spamming my f-list with more words
for a while I thought I was the princess // tvd, caroline-centric // written for the multi_genfic bingo fill “free indirect discourse” which I hopefully figured out correctly. I did at least look it up I promise.
In the fairytales the princess falls into a deep sleep (chokes on the apple, pricks her hand on the spindle) and when she awakes the nightmare is over.
She is happy.
Your life is not a fairytale.
You did not eat the apple and your finger never pricked a needle. Instead there was a pillow and then there was no air. And then there was nothing at all.
Caroline Forbes forever frozen in time (and she will be forever, forever seventeen, forever that girl in a hospital gown, forever that girl who wanted everything) and only time will wake her up.
There is no prince, there is no kiss, there is no magic.
You wake up and you are not a princess. You are a monster. You are a dragon. You are everything you fear.
Funny, how you always thought fairytales were based on truth. That they were something tangible within them, something that maybe someday you could reach. If you just reached high enough, if the right moment came.
(I want to be a princess, Caroline tells her daddy and he laughs. But he smiles and tells her she can be anything she wants to be.
Later he will tell her she will never be okay because she is a vampire. Later, he will be the villain in her story trying to change who she is, the feared villager who tries to change what can’t be changed.
Later, everything will be different.)
You wake up and everything is different.
Caroline Forbes does not become a princess, she will never become a queen, she will only look onto her friend and want something she can never have.
She will look to her friends and see everything she cannot have.
Elena can be the princess and Bonnie can be the fairy-godmother and Caroline can be the-
This is not a fairytale.
Life is not a fairytale.
(Fairytales are horror stories, Caroline will say and she will clench her jaw, I don’t get why anyone would want to be in one. Nothing good ever happens.
What about the happy endings? Elena, the very human Elena will ask.
Endings only happen when you die. What’s so happy about that? Caroline will respond.
Bonnie and Elena will share a look.
Caroline will remember that she is already dead.)
picked a name out of a book // btvs, faith-centric // written for the multi_genfic bingo fill for “repetition”. I wanted to try to play with new characters for this, so I tried Faith. Here goes.
Her mother named her Faith which ended up being even more ironic than most predicted. She didn’t have faith in anything at all.
When the Watcher appeared on her doorstep, her mother sleeping off her latest bender and Faith in her short shorts and no bra under her shirt, and she had laughed and laughed.
“You must have faith.” The woman had said, “You must believe-some part of you must know that I’m telling you the truth.”
“Yeah, I thinking you’re getting your facts confused.” She smiled, “My name is Faith, doesn’t mean I actually have any of it. Save that for some more gullible kid who wants to join your weird-ass cult.”
And then she slammed the door in her face.
Of course it all went to hell after that. When actual vampires, actual real vampires, showed up and life changed.
It was almost good for a little while, she moved in with her Watcher, learned how to kick ass and some other more boring stuff, And how not to break a door by slamming it too hard behind her. Or at least not on purpose anyway.
But then her Watcher was dead and she was still alive and running seemed like the only thing to do when she was being chased by the thing that killed the only person that had given a damn about her. When she had clothes splattered with her blood.
So she ran.
That’s what you do when the world proves you right. When faith is just another word like any other one.
When Faith was just her name and nothing more than an irony.
Because faith, faith was just something missing from her soul. She didn’t believe in the grand design and she didn’t believe that there were people out there looking out for her or anyone else. She didn’t believe that people got what they deserved. (She knew a string of men that would have been struck dead and a Watcher that would still be alive if any of that crap was true.)
Cause see, her mother named her Faith, but it ended up being more ironic than most thought.
room whats? // btvs, buffy+cordy college AU // written for the multi_genfic bingo fill “dialogue”. There’s lots of other wordy-ness, but the meat of this is the dialogue they have.
“Seriously, you?”
Neither of them were really sure which one of them said it, or if they had both said it at the same time. All Buffy knew was that one minute she was unpacking boxes in her dorm room with her mother, when suddenly Cordelia was there.
When their eyes connected, Buffy was sure there was nothing but horror there.
Cordelia hadn’t enjoyed it anymore, she had spent the better part of the morning setting up her side of the room and she was sure Buffy would somehow mess it up. She was also sure that somehow because she was the Slayer, Buffy would be a reason that a vampire showed up sometime soon.
And the worst part was that both Buffy’s mom (“I know you two don’t know each other very well, and she can be a bit…difficult, but it’s good that you already know your roommate. You’ll have plenty of time to meet other new people.”) and Giles (“Really, Cordelia? I heard she had been accepted to Duke…Well either way, she might be your best possibility for a roommate all things considered. You won’t have to sneak out or come up with excuses when you patrol.”) both thought it was a great idea.
Like possibly the greatest idea ever.
And they were sure to express how much they thought Buffy should make sure that it worked out. That they find a way to actually be friends and not just…Cordelia and Buffy, fellow students and former Scooby members/fighters of evil.
“So…do you have all your books already?” Buffy asked from her bed, trying to make friendly but neutral conversation.
“Mostly, I guess.” Cordelia said eyeing her a bit oddly, “There’s a couple of classes that I’m considering that I don’t want to buy the books for if I don’t take them.”
“But you can just sell them back right? You can sell them back?” She asked suddenly worried. She wasn’t technically signed up for that pop culture class yet but she had bought everything that she needed for it.
“Technically, but for less money. Once they leave the store, they’re considered used. Even if they weren’t.”
“That seems dumb.”
“That’s what I told the guy at the counter. He just called me cheap. Can you believe that? Me, Cordelia Chase, cheap?”
“No, your right the words don’t go together in my head.” Buffy said, though she knew if Xander was there he would find a way to make a comment about her and cheap being in the same sentence. But then it was best not to go there.
“See, even you get it.” She said, “Besides I don’t see what the big deal is. I mean what’s wrong with wanting all your money back. It’s guaranteed at all the good stores.”
“With the good shoes.” Buffy added.
“I miss shoe shopping.” Cordelia sighed.
“What?”
“Nothing, I, nothing…just shoes. I would totally ace a class on shoes.” She covered.
“I would take that class.” Buffy nodded, “In fact I think you should suggest it to them.”
“If they won’t let me get a full refund, somehow I doubt they’ll let me create classes.” Cordelia said, eyebrow raised.
She moved, already in her pajamas, putting some of the pillows from her bed on the floor so she could sleep.
“So…” Buffy said.
“Yeah?” Cordelia said turning towards her.
“That was like an actual conversation. Between the two of us. One where threats and insults didn’t come into play.” Buffy said, “That’s…new.”
“Yeah, I guess it is.”
“You think this living together thing could work out?” She asked.
Cordelia paused, a pillow in her hand, “Stranger things have happened.”
“And we’re on a Hellmouth, so really, the odds that we were going to end up with demon roommates…high.”
“Also true.” Cordelia nodded.
“So…”
“Yeah, I think this whole roommate thing could work out.” She said before finally reaching out and turning off her light and settling into bed.
“Besides,” She said a few minutes later, “Like you said, we’re on a Hellmouth, having a Slayer as a roommate, could totally come in handy.”
“Glad to be of service.” Buffy said dryly.
“Hey, I’m just saying. Besides now that everything happened, you’ll need someone to be book girl. I can do that. You know when I’m not in classes.”
“I’ll tell Giles he has his latest recruit.” Buffy smiled in the dark.
It was weird, and she knew it wasn’t always going to be like this. Tomorrow they’d probably be fighting over who stole who’s sweater. But for now, maybe it could be okay. And maybe, after some time, there wouldn’t even be sweater fighting at all.
In the fairytales the princess falls into a deep sleep (chokes on the apple, pricks her hand on the spindle) and when she awakes the nightmare is over.
She is happy.
Your life is not a fairytale.
You did not eat the apple and your finger never pricked a needle. Instead there was a pillow and then there was no air. And then there was nothing at all.
Caroline Forbes forever frozen in time (and she will be forever, forever seventeen, forever that girl in a hospital gown, forever that girl who wanted everything) and only time will wake her up.
There is no prince, there is no kiss, there is no magic.
You wake up and you are not a princess. You are a monster. You are a dragon. You are everything you fear.
Funny, how you always thought fairytales were based on truth. That they were something tangible within them, something that maybe someday you could reach. If you just reached high enough, if the right moment came.
(I want to be a princess, Caroline tells her daddy and he laughs. But he smiles and tells her she can be anything she wants to be.
Later he will tell her she will never be okay because she is a vampire. Later, he will be the villain in her story trying to change who she is, the feared villager who tries to change what can’t be changed.
Later, everything will be different.)
You wake up and everything is different.
Caroline Forbes does not become a princess, she will never become a queen, she will only look onto her friend and want something she can never have.
She will look to her friends and see everything she cannot have.
Elena can be the princess and Bonnie can be the fairy-godmother and Caroline can be the-
This is not a fairytale.
Life is not a fairytale.
(Fairytales are horror stories, Caroline will say and she will clench her jaw, I don’t get why anyone would want to be in one. Nothing good ever happens.
What about the happy endings? Elena, the very human Elena will ask.
Endings only happen when you die. What’s so happy about that? Caroline will respond.
Bonnie and Elena will share a look.
Caroline will remember that she is already dead.)
picked a name out of a book // btvs, faith-centric // written for the multi_genfic bingo fill for “repetition”. I wanted to try to play with new characters for this, so I tried Faith. Here goes.
Her mother named her Faith which ended up being even more ironic than most predicted. She didn’t have faith in anything at all.
When the Watcher appeared on her doorstep, her mother sleeping off her latest bender and Faith in her short shorts and no bra under her shirt, and she had laughed and laughed.
“You must have faith.” The woman had said, “You must believe-some part of you must know that I’m telling you the truth.”
“Yeah, I thinking you’re getting your facts confused.” She smiled, “My name is Faith, doesn’t mean I actually have any of it. Save that for some more gullible kid who wants to join your weird-ass cult.”
And then she slammed the door in her face.
Of course it all went to hell after that. When actual vampires, actual real vampires, showed up and life changed.
It was almost good for a little while, she moved in with her Watcher, learned how to kick ass and some other more boring stuff, And how not to break a door by slamming it too hard behind her. Or at least not on purpose anyway.
But then her Watcher was dead and she was still alive and running seemed like the only thing to do when she was being chased by the thing that killed the only person that had given a damn about her. When she had clothes splattered with her blood.
So she ran.
That’s what you do when the world proves you right. When faith is just another word like any other one.
When Faith was just her name and nothing more than an irony.
Because faith, faith was just something missing from her soul. She didn’t believe in the grand design and she didn’t believe that there were people out there looking out for her or anyone else. She didn’t believe that people got what they deserved. (She knew a string of men that would have been struck dead and a Watcher that would still be alive if any of that crap was true.)
Cause see, her mother named her Faith, but it ended up being more ironic than most thought.
room whats? // btvs, buffy+cordy college AU // written for the multi_genfic bingo fill “dialogue”. There’s lots of other wordy-ness, but the meat of this is the dialogue they have.
“Seriously, you?”
Neither of them were really sure which one of them said it, or if they had both said it at the same time. All Buffy knew was that one minute she was unpacking boxes in her dorm room with her mother, when suddenly Cordelia was there.
When their eyes connected, Buffy was sure there was nothing but horror there.
Cordelia hadn’t enjoyed it anymore, she had spent the better part of the morning setting up her side of the room and she was sure Buffy would somehow mess it up. She was also sure that somehow because she was the Slayer, Buffy would be a reason that a vampire showed up sometime soon.
And the worst part was that both Buffy’s mom (“I know you two don’t know each other very well, and she can be a bit…difficult, but it’s good that you already know your roommate. You’ll have plenty of time to meet other new people.”) and Giles (“Really, Cordelia? I heard she had been accepted to Duke…Well either way, she might be your best possibility for a roommate all things considered. You won’t have to sneak out or come up with excuses when you patrol.”) both thought it was a great idea.
Like possibly the greatest idea ever.
And they were sure to express how much they thought Buffy should make sure that it worked out. That they find a way to actually be friends and not just…Cordelia and Buffy, fellow students and former Scooby members/fighters of evil.
“So…do you have all your books already?” Buffy asked from her bed, trying to make friendly but neutral conversation.
“Mostly, I guess.” Cordelia said eyeing her a bit oddly, “There’s a couple of classes that I’m considering that I don’t want to buy the books for if I don’t take them.”
“But you can just sell them back right? You can sell them back?” She asked suddenly worried. She wasn’t technically signed up for that pop culture class yet but she had bought everything that she needed for it.
“Technically, but for less money. Once they leave the store, they’re considered used. Even if they weren’t.”
“That seems dumb.”
“That’s what I told the guy at the counter. He just called me cheap. Can you believe that? Me, Cordelia Chase, cheap?”
“No, your right the words don’t go together in my head.” Buffy said, though she knew if Xander was there he would find a way to make a comment about her and cheap being in the same sentence. But then it was best not to go there.
“See, even you get it.” She said, “Besides I don’t see what the big deal is. I mean what’s wrong with wanting all your money back. It’s guaranteed at all the good stores.”
“With the good shoes.” Buffy added.
“I miss shoe shopping.” Cordelia sighed.
“What?”
“Nothing, I, nothing…just shoes. I would totally ace a class on shoes.” She covered.
“I would take that class.” Buffy nodded, “In fact I think you should suggest it to them.”
“If they won’t let me get a full refund, somehow I doubt they’ll let me create classes.” Cordelia said, eyebrow raised.
She moved, already in her pajamas, putting some of the pillows from her bed on the floor so she could sleep.
“So…” Buffy said.
“Yeah?” Cordelia said turning towards her.
“That was like an actual conversation. Between the two of us. One where threats and insults didn’t come into play.” Buffy said, “That’s…new.”
“Yeah, I guess it is.”
“You think this living together thing could work out?” She asked.
Cordelia paused, a pillow in her hand, “Stranger things have happened.”
“And we’re on a Hellmouth, so really, the odds that we were going to end up with demon roommates…high.”
“Also true.” Cordelia nodded.
“So…”
“Yeah, I think this whole roommate thing could work out.” She said before finally reaching out and turning off her light and settling into bed.
“Besides,” She said a few minutes later, “Like you said, we’re on a Hellmouth, having a Slayer as a roommate, could totally come in handy.”
“Glad to be of service.” Buffy said dryly.
“Hey, I’m just saying. Besides now that everything happened, you’ll need someone to be book girl. I can do that. You know when I’m not in classes.”
“I’ll tell Giles he has his latest recruit.” Buffy smiled in the dark.
It was weird, and she knew it wasn’t always going to be like this. Tomorrow they’d probably be fighting over who stole who’s sweater. But for now, maybe it could be okay. And maybe, after some time, there wouldn’t even be sweater fighting at all.