Weeks

Apr 20, 2010 21:27

Title: Weeks
Paring: Taemin/Onew, Jonghyun/Onew
Rating: PG
Summary: The first time it dawns on Jinki that he's going to spend the rest of his life with Taemin, it's a Sunday.
a/n: okay--i have a 200 pt. assignment due in a month and this is how i don't do it. ♥ well, i was doing both. but mostly this. ♥

On Monday, it's been almost a month since Jinki's seen Taemin.

The loneliness is a near-constant ache in his stomach. So when Kim Jonghyun asks him to share a meal with him one night after practice, he accepts without thinking. He's an attractive man, a little younger than Jinki, and he's known him for a few months now. Maybe it's because he reminds him of Taemin, maybe it's because he leans just a little too close and touches him just a little too often. Maybe it's because he reminds him that it's possible to have relationships that doesn’t require commitment. It doesn't matter. All Jinki knows is that he lets Jonghyun lean in to kiss him before remembering that he's already seeing someone, and he doesn't actually want anyone other than Taemin. He steps back, apologizing profusely, and tells him he didn't mean to give the impression he was looking for anything more than friendship. It's a lie, pure and simple. He knew exactly what he was doing. But Jonghyun pretends to believe him, and congratulates him the next time they meet and he's wearing a ring. It's more than he deserves, and Jinki resolves to tell Taemin about it when he gets home.

He never does.

On Tuesday, Taemin caught Jinki staring at a boy.

And not just any boy, either, but a real looker: easy smile, legs up to here, beautiful laugh, the works. He was wrapped around some guy, completely into it, just happy to be standing there with him, glowing with it. Taemin only noticed because he'd been looking at him too (he wasn't blind) and he'd glanced at Jinki after, a little chagrined, to see if Jinki had caught him looking -- and Jinki was looking. Staring at him like he was having some sort of revelation. It was so unexpected that Taemin dropped his fry -- snatched by the dog tied to the table next to theirs before it even hit the ground-- and glanced over at Jinki again to see if he was maybe hallucinating.

But no, a split second after Taemin turned to him, he darted a look at Taemin, then he looked away, just as quick. Taemin coughs, letting out a whisper, “Just this once, alright?” as Jinki’s pink face turns to pay the waitress.

On Wednesday, Jinki admits he’s not romantic.

He tries it occasionally, but he usually gets it wrong - Taemin still teases him about the flowers he bought for their first real 'date'. So when Taemin suggests they do something for Valentine's Day he flies into a panic, spending weeks reading magazines and asking people's advice as obliquely as he can. Taemin’s Pomeranian -which he claims is half-wolf, and a fourth Siberian husky-watches him with an expression somewhere between amusement and pity, which really is intolerable. How bad must he be that the dog feels sorry for him? In the end he gives up and just takes Taemin for a walk down by the lake. It's dark and cold, but the sky's clear and they can see the stars as they walk. Part way back to the car, Jinki realizes he's been holding Taemin's hand and stops walking, staring down at their entwined fingers. When he looks up, Taemin's smiling at him. Jinki starts to apologize, for not getting a gift, for not being romantic enough, for the public display. But Taemin just takes a step closer and kisses him, warm and soft and full of promise. "This is more than enough," he says, and Jinki thinks maybe, just maybe, this time he might have got it right.

He meets Jonghyun again on Thursday.

Jonghyun pushed a cup of hot coffee into his hands and maneuvered himself next to Jinki on the couch. Jinki clasped his hands around the styrofoam, shivering, waiting for the heater to finally kick in. Jinki could feel the awkward meter rising every wordless second.

"Uh, hey, Jonghyun..." he started, “Taemin and I are going to throw a party next week, if you and Kibum are free, it starts at sev---”

"Onew," and there was heat in Jonghyun's voice, heat and anger and frustration and love, and Jinki flinched at the sudden rise in temperature. He opened his mouth to say stop, or wait, because he didn't think he could do this, but Jonghyun wasn't stopping, Jonghyun was touching his arm, running his hand over his thigh, and whispering his name, Onew, Onew, Jinki.

And then Jonghyun kissed him, kissed him hard. He felt Jonghyun's hand on the back of his neck, pulling him forward, and Jonghyun's other hand on his shoulder, clenching and unclenching, as if Jonghyun was afraid to hold on, afraid to let go. Jonghyun's tongue flickered over his bottom lip and Jinki opened his mouth on a gasp, and then Jonghyun was there again, filling Jinki's mouth with his tongue and kissing him with all that heat and anger and frustration. Jinki could hear the sound of their breathing--it filled up the small space between them, fast and frantic, like the beating of his heart--and a sound like distant thunder, like the rush of water, spilling over ice floes breaking up in the spring.

He kissed back.

On Friday, they sat silently listening to the broken answering machine repeat the message over and over.

Message received on Saturday, December 19, 2009, at 1:47AM,

Um, hey, Onew. This is Jonghyun, if you haven’t already guessed. Um, about earlier. Yeah, I’m sorry. You totally didn’t deserve that, I was just acting on impulse. I mean, you’re gorgeous, do you realize that? God, fuck. I know, Kibum. Kibum, Kibum, Kibum. And you have Taemin. But, you kissed back. And now I’m confused. I want you, you know that. It was obvious on Monday, wasn’t it? Can I see you again, one last time? I promise no kissing, I’ll bring Kibum and you bring Taemin, alright? I’m sure they’ll get along. Anyways, sorry for the ridiculously long message. I’ll hang up now.

“I can explain, Taemin,” Jinki rose from his seat to push Taemin-much more forcibly than he wanted-back into his seat, “Jonghyun is my best-friend’s boyfriend!”

“You’re pure scum,” Taemin gasped, rising from his seat.

“No, that came out wrong,” Jinki secured a grip on Taemin’s wrist, “He suddenly kissed me, out of the blue, and I knew what I was doing but I kissed back. And I meant to tell you, I really did, about how he tried to kiss me on Monday, but I was scared. Because I knew. I knew I wanted to kiss him. Because he smelled like strawberry, which reminded me of Kibum and what happened in the locker room during 6th grade. And then he smiled, just like Minho used to before he left me for that Thai guy. He laughed the same laugh Taeyeon used to have before she realized Tiffany was the only one for her. And he told me how funny I was, just like Kyuhyun used to before he went back to Busan and Donghae. And then…” Jinki’s voice faltered trying to hold back a sob, “And then…”

Taemin put a finger to Jinki’s mouth, smiling, “I know, you’re not that big of a moron.”

Jinki looked frantic. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” Taemin giggled, “Now kiss me.”

On Saturday, Taemin tells Jinki he can’t dance.

Taemin once told Jinki that he sings like a bird, and it's true. He loves listening to him sing, whether it's around a campfire with his other crazy friends, or in their house when he thinks Taemin's not listening. There's a light comes on in his eyes when he does it, and Taemin knows it's the same light he has when he's dancing. How it's possible for the Onew to dance like a block of wood when he feels the music as deep as he does remains a mystery, but Taemin's working on it. Little by little he's getting Jinki to relax, and even if he’s still not as comfortable in Taemin's arms as he was in Minho’s, well, that's okay. He and Jinki, they just got a different beat, that's all.

They have plenty of time to learn how to move to it.

The first time it dawns on Jinki that he's going to spend the rest of his life with Taemin, it's a Sunday.

Jinki pulls Taemin into his arms, kissing him slowly and deeply. Then he maneuvers them to the bedroom, undressing them both as he goes. Taemin falls back on the bed, laughing, and Jinki sees in his eyes that he feels it too. He's not sure what they've been doing until that point, not sure he's allowed himself to think about it.

But that's the moment Jinki remembers knowing for certain what they have is something a bit more complex than he thought.

a/n: it's not my best work, but hey. also marine bio project = ontae? lol i wish.

pairing: onew/jonghyun, rating: pg, pairing: onew/taemin

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