(no subject)
Everyone slept really badly last night. Jess said it was because of the full moon, which makes lots of sense.
I had lots of nightmares and felt really strange until the sun came up, then I had nice dreams about Bane.
I haven't done any work and I'm getting stressed again. I don't think I can do it after all. It's more management shit. Again. I'm so sick of it. I'm thikning about swapping to Drama and Performance. Although the management and busienss skilsl we're learning are useful, it's boring as fuck and I don't feel as though I really connect with anyone in my group. I like Eliot, Nadia, Rach and Sylva, but we don't have anything in common. Me and Nadia are both ravers, but she's more psy trance, so tha's a really big difference.
I woke up feeling guilty. I text Eliot and asked him to pick me up a Unit guide and appologise to Roger for me, but he didn't go in, either. He'd been awake all night crying about his friend. I feel so bad. I didn't beleive him when he needed me. I told him to get in contact if he needs anything. I don't really know how to deal with it. I think he needs to see a doctor.
Last night was fun, we sat in the kitchen chatting and pissing about. I found out that Mark's family are really super rich. I always thought he had a lot of money, but didn't get that it was that crazy. I left my MSN on and walked away from my conversation with Danny and my computer turned itself off, so he text me saying 'Thanks. I feel special.' It was odd. I knew he was winding me up, so I didn't rise to it, I just said sorry and started a new conversation... But he took it so far and even hung up when I phoned him. I told him it was war. It was really strange, like funny but also really stressy. Maybe I just find it hard not to get wound up.
We spoke on the phone and I told him I was under the thumb. He laughed and said he knew, but not to worry because he wouldn't take the piss. Too fucking right. But. I mean. Since when have I been like this with a man? It doesn't happen. Not even with Dave.
He's going to come and stay from the Thursday, we think. He doesn't wana make us late for HN, but doesn't wana have to take too long off work, so Thursday night until Sunday is probobly the best option. Then I get him all to myself on Friday, too. I have to go to a lecture in the morning, but he said he'd amuse himself, so that's cool. I told him not to get drunk whilst I was learning and he said he wouldn't.
I want a new outfit for HN. I went on Emma's site and theres a pink and white dress with a new neckline that I was trying to describe to her... And some pink and white fluffies... So that would look very smexy if she can do it in time. It sounds really stupid, but I wana look nice for Danny. It's lame. And I've never done it before. I duno why. :-S Obviously it's mainly for me... But such a large part of it is to make him happy. I think it could be dangerous.
Hmm. Arts Council application calls.
I want PIzza for dinner. Mmm.
xxx
I had lots of nightmares and felt really strange until the sun came up, then I had nice dreams about Bane.
I haven't done any work and I'm getting stressed again. I don't think I can do it after all. It's more management shit. Again. I'm so sick of it. I'm thikning about swapping to Drama and Performance. Although the management and busienss skilsl we're learning are useful, it's boring as fuck and I don't feel as though I really connect with anyone in my group. I like Eliot, Nadia, Rach and Sylva, but we don't have anything in common. Me and Nadia are both ravers, but she's more psy trance, so tha's a really big difference.
I woke up feeling guilty. I text Eliot and asked him to pick me up a Unit guide and appologise to Roger for me, but he didn't go in, either. He'd been awake all night crying about his friend. I feel so bad. I didn't beleive him when he needed me. I told him to get in contact if he needs anything. I don't really know how to deal with it. I think he needs to see a doctor.
Last night was fun, we sat in the kitchen chatting and pissing about. I found out that Mark's family are really super rich. I always thought he had a lot of money, but didn't get that it was that crazy. I left my MSN on and walked away from my conversation with Danny and my computer turned itself off, so he text me saying 'Thanks. I feel special.' It was odd. I knew he was winding me up, so I didn't rise to it, I just said sorry and started a new conversation... But he took it so far and even hung up when I phoned him. I told him it was war. It was really strange, like funny but also really stressy. Maybe I just find it hard not to get wound up.
We spoke on the phone and I told him I was under the thumb. He laughed and said he knew, but not to worry because he wouldn't take the piss. Too fucking right. But. I mean. Since when have I been like this with a man? It doesn't happen. Not even with Dave.
He's going to come and stay from the Thursday, we think. He doesn't wana make us late for HN, but doesn't wana have to take too long off work, so Thursday night until Sunday is probobly the best option. Then I get him all to myself on Friday, too. I have to go to a lecture in the morning, but he said he'd amuse himself, so that's cool. I told him not to get drunk whilst I was learning and he said he wouldn't.
I want a new outfit for HN. I went on Emma's site and theres a pink and white dress with a new neckline that I was trying to describe to her... And some pink and white fluffies... So that would look very smexy if she can do it in time. It sounds really stupid, but I wana look nice for Danny. It's lame. And I've never done it before. I duno why. :-S Obviously it's mainly for me... But such a large part of it is to make him happy. I think it could be dangerous.
Hmm. Arts Council application calls.
I want PIzza for dinner. Mmm.
xxx