(no subject)
Uni resumes in three days and I've been numbing my skull with early study. The set text for my final (yay) politics unit is called 'From Colony to Superpower: U.S. Foreign Relations since 1776' and has a mammoth 1046 pages in size 8 type. At roughly 600 words per page this equates to 635,968 words to be devoured between now and tutes in week two. Why, you might ask, would I bother with reading the whole thing? Because American politics isn't my forte. My area of expertise is Australian federal politics. If I don't absorb the knowledge now I'm screwed for a unit I need to get above 78 for. Or, I could politely ask my American housemate to recount her knowledge of American political history using hand puppets. But this would probably involve a considerable amount of trust in her knowledge, creative license (this puppet represents the Confederacy) and 16 uninterrupted hours of concentration. Reading it is.
So I recently EB traded some very shitty PS2 games. Fur Fighters: Viggo's Revenge - cute idea, very bad graphics - and Turok: Evolution. Again, an excellent, albeit overdone idea, but poorly executed. I traded them for Alone in the Dark. I'd been sceptical about the game but after hearing some very good reviews from a friend I decided to give it a chance. She will of course die now because Alone in the Dark was a giant waste of time. The controlling was awkward and clunky and the gameplay was painfully slow thanks to unnecessarily long cut-scenes that never actually clear up any of your confusion. The graphics and dialogue are of a ps1 standard which is disappointing for a game released in 2008. On top of all this the physical mechanics of action are extremely poor. Most of the game was spent staring at a wall attempting to figure out what was meant to happen next because of a glitch with the interaction button (you are able to do things like leap to a ledge if the button appears on screen, except if it doesn't you...can't). As a fan of those old-school adventure/survival horror games (think the first two of the Resident Evil series) I was really hoping to like this game. Alas, I wouldn't even use this game as a coaster.
Meanwhile, here is my incredibly delayed account of my holiday adventures in Sorrento:
Sorrento Day One:
After a surprisingly quick journey down we arrived at Sorrento at around 1:30pm. We indulged in an iced coffee (which was like an iced coffee granita and therefore very, very excellent) before heading over to our usual holiday accommodation at Bilinga Bed and Breakfast. Once settled we traipsed down to the Sorrento foreshore and spent several hours lying down and investigating sea life in the shallows. Miriam stalked a group of bottom feeder-type fish for about 40 minutes while I did what you're MEANT to do at the beach and swam, splashed and floated out in the murky depths. While out there I unsettled what I now know to be a stingray. I'd never seen one before and at the time couldn't identify it, which is actually quite embarrassing for an Australian. Luckily he didn't get too riled up about me trodding on him and merely sent me hurtling backwards into the ocean rather than piercing me with anything poison-filled. After this encounter I cautiously headed back to the shallows to alert the girlfriend, only to find she was still stalking the fish. I finally distracted her with a lazy crab and we criticised it for about five minutes on its inability to escape our giant hands. After an acceptable level of sunburn had been achieved we headed home to make and consume a circular lasagna.
Sorrento Day Two:
Since we were in the land of the retirees we thought we'd act the part and be thoroughly wholesome. We woke up early, got dressed (already we're in unfamiliar territory) and went for a walk to buy some milk and the daily paper. We came back and drank our morning coffee while swinging back and forth in a hammock. Yes. A hammock. I bet you don't have a hammock. The BOM had predicted a muggy, overcast day so we opted against visiting the beach again and instead went for an 8km walk between Sorrento and Portsea. On approaching the sand dunes we spotted several dark clouds and I started on what would be several hours of weather observations (a mild fascination that Miriam kindly tolerates). We ended up being caught in a strange fog/ocean mist that limited vision beyond 100 metres in all directions. It was kind of spooky looking out into the ocean (because we were on the tumultous ocean side of Sorrento rather than the more peaceful bay side) and not being able to see the horizon. I half expected to see a cargo ship drifting off course and into the dunes. We explored a few rock formations and Miriam poked about for shells to add to her collection (a mild fascination that I kindly tolerate). With enough sand in our shoes to make a fairly decent sandcastle we said goodbye to the wild Bass Strait and stumbled into Portsea.
Sorrento Day Three:
Threats of treacherous weather in Melbourne were not evident in Sorrento so we adventured at the beach again. Miriam befriended a four-year old named Lachlan who was out walking with his grandma. He'd taken an interest in her shell collecting and followed her around for 40 minutes bringing back average-looking shells with the enthusiasm of a labrador puppy while I swam about for a little while trying not to encounter stingrays. Eventually I headed back to shore and taught Lachlan how to skip stones/sea shells. Note: four-year olds generally can't throw very well. They don't have the centre of gravity or strength for accurate object hurling. But they can definitely throw better than my girlfriend. Lachlan got the shells to skip before Miriam did. Ahem. Anyway, Lachlan's grandmother eventually had to tear him away, but only after the cunning little chap invited us over to his house in Rosebud, an offer we politely declined.
Sorrento Day Four:
Time to leave!
After some very boring cleaning we left the house in much the same way we found it and headed back to Melbourne. But not before stopping off in Rosebud for another iced coffee and some caramel cashew fudge. Yeah, it was as good as it sounds. With our tummies in good spirits we attempted to set off for Melbourne again but found ourselves taking another detour into Arthurs Seat. Fun fact: there's an actual seat up on Arthurs Seat. No Arthur. The view was fantastic and I find myself wishing the chairlift was still in operation. Damn safety standards. And then we got home and I spent the next few hours wishing I was a retiree with a healthy bank account living on the peninsula. The end.
Melbourne Day 9385:
The weather is temperamental and I'm way too tanned for this town.
So I recently EB traded some very shitty PS2 games. Fur Fighters: Viggo's Revenge - cute idea, very bad graphics - and Turok: Evolution. Again, an excellent, albeit overdone idea, but poorly executed. I traded them for Alone in the Dark. I'd been sceptical about the game but after hearing some very good reviews from a friend I decided to give it a chance. She will of course die now because Alone in the Dark was a giant waste of time. The controlling was awkward and clunky and the gameplay was painfully slow thanks to unnecessarily long cut-scenes that never actually clear up any of your confusion. The graphics and dialogue are of a ps1 standard which is disappointing for a game released in 2008. On top of all this the physical mechanics of action are extremely poor. Most of the game was spent staring at a wall attempting to figure out what was meant to happen next because of a glitch with the interaction button (you are able to do things like leap to a ledge if the button appears on screen, except if it doesn't you...can't). As a fan of those old-school adventure/survival horror games (think the first two of the Resident Evil series) I was really hoping to like this game. Alas, I wouldn't even use this game as a coaster.
Meanwhile, here is my incredibly delayed account of my holiday adventures in Sorrento:
Sorrento Day One:
After a surprisingly quick journey down we arrived at Sorrento at around 1:30pm. We indulged in an iced coffee (which was like an iced coffee granita and therefore very, very excellent) before heading over to our usual holiday accommodation at Bilinga Bed and Breakfast. Once settled we traipsed down to the Sorrento foreshore and spent several hours lying down and investigating sea life in the shallows. Miriam stalked a group of bottom feeder-type fish for about 40 minutes while I did what you're MEANT to do at the beach and swam, splashed and floated out in the murky depths. While out there I unsettled what I now know to be a stingray. I'd never seen one before and at the time couldn't identify it, which is actually quite embarrassing for an Australian. Luckily he didn't get too riled up about me trodding on him and merely sent me hurtling backwards into the ocean rather than piercing me with anything poison-filled. After this encounter I cautiously headed back to the shallows to alert the girlfriend, only to find she was still stalking the fish. I finally distracted her with a lazy crab and we criticised it for about five minutes on its inability to escape our giant hands. After an acceptable level of sunburn had been achieved we headed home to make and consume a circular lasagna.
Sorrento Day Two:
Since we were in the land of the retirees we thought we'd act the part and be thoroughly wholesome. We woke up early, got dressed (already we're in unfamiliar territory) and went for a walk to buy some milk and the daily paper. We came back and drank our morning coffee while swinging back and forth in a hammock. Yes. A hammock. I bet you don't have a hammock. The BOM had predicted a muggy, overcast day so we opted against visiting the beach again and instead went for an 8km walk between Sorrento and Portsea. On approaching the sand dunes we spotted several dark clouds and I started on what would be several hours of weather observations (a mild fascination that Miriam kindly tolerates). We ended up being caught in a strange fog/ocean mist that limited vision beyond 100 metres in all directions. It was kind of spooky looking out into the ocean (because we were on the tumultous ocean side of Sorrento rather than the more peaceful bay side) and not being able to see the horizon. I half expected to see a cargo ship drifting off course and into the dunes. We explored a few rock formations and Miriam poked about for shells to add to her collection (a mild fascination that I kindly tolerate). With enough sand in our shoes to make a fairly decent sandcastle we said goodbye to the wild Bass Strait and stumbled into Portsea.
Sorrento Day Three:
Threats of treacherous weather in Melbourne were not evident in Sorrento so we adventured at the beach again. Miriam befriended a four-year old named Lachlan who was out walking with his grandma. He'd taken an interest in her shell collecting and followed her around for 40 minutes bringing back average-looking shells with the enthusiasm of a labrador puppy while I swam about for a little while trying not to encounter stingrays. Eventually I headed back to shore and taught Lachlan how to skip stones/sea shells. Note: four-year olds generally can't throw very well. They don't have the centre of gravity or strength for accurate object hurling. But they can definitely throw better than my girlfriend. Lachlan got the shells to skip before Miriam did. Ahem. Anyway, Lachlan's grandmother eventually had to tear him away, but only after the cunning little chap invited us over to his house in Rosebud, an offer we politely declined.
Sorrento Day Four:
Time to leave!
After some very boring cleaning we left the house in much the same way we found it and headed back to Melbourne. But not before stopping off in Rosebud for another iced coffee and some caramel cashew fudge. Yeah, it was as good as it sounds. With our tummies in good spirits we attempted to set off for Melbourne again but found ourselves taking another detour into Arthurs Seat. Fun fact: there's an actual seat up on Arthurs Seat. No Arthur. The view was fantastic and I find myself wishing the chairlift was still in operation. Damn safety standards. And then we got home and I spent the next few hours wishing I was a retiree with a healthy bank account living on the peninsula. The end.
Melbourne Day 9385:
The weather is temperamental and I'm way too tanned for this town.