i believe, quite simply, that i misinterpret life.
i thought, once, that i had friends...
that i did well to surround myself only with people who actually cared about me. who accepted me for what i was, the good and the bad, and who would be there.
i thought i was, or at least always sincerly tried, to be their true friends... i didn't talk shit or backstab... they knew whatever i was thinking... how i felt about things... and i loved them. (i do love them.)
and i thought it was mutual. i thought the friendships were honest. lasting. but, mostly, i thought they were real.
i thought wrong.
i have few, if any, at times.
i suppose that's ok. but, perhaps, i should be on search of new ones?
or at least be searching for what the issue is with me...
what if i just want the old ones to be real?
what if i just want things the way they used to be?
no one will have me. not as i am.
and change, for me, never seems to work-out.
i believe, quite simply, that i misinterpret life.
and i know, for fact now, that i misinterpret friendship and love.
what is it, exactly, that is so wrong with me?
if someone would tell me... maybe i could fix it?
that i did well to surround myself only with people who actually cared about me. who accepted me for what i was, the good and the bad, and who would be there.
i thought i was, or at least always sincerly tried, to be their true friends... i didn't talk shit or backstab... they knew whatever i was thinking... how i felt about things... and i loved them. (i do love them.)
and i thought it was mutual. i thought the friendships were honest. lasting. but, mostly, i thought they were real.
i thought wrong.
i have few, if any, at times.
i suppose that's ok. but, perhaps, i should be on search of new ones?
or at least be searching for what the issue is with me...
what if i just want the old ones to be real?
what if i just want things the way they used to be?
no one will have me. not as i am.
and change, for me, never seems to work-out.
i believe, quite simply, that i misinterpret life.
and i know, for fact now, that i misinterpret friendship and love.
what is it, exactly, that is so wrong with me?
if someone would tell me... maybe i could fix it?