New Kind of Trophy Wife
Today was supposed to be my day off.
Supposed to be.
I went to bed last night at about 9:30, 10pm because I was just so exhausted, I couldn't focus on anything, nor could I keep my eyes open, so I just gave in and went to bed. My cell phone rang at 7:30 this morning.... I didn't answer because it was a phone number I didn't recognize. A while later, my phone beeps that I have a new voicemail. So I listen in. It was my manager Bill saying he had scheduled me to come in at 7 this morning and wondered where I was.
My first reaction? Sitting straight up in bed with extremely wide eyes as I nearly scream "WHAT THE FUCK?!" Last I looked at the schedule, the day before when I had gone in in the morning, it said I had today off... Like I have been the last couple of weeks or so. Suddenly worried like hell, I called back.
He changed the schedule in the afternoon yesterday after I had left. But thought I looked at it when I was in later in the day yesterday. I had been to the store because mom was doing shops and I was taken along with. I was sitting in the car, reading, but mom came out a while later saying "Would you like to clean their machine for them? It's locked up." She had tried to make a Hot Chocolate, but couldn't because no one cleaned it after I left.
I told them yesterday a half hour before I was schedule to leave "Can I clean the machine so it doesn't lock up later? Someone just needs to take my headset for lane two and tell the cars to pull forward to the first window, so that I can focus on cleaning the machine." I'm not a multitasker when it comes to things like that, I HAVE to be completely focused on the cleaning, because I"m already multitasking when I do that. They didn't let me clean it. So it locked up later. No one cared. Pisses me off. The registered cleaning time is 1pm.... and you have a two hour window. So you can clean it anytime between 11am and 3pm before it locks up on you. I was schedule to leave at 12 yesterday, so at 11:30, I had asked. Mom was at the store at 4:30 yesterday..... I cleaned the machine at 4:45. Almost two hours it had been locked up, and no one bothered to stop and clean it, or even look to see that it was needing cleaning. I bet that if I didn't clean it yesterday, it would have still be locked up this morning. But anyway, while I was there, I guess Bill was expecting that I would look at the schedule while I was there.
Why would I look at the schedule when I had already looked at it earlier in the day? If no one tells me "Schedule has changed, see if your hours are the same," I'm not going to look again.
So I got dressed and rushed off, and got to work just before 8am this morning. Stocked up on the machine because.... There was enough whole milk left for one drink, and absolutely no extra containers of whole milk in the fridge under it. There were barely any spoons, there were no medium cups, low on large cups, the station was a mess from the last person who made a drink [milk and espresso was splashed all over the machine and the fridge, and a drity spoon was laying on the machine]. As soon as I finished stocking up, the big wigs started showing up.
I faked my smile for the day as they were there and were asking me questions. All I did was my coffee and orange juice. By the time lunch came around, the big-wigs were still there, but I was never given a headset for lane two of drive thru. Why? Because the big-wigs don't know that they have me doing things other than the coffee after breakfast is over. Huh, go figure. I had a feeling they had NO IDEA they had me taking orders in drive-thru, I had a feeling they had NO IDEA they had me doing fries without any training whatsoever. So the depression seriously hit.
I started thinking.... "I'm seriously just the trophy wife of this store." Let me explain. I'm treated.... OK most of the time. I do NOT get along well with a couple of the managers mainly because they bark orders at me and I try to tell them "I'm not trained to" and they think a simple walk through of how to work a certain station is enough to park me there all alone and do it for the rest of the day. That's when no one is looking. That is when the Store Manager, Bill, is in the back all day and never up front to see what is going on. That's when the Big-Wigs aren't around to see what they are doing to their new employees.
When the big-wigs are around, it's all nice and sweetness to the Coffee Specialist. "Can you please make me a Vanilla Latte for Register 2?" compared to "I NEED THAT VANILLA LATTE NOW!" "I'M WORKING ON IT!!!!" And instead of "Give Rebecca the headset for Lane 2 now." Other employee asking "Well what am I going to do now?" and the manager working the floor has to take a few minutes to think of where to place her because everything is taken up, there was no switching of headsets today. It isn't "Rebecca, can you take over Lane 2 for a while so Reggie can take his lunch break?"
No.... and that's what it's supposed to be, is that later in the day, when it's dead, I'm only supposed to take over when someone needs a break.... not all freakin' day
The silence was nice today after Lunch started and no one told me to take Lane 2..... But I had nothing to do, and the big-wigs were still there, and I was re-scheduled until 2, and I had nothing to do. So I stocked up on the station, made sure it was clean, and asked if I could leave. Before I was even done asking, Bill said "Yes, thank you, you can go."
In the car on the way home, I thought of this theory of the trophy wife. I wanted to cry this morning when I was getting ready for work.. I wanted to cry on the way home.... I want to cry right now.... Today was supposed to be my day off. So do you think that they would give me tomorrow off in exchange for working today? No. Get Friday off instead? No. Saturday off? No. Next day off is Sunday, just like last week. So I'm working all week again without a break. I'm ready to break down.
I was hoping to wake up late this morning.... or as late as my body has been letting me sleep in, and wake up slowly, tumble out of bed slowly... take my time this morning to check my messages, take my time with feeding the puppies, and giving them love. Take time to take the longest shower or bath that the hot water would permit me to. And then relax more by working on cutting patterns out for Esther, or working on writing or editing my story.
Not anymore. Now I just want to curl back up in my bed and cry and try to make the day go away. Tell myself this is all just a bad dream, that I didn't really get involved in this job, that it was a blissful dream at first, that turned into a nightmare, and that I'll wake up to reality really soon and still be jobless, that Specialty Coffee isn't available at Chambers and Mississippi yet, and that I can still turn the offer down.
Mom says I need to train someone who will know this to a T and can work mornings and whenever, and is just as good as me, that can take over for me when Iliff gets their Speciality Coffee machine up and I ask for a transfer to that store.
I don't want anything to do with that store anymore. I don't have a problem with Bill, I don't have a problem with another manager named Glenn, but all the other managers, I wish I never had to work with them. I love all the crew, as annoying as some of them can get. I'm tired of them not listening to "I'm not a morning person, please don't schedule me mornings" only to see I'm working 7am one day, 6am another day.... I'm tired of telling them "I need off by 5 on Thursday so I can go to Youth Group" only to have them schedule me until 7:30 on Thursday night. I'm tired of asking for help with trying to figure something out on the drive-thru register, and no one hears me, so by the time I go and find someone who will listen, the person I was trying to help has either driven off or pulled forward before I could finalize their order, or even type anything in. I'm tired of coming home every day, stressed by both crew/management, and customers I shouldn't be dealing with. I'm tired from running in circles to get someone's attention. I'm tired of our system crashing, or credit card machines not working and no one telling me, tired of stations being down and no one telling me, tired of being ignored and having people overlook me.... My training was a month and a day ago..... I've been working for a little less than a month....... And it's been a month of hell........
Supposed to be.
I went to bed last night at about 9:30, 10pm because I was just so exhausted, I couldn't focus on anything, nor could I keep my eyes open, so I just gave in and went to bed. My cell phone rang at 7:30 this morning.... I didn't answer because it was a phone number I didn't recognize. A while later, my phone beeps that I have a new voicemail. So I listen in. It was my manager Bill saying he had scheduled me to come in at 7 this morning and wondered where I was.
My first reaction? Sitting straight up in bed with extremely wide eyes as I nearly scream "WHAT THE FUCK?!" Last I looked at the schedule, the day before when I had gone in in the morning, it said I had today off... Like I have been the last couple of weeks or so. Suddenly worried like hell, I called back.
He changed the schedule in the afternoon yesterday after I had left. But thought I looked at it when I was in later in the day yesterday. I had been to the store because mom was doing shops and I was taken along with. I was sitting in the car, reading, but mom came out a while later saying "Would you like to clean their machine for them? It's locked up." She had tried to make a Hot Chocolate, but couldn't because no one cleaned it after I left.
I told them yesterday a half hour before I was schedule to leave "Can I clean the machine so it doesn't lock up later? Someone just needs to take my headset for lane two and tell the cars to pull forward to the first window, so that I can focus on cleaning the machine." I'm not a multitasker when it comes to things like that, I HAVE to be completely focused on the cleaning, because I"m already multitasking when I do that. They didn't let me clean it. So it locked up later. No one cared. Pisses me off. The registered cleaning time is 1pm.... and you have a two hour window. So you can clean it anytime between 11am and 3pm before it locks up on you. I was schedule to leave at 12 yesterday, so at 11:30, I had asked. Mom was at the store at 4:30 yesterday..... I cleaned the machine at 4:45. Almost two hours it had been locked up, and no one bothered to stop and clean it, or even look to see that it was needing cleaning. I bet that if I didn't clean it yesterday, it would have still be locked up this morning. But anyway, while I was there, I guess Bill was expecting that I would look at the schedule while I was there.
Why would I look at the schedule when I had already looked at it earlier in the day? If no one tells me "Schedule has changed, see if your hours are the same," I'm not going to look again.
So I got dressed and rushed off, and got to work just before 8am this morning. Stocked up on the machine because.... There was enough whole milk left for one drink, and absolutely no extra containers of whole milk in the fridge under it. There were barely any spoons, there were no medium cups, low on large cups, the station was a mess from the last person who made a drink [milk and espresso was splashed all over the machine and the fridge, and a drity spoon was laying on the machine]. As soon as I finished stocking up, the big wigs started showing up.
I faked my smile for the day as they were there and were asking me questions. All I did was my coffee and orange juice. By the time lunch came around, the big-wigs were still there, but I was never given a headset for lane two of drive thru. Why? Because the big-wigs don't know that they have me doing things other than the coffee after breakfast is over. Huh, go figure. I had a feeling they had NO IDEA they had me taking orders in drive-thru, I had a feeling they had NO IDEA they had me doing fries without any training whatsoever. So the depression seriously hit.
I started thinking.... "I'm seriously just the trophy wife of this store." Let me explain. I'm treated.... OK most of the time. I do NOT get along well with a couple of the managers mainly because they bark orders at me and I try to tell them "I'm not trained to" and they think a simple walk through of how to work a certain station is enough to park me there all alone and do it for the rest of the day. That's when no one is looking. That is when the Store Manager, Bill, is in the back all day and never up front to see what is going on. That's when the Big-Wigs aren't around to see what they are doing to their new employees.
When the big-wigs are around, it's all nice and sweetness to the Coffee Specialist. "Can you please make me a Vanilla Latte for Register 2?" compared to "I NEED THAT VANILLA LATTE NOW!" "I'M WORKING ON IT!!!!" And instead of "Give Rebecca the headset for Lane 2 now." Other employee asking "Well what am I going to do now?" and the manager working the floor has to take a few minutes to think of where to place her because everything is taken up, there was no switching of headsets today. It isn't "Rebecca, can you take over Lane 2 for a while so Reggie can take his lunch break?"
No.... and that's what it's supposed to be, is that later in the day, when it's dead, I'm only supposed to take over when someone needs a break.... not all freakin' day
The silence was nice today after Lunch started and no one told me to take Lane 2..... But I had nothing to do, and the big-wigs were still there, and I was re-scheduled until 2, and I had nothing to do. So I stocked up on the station, made sure it was clean, and asked if I could leave. Before I was even done asking, Bill said "Yes, thank you, you can go."
In the car on the way home, I thought of this theory of the trophy wife. I wanted to cry this morning when I was getting ready for work.. I wanted to cry on the way home.... I want to cry right now.... Today was supposed to be my day off. So do you think that they would give me tomorrow off in exchange for working today? No. Get Friday off instead? No. Saturday off? No. Next day off is Sunday, just like last week. So I'm working all week again without a break. I'm ready to break down.
I was hoping to wake up late this morning.... or as late as my body has been letting me sleep in, and wake up slowly, tumble out of bed slowly... take my time this morning to check my messages, take my time with feeding the puppies, and giving them love. Take time to take the longest shower or bath that the hot water would permit me to. And then relax more by working on cutting patterns out for Esther, or working on writing or editing my story.
Not anymore. Now I just want to curl back up in my bed and cry and try to make the day go away. Tell myself this is all just a bad dream, that I didn't really get involved in this job, that it was a blissful dream at first, that turned into a nightmare, and that I'll wake up to reality really soon and still be jobless, that Specialty Coffee isn't available at Chambers and Mississippi yet, and that I can still turn the offer down.
Mom says I need to train someone who will know this to a T and can work mornings and whenever, and is just as good as me, that can take over for me when Iliff gets their Speciality Coffee machine up and I ask for a transfer to that store.
I don't want anything to do with that store anymore. I don't have a problem with Bill, I don't have a problem with another manager named Glenn, but all the other managers, I wish I never had to work with them. I love all the crew, as annoying as some of them can get. I'm tired of them not listening to "I'm not a morning person, please don't schedule me mornings" only to see I'm working 7am one day, 6am another day.... I'm tired of telling them "I need off by 5 on Thursday so I can go to Youth Group" only to have them schedule me until 7:30 on Thursday night. I'm tired of asking for help with trying to figure something out on the drive-thru register, and no one hears me, so by the time I go and find someone who will listen, the person I was trying to help has either driven off or pulled forward before I could finalize their order, or even type anything in. I'm tired of coming home every day, stressed by both crew/management, and customers I shouldn't be dealing with. I'm tired from running in circles to get someone's attention. I'm tired of our system crashing, or credit card machines not working and no one telling me, tired of stations being down and no one telling me, tired of being ignored and having people overlook me.... My training was a month and a day ago..... I've been working for a little less than a month....... And it's been a month of hell........