sick today
haven't wrote in awhile.. so i dunno where to begin.
school has been alright. i thought that not taking a math or science this year would make things a lot easier, but it really hasn't changed much. american government and honors lit are really hard and i'm not gonna lie- it sucks. in photo/illustration we had to make some collage and i did it of my friends which was a predictable topic that i would choose. lisa did some thing on gay marriage and bush and how she hates him.. it was good, everyone liked it and no one had any comments on it. smuf's got a lot of feedback though and i felt bad- ms mcguint was kinda mean about it but what are ya gonna do. i haven't shared mine w/ the class yet.. i was supposed to today but i came home sick cause i seriously feel like crap.
so yeah, i came home sick today. i went to first period w/ mr. benware and i seriously refused to read my stupid epic poem. everyone else read except for me. i am sorry but i just didn't wanna read my piece of shit poem, but he was really cool about it and i'm glad. he told me that i can't make this a habit since its an honors course and because of that i'm going to have to read a lot of my writing to the class. well, thats fantastic right? i can't read in front of people i get real real nervous and i feel like everyone is watching me *which they are* so i get nervous and feel like throwing up all over myself. at least he isn't making me read this time... because i honestly felt like i would vomit all over my cba blouse.
a lot of things have actually changed lately.. and its really starting to effect me and the friendships i have with people, even though i wish it hadn't or wouldn't. i used to be so close with some people and now i feel like i have nothing in common with them. i know that we were bound to see which friendships would last and that people change... but why right now? why during our senior year? and i feel sometimes they blow me off when i try to tell them it isn't safe. one girl even gets somewhat angry w/ me when i try to tell her that you don't know these boys.. you don't know them, and to think you know them is wrong just because you've chilled w/ them for only a month and 1/2 the time your wasted. i only say waht i do because i really do love them- they have been my closest friends- and i am just terrifed. and i wanted this year to be so much fun for all of us since we're seniors.. but i have nothing to talk about w/ them anymore.. help :( :( :(
the other day i worked in cafe @ wegs and it seriously was such a scary time in my life. no, but like, i'm not evne joking, because it was. i don't know what all the buttons and codes are and they put me on register back there on the busiest day of the week *well one of them* - on a sunday. and i seriously was like flipping out. i made gina sit behind my register and eat so if i needed help i could call her over to me and she would help me. ginaaaa!! your such a good friend!! :)
i have SATs.. for the 3rd time.. this weekend. seriously, kill me now.
and friday i'm not doing anything but sitting at home and being a slacker
do you think that i will study? i don't think i will..
thats about it. peace out kiddies
<3
school has been alright. i thought that not taking a math or science this year would make things a lot easier, but it really hasn't changed much. american government and honors lit are really hard and i'm not gonna lie- it sucks. in photo/illustration we had to make some collage and i did it of my friends which was a predictable topic that i would choose. lisa did some thing on gay marriage and bush and how she hates him.. it was good, everyone liked it and no one had any comments on it. smuf's got a lot of feedback though and i felt bad- ms mcguint was kinda mean about it but what are ya gonna do. i haven't shared mine w/ the class yet.. i was supposed to today but i came home sick cause i seriously feel like crap.
so yeah, i came home sick today. i went to first period w/ mr. benware and i seriously refused to read my stupid epic poem. everyone else read except for me. i am sorry but i just didn't wanna read my piece of shit poem, but he was really cool about it and i'm glad. he told me that i can't make this a habit since its an honors course and because of that i'm going to have to read a lot of my writing to the class. well, thats fantastic right? i can't read in front of people i get real real nervous and i feel like everyone is watching me *which they are* so i get nervous and feel like throwing up all over myself. at least he isn't making me read this time... because i honestly felt like i would vomit all over my cba blouse.
a lot of things have actually changed lately.. and its really starting to effect me and the friendships i have with people, even though i wish it hadn't or wouldn't. i used to be so close with some people and now i feel like i have nothing in common with them. i know that we were bound to see which friendships would last and that people change... but why right now? why during our senior year? and i feel sometimes they blow me off when i try to tell them it isn't safe. one girl even gets somewhat angry w/ me when i try to tell her that you don't know these boys.. you don't know them, and to think you know them is wrong just because you've chilled w/ them for only a month and 1/2 the time your wasted. i only say waht i do because i really do love them- they have been my closest friends- and i am just terrifed. and i wanted this year to be so much fun for all of us since we're seniors.. but i have nothing to talk about w/ them anymore.. help :( :( :(
the other day i worked in cafe @ wegs and it seriously was such a scary time in my life. no, but like, i'm not evne joking, because it was. i don't know what all the buttons and codes are and they put me on register back there on the busiest day of the week *well one of them* - on a sunday. and i seriously was like flipping out. i made gina sit behind my register and eat so if i needed help i could call her over to me and she would help me. ginaaaa!! your such a good friend!! :)
i have SATs.. for the 3rd time.. this weekend. seriously, kill me now.
and friday i'm not doing anything but sitting at home and being a slacker
do you think that i will study? i don't think i will..
thats about it. peace out kiddies
<3