Alpha's Concerns
Day: Wednesday
Date: 07 February, 2001
Time: late evening after early rounds
Location: Hogwarts
( Private to Pansy Parkinson )
Date: 07 February, 2001
Time: late evening after early rounds
Location: Hogwarts
( Private to Pansy Parkinson )
The transformation itself is not pleasant, for either party. Perry's body is going to be magically torn apart and reformed twice in the span of hours. I can only liken it to the Cruciatus curse for the level of pain involved and for which you must be prepared to witness. For safety's sake, I can only tell you to keep well away from Perry's claws and snout during the transformation itself. It is likely there will be convulsions involved and Perry will not be able to control his body. It will be up to you to keep out of the way.
Having another person share that time can be profoundly emotional. I'm sure you know Perry well enough to know that he does not discuss things of an emotional nature easily. That is what I think you will need to be prepared for the most.
I have been a werewolf for a long time, Pansy. Believe me when I tell you that what you are going to do is a rare gesture. My own best mate was unable to stay for the actual transformations because it caused him too much pain to witness the process.
It's difficult to explain to someone who is not a werewolf how much of our psyches are twisted by the change. For twelve hours, the wolfsbane potion allows us to think like ourselves, but we are not ourselves. To have someone there is a reminder that no matter how much we try to deny it or behave otherwise, the fact is, we are not human.
You may find you wish to touch him in that form, stroke his fur in comfort. I have never seen Perry allow that, but I will also freely admit that until a year ago it would have been impossible. Without the potion, anyone coming near enough to a werewolf to touch it will either be dead or infected by morning. The fear of a missed dose has held me back from allowing that sort of intimacy from all but one person. Were someone to become too comfortable with me in that form and harm were to come to them because they got too close to me when I was not restrained with the potion...
I cannot speak for Perry, but I would not be surprised to find he has similar fears.
As I said, it's difficult to explain.
R. J. Lupin
P.S. Perry did not discuss it with me. I would not have you believe he has discussed your private affairs with the rest of us. He only informed me of your decision so that we would be prepared should anything go wrong. --RJL
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