hammers are natural insecticides? Try it yourself! Put one down on top of a bug the next time you see one. It will probably die.
29 Want your cake to have that "incompetent cooker" look? Tap on the edges while it is cooking to make it fall
30 Get stuff for free when there's a warranty
31 Don't just shred your documents for security-- Hammer them to a pulp
32 get rid of old china or glass you don't want to have around
33 Set off a metal detector purposefully
34 Attatch it to your RF Antenna for better reception
35 Cool down your drink by placing your hammer in the freezer (and then putting it inside said drink). It's like replaceable ice!
36 Get rid of those pesky air pockeds when kneading dough
37 Make a makeshift anchor
38 Land your plane on aircraft carriers by using it to catch the cables
39 Use it for anesthetic
40 Tilt the scales in your favor to win the Ice Skating Olympic Gold Medal. It's lighter and easier to conseal than a bat
41 Get the neighbors to quiet down in their apartment
42 Mash grapes to make wine
43 Make sure no one will attempt to steal your tires, and maybe even car by punching holes in them
44 Bend screwdrivers and other metal objects to have funny curves in them
45 Keep those pesky nails stuck in the wood of your club
46 Make old fashioned butter in your butter churner
47 Do it a lot faster to make whipped cream
48 Build a scale to weigh yourself
49 Make music with garbage cans and steel pipes
50 Make real music with steel drums
51 If you are becoming deficient in iron or other nutrients, grind some off of your hammer and eat it. Remember, there's not just iron in a hammer! There's zinc which is good for colds too!
52 Tired of the boring clay look of those Chinese Meditation Balls? Knock the clay off with your hammer to gain that gunmetal grey and rugged look
53 Having trouble with those electronic wires not being straight enough? Hammer them out with your hammer
54 Test structural integrity of things by hitting it with your hammer and seeing if it survives
55 Make sure your persuer won't get back up by swiftly tapping them in the knees with your hammer
56 Use it to put out a candle
57 Use it to have a better excuse than "The dog ate my homework"
58 Use it to hang your meats in your smoke house instead of a meat hook
59 Use it in a vehicular persuit to prevent the other person from following you by throwing it and hitting their front windshield
60 Use it to open bottles when you are thirsty for a drink
61 Get two hammers together and make chopsticks FIT FOR A GIANT MAN!!!
62 Having trouble sinking to the bottom of that pool or ocean? Fill your pockets with hammers to help you stay on the bottom.
63 Test your house for secret pathways by hitting walls with your hammer
64 is your guitar not making those percussive sounds you want? Hit it with your hammer like a drum!
65 Door knockers not cutting it? Chain a hammer to your door so you can know when visitors arrive!
66 Why only use a hammer on your own door? Bring it to your friend's house so they know it's you knocking!
67 Use a hammer to dig a hole for your plant garden
68 Don't have mirrors to reflect your lasers? Polish up the head of your hammer to reflect them to the desired location!
69 Trapped in a submarine? Hammer out SOS on your ship's hull! People are paid many dollars a second to detect underwater sounds. YOURS COULD BE ONE OF THEM!
70 Turn off the lights with a quick throw of your hammer! Don't forget to put a chain on it, so you don't have to walk to get it!
71 Use them to climb up an Ice City(iceberg)
72 Use them as an accessory to an interpretive dance
73 Have "Hammer Time" for real...!
74 Dull the blades of your scisors to make them "Child Safe"
75 About to fall out a window? use your hammer to grab the wall on the inside before you fall
76 Don't have a gearshift in your manual car? Use a hammer! It's unique!
77 See where your air conditioner vents lead by pounding on the went covers. You can clearly hear it if you listen at the other openings
78 Don't have a lightning conductor? Tape a hammer with a chain to your roof
79 Start a fire with your trusty hammer and piece of flint
80 Find the resonate frequencies of tubes for your next "Stomp" band
81 Cut down a tree with the claw of your hammer
82 Don't have lawn darts? Use a set of hammers instead!
83 Frisbee is for weak college students who can't compete in competitive sports. Use a hammer instead of a frisbee to up the risk 1000 fold, and get all the girls. Remember, women aren't attracted to safety; they crave danger.
84 Want to develop your accuracy in finding the sweet spot in the sport of tennis? use a hammer with an appropriate reach to match the sweet spot in your tennis racket
85 Ever gotten stuck eating lobster without a method to crack it's shell? Bring a hammer, and you can crack through most any crustacean!
I think 59 uses is good enough for one sitting.
1 Use it to scratch your back
2 Use it to crack eggs
3 Duct tape the handle to the wall to hang some clothes
4 Have a can of paint? Why don't you open it with the hammer?
5 Mash potatoes with it
6 Move things that are dirty and untouchable
7 Fix computers
8 Cut the umbilical chord of a baby
9 Use it to open a pin~ata
10 Use it to open letters
11 Use it to get things that are just out of arm's reach.
12 Change the channel on the tv
13 Turn off the tv forever
14 Make DIY fireworks in your microwave
15 Demagnatize things by hitting them ( This one is actually very true.)
16 Close a circuit
17 Fire bullets
18 Type on your keyboard
19 Win a staring contest
20 Cut through wires
21 Tell if someone is really feigning death or sleep
22 Wake up a deep sleeper
23 Crush cans for recycling
24 Make clothes fit better in luggage
25 Become your own dentist with the claw of the hammer
26 Thresh your own grains
27 Grind your own flour
28 Did you know that hammers are natural insecticides? Try it yourself! Put one down on top of a bug the next time you see one. It will probably die.
29 Want your cake to have that "incompetent cooker" look? Tap on the edges while it is cooking to make it fall
30 Get stuff for free when there's a warranty
31 Don't just shred your documents for security-- Hammer them to a pulp
32 get rid of old china or glass you don't want to have around
33 Set off a metal detector purposefully
34 Attatch it to your RF Antenna for better reception
35 Cool down your drink by placing your hammer in the freezer (and then putting it inside said drink). It's like replaceable ice!
36 Get rid of those pesky air pockeds when kneading dough
37 Make a makeshift anchor
38 Land your plane on aircraft carriers by using it to catch the cables
39 Use it for anesthetic
40 Tilt the scales in your favor to win the Ice Skating Olympic Gold Medal. It's lighter and easier to conseal than a bat
41 Get the neighbors to quiet down in their apartment
42 Mash grapes to make wine
43 Make sure no one will attempt to steal your tires, and maybe even car by punching holes in them
44 Bend screwdrivers and other metal objects to have funny curves in them
45 Keep those pesky nails stuck in the wood of your club
46 Make old fashioned butter in your butter churner
47 Do it a lot faster to make whipped cream
48 Build a scale to weigh yourself
49 Make music with garbage cans and steel pipes
50 Make real music with steel drums
51 If you are becoming deficient in iron or other nutrients, grind some off of your hammer and eat it. Remember, there's not just iron in a hammer! There's zinc which is good for colds too!
52 Tired of the boring clay look of those Chinese Meditation Balls? Knock the clay off with your hammer to gain that gunmetal grey and rugged look
53 Having trouble with those electronic wires not being straight enough? Hammer them out with your hammer
54 Test structural integrity of things by hitting it with your hammer and seeing if it survives
55 Make sure your persuer won't get back up by swiftly tapping them in the knees with your hammer
56 Use it to put out a candle
57 Use it to have a better excuse than "The dog ate my homework"
58 Use it to hang your meats in your smoke house instead of a meat hook
59 Use it in a vehicular persuit to prevent the other person from following you by throwing it and hitting their front windshield
60 Use it to open bottles when you are thirsty for a drink
61 Get two hammers together and make chopsticks FIT FOR A GIANT MAN!!!
62 Having trouble sinking to the bottom of that pool or ocean? Fill your pockets with hammers to help you stay on the bottom.
63 Test your house for secret pathways by hitting walls with your hammer
64 is your guitar not making those percussive sounds you want? Hit it with your hammer like a drum!
65 Door knockers not cutting it? Chain a hammer to your door so you can know when visitors arrive!
66 Why only use a hammer on your own door? Bring it to your friend's house so they know it's you knocking!
67 Use a hammer to dig a hole for your plant garden
68 Don't have mirrors to reflect your lasers? Polish up the head of your hammer to reflect them to the desired location!
69 Trapped in a submarine? Hammer out SOS on your ship's hull! People are paid many dollars a second to detect underwater sounds. YOURS COULD BE ONE OF THEM!
70 Turn off the lights with a quick throw of your hammer! Don't forget to put a chain on it, so you don't have to walk to get it!
71 Use them to climb up an Ice City(iceberg)
72 Use them as an accessory to an interpretive dance
73 Have "Hammer Time" for real...!
74 Dull the blades of your scisors to make them "Child Safe"
75 About to fall out a window? use your hammer to grab the wall on the inside before you fall
76 Don't have a gearshift in your manual car? Use a hammer! It's unique!
77 See where your air conditioner vents lead by pounding on the went covers. You can clearly hear it if you listen at the other openings
78 Don't have a lightning conductor? Tape a hammer with a chain to your roof
79 Start a fire with your trusty hammer and piece of flint
80 Find the resonate frequencies of tubes for your next "Stomp" band
81 Cut down a tree with the claw of your hammer
82 Don't have lawn darts? Use a set of hammers instead!
83 Frisbee is for weak college students who can't compete in competitive sports. Use a hammer instead of a frisbee to up the risk 1000 fold, and get all the girls. Remember, women aren't attracted to safety; they crave danger.
84 Want to develop your accuracy in finding the sweet spot in the sport of tennis? use a hammer with an appropriate reach to match the sweet spot in your tennis racket
85 Ever gotten stuck eating lobster without a method to crack it's shell? Bring a hammer, and you can crack through most any crustacean!
I think 59 uses is good enough for one sitting.