I am totally going vegetarian....

[lynsey]

I totally cannot cook. I just never learned the basic skills required to be a cook. I know my mother never had the patience to teach me, so I have had to rely on others to teach me how to cook. Usually, the "others" have been boyfriends.

With Trevor being up here for graduation this weekend, I found myself trying to plan meals that were more intense than a frozen Amy's organic microwave dinner. Trevor chose to buy a bunch of chicken, and he plotted out meals for the two of us to cook together. The first and only meal was some chicken alfredo. Trevor trimmed the chicken diligently, and tossed the leftover bits in the trash. He grilled the chicken on my Foreman grill, and added it to the sauce. It was an incredible meal.

However, when I came home tonight, my apartment had a horrible smell. It was kind of mildewy, except far more putrid. I walked further into my apartment and realized it was coming from the kitchen. I nearly vomited when I stood near the trash can. I grabbed the liner and ran out to the dumpster, gagging the whole way. I nearly knelt over and vomited in the dumpster from the horrible stench of the rotten chicken.

And that, my friends, is why you may never again see me eat meat.