Vala fic for Alphabet Soup Day
disclaimer: not mine.
rating: PG, if that
genre: gen, character study
set: mid-season ten, I expect. It's more meandering than anything else.
length: 1000+
character: Vala, references the rest of SG-1
notes: this is for the Vala gen fic day alphabet soup. quick eta: My apologies if the phrasing isn't quite right. I've mainlined five series of Rumpole over the last two days.
U is for Uninvolved
by ALC Punk!
She doesn't do it, of course. Become involved. Vala skates on the thin ice of non-involvement, pretending that she is, and putting on a good show for everyone. She knows that getting involved means getting hurt, means letting people and places and things in. Allowing any of that is something that will lead to hurt, heartbreak, or her father disappearing on her again (what was it the last time, a con in the Aeon Sector that he swore up and down he'd had to run from, leaving her to pick up the pieces?).
That's why she flirts and laughs and teases on Earth, never quite getting involved until it's too late--until she realizes she wants to be involved and the not-being-involved feels wrong.
Standing shoulder to upper arm with Teal'c, stealing the basketball from Cameron, shopping with Samantha, annoying Daniel to distraction--that's what she's there for, but she wants more. She wants to feel pride in what she does and not just a rather mercenary pleasure at pulling the wool over yet another person's eyes.
It's a different sort of pride, she tells herself, as she fingers the patch that Cameron gave her. These aren't her people (not like the ones who worshiped Quetesh and still considered Vala their God while she was helpless to stop the Ori from killing them off), but they are her friends.
Perhaps that's of better value, in the long run.
None of which stops her facade. What's the use of having one, after all, if it isn't big as life and bright as day, always constant until it slips. Why, she could sneak out and leave in the morning and none of them would be the wiser.
Though she thinks, she hopes, they would care. That they would miss her as they went about their lives. She knows they would forget her in time--she's forgotten so much in such a short time, things which only swirl to the surface in nightmares (and that one time she was a waitress).
Of course, it's harder not to be involved when her own flesh and blood is intent on destroying the universe (re-writing it in her own image, which reminds Vala too much of the over-whelming need to control that the goa'uld had). Convincing Adria that being involved isn't a bad thing never seems to quite work, though.
Adria is involved, though in the wrong sort of way. Vala sometimes wonders how she would have grown up, had she been a normal child (no kid of hers would have been completely normal, of course).
She doesn't imagine what will happen once they've won (though she imagines winning, a ridiculous caricature of reality from too many bad movies at Teal'c's expense, her foot planted in Adria's back, her arms raised high in victory with some sort of blood-soaked weapon in one and a giant gold medallion in the other). Planning for the future only works when you believe you have one--and as much as she'd like to think they will, she's seen the power of the Ori, she knows too well how easily that sort of power can roll over even the strongest of people.
Which is why she doesn't let it get her down, and if it tries, she beats it into submission with distracting words or basketball games.
"Green jell-o," Vala informs Sam one day in the cafeteria, "is preferable and perfect."
Sam smiles, and waves her spoon filled with wobbly blue jell-o before replying, "It's not better, though."
"It's superior," asserts Vala.
They're off, then, embarking upon the most ridiculous argument Samantha Carter has probably ever participated in. Eventually, they come to a compromise, deciding that neither is entirely superior.
Cameron joins them as Sam is leaving, and Vala steals a french fry from his plate, gesturing as she spots Teal'c in the line as well, "Going so soon, Samantha?"
"I've got readings to analyze," she says, and if there's regret, it's colored with excitement for the data she has in her lab.
Vala leaves her to it, turning her ridiculous argument on Cameron, who looks confused. Teal'c, when he arrives, merely nods in agreement with her. Vala always did consider him smarter than the average human.
Later, she beards Daniel in his den, stealing the current tablet he's working on and making up a completely awful translation before sitting down on a stool and giving him the real one. It was best to do that before he went haring off to the General to tell him the Ori were made of green cheese. Not that Vala took him for that much of a fool, but the look on his face was still priceless.
They work until her stomach demands food, serious work, putting together more bits and pieces of goa'uld and Ori knowledge, some of which unsettles both of them.
Vala still feels her fingers itching, that need to travel more (staying in one place too long is dangerous, makes you traceable). She tells it to go away, knowing they have a mission in a few days. There are others she might be allowed to go out with (that didn't go so well the last time, though, and Col. Reynolds hadn't spoken to Col. Carter for nearly a week since it had been her suggestion), but none of them are her team.
Even as she considers that, she tries to convince herself that she doesn't do this. She doesn't get involved, she doesn't let herself be part of the team.
But following Carter with Teal'c behind them as they run for the gate, Daniel somewhere ahead, and Cameron off to the right in a flanking maneuver in case there's trouble, tells her that's a lie.
Sitting around a campfire, bickering over who has coffee duty or whether Daniel cooks worse than Cameron is something that feels right.
Curled up with Samantha at her back, the colonel sometimes joking that she doesn't miss Teal'c's snoring is so easy to get used to that Vala sometimes just lies there and listens as the others settle, as whomever is on watch begins a careful round of the edges of their clearing.
She's a part of things, she's slowly becoming a part of Earth's history (such as it is, with the history colored by whoever is in charge). Of course, no one will know about her if the records remain sealed forever. Someday, it will be another civilization that will be reading their tablets, deciphering their language and trying to put into words just what made them tick.
The thought always makes her feel a little alone. But then she'll find Sam in her lab, or Daniel, Cameron, Teal'c or half a dozen marines willing to play cards with her (only a few of those left), and she realizes she isn't alone.
Not truly. She's become involved against her better judgment.
-f-
rating: PG, if that
genre: gen, character study
set: mid-season ten, I expect. It's more meandering than anything else.
length: 1000+
character: Vala, references the rest of SG-1
notes: this is for the Vala gen fic day alphabet soup. quick eta: My apologies if the phrasing isn't quite right. I've mainlined five series of Rumpole over the last two days.
U is for Uninvolved
by ALC Punk!
She doesn't do it, of course. Become involved. Vala skates on the thin ice of non-involvement, pretending that she is, and putting on a good show for everyone. She knows that getting involved means getting hurt, means letting people and places and things in. Allowing any of that is something that will lead to hurt, heartbreak, or her father disappearing on her again (what was it the last time, a con in the Aeon Sector that he swore up and down he'd had to run from, leaving her to pick up the pieces?).
That's why she flirts and laughs and teases on Earth, never quite getting involved until it's too late--until she realizes she wants to be involved and the not-being-involved feels wrong.
Standing shoulder to upper arm with Teal'c, stealing the basketball from Cameron, shopping with Samantha, annoying Daniel to distraction--that's what she's there for, but she wants more. She wants to feel pride in what she does and not just a rather mercenary pleasure at pulling the wool over yet another person's eyes.
It's a different sort of pride, she tells herself, as she fingers the patch that Cameron gave her. These aren't her people (not like the ones who worshiped Quetesh and still considered Vala their God while she was helpless to stop the Ori from killing them off), but they are her friends.
Perhaps that's of better value, in the long run.
None of which stops her facade. What's the use of having one, after all, if it isn't big as life and bright as day, always constant until it slips. Why, she could sneak out and leave in the morning and none of them would be the wiser.
Though she thinks, she hopes, they would care. That they would miss her as they went about their lives. She knows they would forget her in time--she's forgotten so much in such a short time, things which only swirl to the surface in nightmares (and that one time she was a waitress).
Of course, it's harder not to be involved when her own flesh and blood is intent on destroying the universe (re-writing it in her own image, which reminds Vala too much of the over-whelming need to control that the goa'uld had). Convincing Adria that being involved isn't a bad thing never seems to quite work, though.
Adria is involved, though in the wrong sort of way. Vala sometimes wonders how she would have grown up, had she been a normal child (no kid of hers would have been completely normal, of course).
She doesn't imagine what will happen once they've won (though she imagines winning, a ridiculous caricature of reality from too many bad movies at Teal'c's expense, her foot planted in Adria's back, her arms raised high in victory with some sort of blood-soaked weapon in one and a giant gold medallion in the other). Planning for the future only works when you believe you have one--and as much as she'd like to think they will, she's seen the power of the Ori, she knows too well how easily that sort of power can roll over even the strongest of people.
Which is why she doesn't let it get her down, and if it tries, she beats it into submission with distracting words or basketball games.
"Green jell-o," Vala informs Sam one day in the cafeteria, "is preferable and perfect."
Sam smiles, and waves her spoon filled with wobbly blue jell-o before replying, "It's not better, though."
"It's superior," asserts Vala.
They're off, then, embarking upon the most ridiculous argument Samantha Carter has probably ever participated in. Eventually, they come to a compromise, deciding that neither is entirely superior.
Cameron joins them as Sam is leaving, and Vala steals a french fry from his plate, gesturing as she spots Teal'c in the line as well, "Going so soon, Samantha?"
"I've got readings to analyze," she says, and if there's regret, it's colored with excitement for the data she has in her lab.
Vala leaves her to it, turning her ridiculous argument on Cameron, who looks confused. Teal'c, when he arrives, merely nods in agreement with her. Vala always did consider him smarter than the average human.
Later, she beards Daniel in his den, stealing the current tablet he's working on and making up a completely awful translation before sitting down on a stool and giving him the real one. It was best to do that before he went haring off to the General to tell him the Ori were made of green cheese. Not that Vala took him for that much of a fool, but the look on his face was still priceless.
They work until her stomach demands food, serious work, putting together more bits and pieces of goa'uld and Ori knowledge, some of which unsettles both of them.
Vala still feels her fingers itching, that need to travel more (staying in one place too long is dangerous, makes you traceable). She tells it to go away, knowing they have a mission in a few days. There are others she might be allowed to go out with (that didn't go so well the last time, though, and Col. Reynolds hadn't spoken to Col. Carter for nearly a week since it had been her suggestion), but none of them are her team.
Even as she considers that, she tries to convince herself that she doesn't do this. She doesn't get involved, she doesn't let herself be part of the team.
But following Carter with Teal'c behind them as they run for the gate, Daniel somewhere ahead, and Cameron off to the right in a flanking maneuver in case there's trouble, tells her that's a lie.
Sitting around a campfire, bickering over who has coffee duty or whether Daniel cooks worse than Cameron is something that feels right.
Curled up with Samantha at her back, the colonel sometimes joking that she doesn't miss Teal'c's snoring is so easy to get used to that Vala sometimes just lies there and listens as the others settle, as whomever is on watch begins a careful round of the edges of their clearing.
She's a part of things, she's slowly becoming a part of Earth's history (such as it is, with the history colored by whoever is in charge). Of course, no one will know about her if the records remain sealed forever. Someday, it will be another civilization that will be reading their tablets, deciphering their language and trying to put into words just what made them tick.
The thought always makes her feel a little alone. But then she'll find Sam in her lab, or Daniel, Cameron, Teal'c or half a dozen marines willing to play cards with her (only a few of those left), and she realizes she isn't alone.
Not truly. She's become involved against her better judgment.
-f-