ficspam: random bits and pieces
that've been laying around in my Crap file (er, which is stuffed with things like job numbers, interview info, icon html...)
"Damnit, Jack, I'm not taking your name."
"But, Spacemonkey--"
"I told you not to call me that!"
"I know how to make it all better."
"No. Jack, I'm not having sex with you."
"Daniel."
"Jack."
"Daniel!"
"Only if you take my name, too."
"Ok. Can we have sex now?"
"Yes."
Dude, Kara would SO do it. Because someone would say, "Bet you can't take them both" and she'd scoff, and they'd tell her to prove it. And she'd SO grin, "All right. So, Lee, I was wondering if you're free tonight?"
"Uh... Kara?"
"Well, Helo and I were going to do a little experimenting." (because as we all know, Helo's in it for the sex, and doesn't care who else is there. Although the CAG would give him pause)
"...experimenting."
"Yeah." She smirked, eyes widening in apparent innocence. "It's going to involve a little drinking."
"Kara."
"Lee."
He snorted and crossed his arms, "What are you really after?"
"Both of you."
"You--my gods. You're serious."
"As I'll ever be." The grin shifted, turned cajoling, "C'mon, Lee, what've you got to lose?"
He groaned and ran a hand through his hair. "Kara."
"It's just sex, Lee."
"All right." He gaped, disturbed to have agreed. "Fine."
"Fine." A giggle escaped her. "C'mon, Captain."
-=-
"Forgive me?"
Kara snorted, then gasped. "Maybe."
A snicker came from behind her and Helo's fingers slid down her back. "She's a hard one for forgiveness, Captain. May have to try harder."
"I'm," Lee grunted, "Trying as hard as I can."
She's been expecting this (she thinks she's always been expecting this from him). Don't do this. Don't push, Lee. But of course he has to.
Of course, he has to poke and prod until she's seeing red.
And it's at least an honest red that forces her into action, the arc of her punch beautiful before it impacts.
He hits back, and she slams into the bench.
And she thinks, Finally.
Now he knows how far she can be pushed. And she knows the same about him.
"It's a dog."
"I can see that, Major."
"It's a fluffy dog."
"You sound like you're trying to sell me something."
"Well..."
"I told you no pets, Sheppard."
"But, Weir, it's a dog. A cute dog."
"That dog doesn't belong in Atlantis. Take it back. Now."
"But Rodney's already promised Beckett and his people they could investigate it."
"No."
"But--"
"Major."
"Doctor."
"It. Goes. Back."
"They're going to kill it for food."
"..."
"We wouldn't have brought it, otherwise, but we couldn't just let it die."
"Ask Teyla if her people can take it."
"But--"
"Major, for all we know, this 'dog' is a vital meat animal. I should make you send it back."
"But you won't."
"No, but I am requiring that you turn it over to the Athoisans. And if they can't take it, it goes back."
"But--"
"You can visit Rover on your days off, Major."
"But I don't *have* days off!"
"Really?"
"Well, unless you're there."
"Major, I'm beginning to suspect--"
"Suspect? Dr. Weir, I don't know what you're thinking, but it's obvious that you have a dirty mind."
"Pot, kettle, Major."
"I never deny mine."
"Thank god for that."
"Hey! Sarcasm isn't nice."
"Go take your dog to Teyla, Major."
"Fine. See if I rub your back tonight."
"Guess you'll be sleeping alone, then."
"...y'know, I think I've reconsidered."
"Go, Major."
"Yes, doctor."
'Stay here, don't get into trouble.' Simple instructions from a complicated (and possibly insane) man. Rose accepts them and stays at the entrance to the ruins, already bored. The sky is bright, the plants are greener than anything outside of a Ground Force marathon, and the ruins might once have been interesting, but he hasn't bothered to explain.
"How intriguing." The voice comes from her right, and she turns and stares at the woman who stands there. "You're human."
"I'm sorry?" She's a little confused, a little disturbed. It's been two days, and this whole experience seems like a drug trip (not that she does drugs, she's a good little girl, after all). Rose is sure that in three weeks this will all seem perfectly normal to her, but right now, obscenely bright blue skies and ruins covered in moss aren't exactly Stonehenge.
The blonde slinks closer, her lips parting in a smile, her voice purrs as she says: "You're human. It's very... quaint."
Rose Tyler doesn't know a lot about the big universe outside her front door, but she does know that aliens aren't always a good commodity to discover. Especially when your current guide into the strange has kited off to do something he wouldn't bother to explain. She backs up a step, then stops. "Are you human?"
"The question is, 'Are you alive?'"
"Yes, of course I am. Are you mad? You're mad, aren't you? Like Mrs. Parsons who lives in 14b and can never remember that my name is Rose. She likes lilacs and puppies and keeps calling me Poppy."
"Mmm. Poppy." The blonde chuckles, her voice rich with amusement and something sly that Rose can't quite name. "You are intoxicating."
"Oh, there you are, Rose." And he's back, almost vibrating. "Look, I know where we are, and it's a bad time to be here, we're three thousand years or more too late to do anything at all anyway--"
"What about her?"
"Who?"
"Her." Rose points at the blonde, then blinks, because she's gone like she never existed. "How odd. There was a woman there, Doctor. Blonde, tall..."
"Yes," he grabs her hand and tugs her back to the Tardis (which doesn't look so incongruous next to the bright green foliage and the paintbox-coloured sky), "well, I expect," there is a pause as he unlocks the door and steps in, pulling her inside, "she's a ghost."
"Ghosts don't exist." Rose objects, sticking to the facts as she knows them.
"No they don't. But you'd be surprised." The grin he shoots her is one she remembers. It's what first suckered her into this business in the first place. "Shall we?"
She smiles. "Lets."
"Damnit, Jack, I'm not taking your name."
"But, Spacemonkey--"
"I told you not to call me that!"
"I know how to make it all better."
"No. Jack, I'm not having sex with you."
"Daniel."
"Jack."
"Daniel!"
"Only if you take my name, too."
"Ok. Can we have sex now?"
"Yes."
Dude, Kara would SO do it. Because someone would say, "Bet you can't take them both" and she'd scoff, and they'd tell her to prove it. And she'd SO grin, "All right. So, Lee, I was wondering if you're free tonight?"
"Uh... Kara?"
"Well, Helo and I were going to do a little experimenting." (because as we all know, Helo's in it for the sex, and doesn't care who else is there. Although the CAG would give him pause)
"...experimenting."
"Yeah." She smirked, eyes widening in apparent innocence. "It's going to involve a little drinking."
"Kara."
"Lee."
He snorted and crossed his arms, "What are you really after?"
"Both of you."
"You--my gods. You're serious."
"As I'll ever be." The grin shifted, turned cajoling, "C'mon, Lee, what've you got to lose?"
He groaned and ran a hand through his hair. "Kara."
"It's just sex, Lee."
"All right." He gaped, disturbed to have agreed. "Fine."
"Fine." A giggle escaped her. "C'mon, Captain."
-=-
"Forgive me?"
Kara snorted, then gasped. "Maybe."
A snicker came from behind her and Helo's fingers slid down her back. "She's a hard one for forgiveness, Captain. May have to try harder."
"I'm," Lee grunted, "Trying as hard as I can."
She's been expecting this (she thinks she's always been expecting this from him). Don't do this. Don't push, Lee. But of course he has to.
Of course, he has to poke and prod until she's seeing red.
And it's at least an honest red that forces her into action, the arc of her punch beautiful before it impacts.
He hits back, and she slams into the bench.
And she thinks, Finally.
Now he knows how far she can be pushed. And she knows the same about him.
"It's a dog."
"I can see that, Major."
"It's a fluffy dog."
"You sound like you're trying to sell me something."
"Well..."
"I told you no pets, Sheppard."
"But, Weir, it's a dog. A cute dog."
"That dog doesn't belong in Atlantis. Take it back. Now."
"But Rodney's already promised Beckett and his people they could investigate it."
"No."
"But--"
"Major."
"Doctor."
"It. Goes. Back."
"They're going to kill it for food."
"..."
"We wouldn't have brought it, otherwise, but we couldn't just let it die."
"Ask Teyla if her people can take it."
"But--"
"Major, for all we know, this 'dog' is a vital meat animal. I should make you send it back."
"But you won't."
"No, but I am requiring that you turn it over to the Athoisans. And if they can't take it, it goes back."
"But--"
"You can visit Rover on your days off, Major."
"But I don't *have* days off!"
"Really?"
"Well, unless you're there."
"Major, I'm beginning to suspect--"
"Suspect? Dr. Weir, I don't know what you're thinking, but it's obvious that you have a dirty mind."
"Pot, kettle, Major."
"I never deny mine."
"Thank god for that."
"Hey! Sarcasm isn't nice."
"Go take your dog to Teyla, Major."
"Fine. See if I rub your back tonight."
"Guess you'll be sleeping alone, then."
"...y'know, I think I've reconsidered."
"Go, Major."
"Yes, doctor."
'Stay here, don't get into trouble.' Simple instructions from a complicated (and possibly insane) man. Rose accepts them and stays at the entrance to the ruins, already bored. The sky is bright, the plants are greener than anything outside of a Ground Force marathon, and the ruins might once have been interesting, but he hasn't bothered to explain.
"How intriguing." The voice comes from her right, and she turns and stares at the woman who stands there. "You're human."
"I'm sorry?" She's a little confused, a little disturbed. It's been two days, and this whole experience seems like a drug trip (not that she does drugs, she's a good little girl, after all). Rose is sure that in three weeks this will all seem perfectly normal to her, but right now, obscenely bright blue skies and ruins covered in moss aren't exactly Stonehenge.
The blonde slinks closer, her lips parting in a smile, her voice purrs as she says: "You're human. It's very... quaint."
Rose Tyler doesn't know a lot about the big universe outside her front door, but she does know that aliens aren't always a good commodity to discover. Especially when your current guide into the strange has kited off to do something he wouldn't bother to explain. She backs up a step, then stops. "Are you human?"
"The question is, 'Are you alive?'"
"Yes, of course I am. Are you mad? You're mad, aren't you? Like Mrs. Parsons who lives in 14b and can never remember that my name is Rose. She likes lilacs and puppies and keeps calling me Poppy."
"Mmm. Poppy." The blonde chuckles, her voice rich with amusement and something sly that Rose can't quite name. "You are intoxicating."
"Oh, there you are, Rose." And he's back, almost vibrating. "Look, I know where we are, and it's a bad time to be here, we're three thousand years or more too late to do anything at all anyway--"
"What about her?"
"Who?"
"Her." Rose points at the blonde, then blinks, because she's gone like she never existed. "How odd. There was a woman there, Doctor. Blonde, tall..."
"Yes," he grabs her hand and tugs her back to the Tardis (which doesn't look so incongruous next to the bright green foliage and the paintbox-coloured sky), "well, I expect," there is a pause as he unlocks the door and steps in, pulling her inside, "she's a ghost."
"Ghosts don't exist." Rose objects, sticking to the facts as she knows them.
"No they don't. But you'd be surprised." The grin he shoots her is one she remembers. It's what first suckered her into this business in the first place. "Shall we?"
She smiles. "Lets."