Brief return
I haven't been around LJ in a while because I've had so much personal stuff to deal with but I wanted to let y'all know something.
Last night, Charm, our first & oldest 4-legged baby, had a seizure. We have no idea why but she's been under the weather lately. Last night, for a while, she didn't know her name, didn't know me or Jason, and didn't know where she was. Since then. she's had a number of mini/micro-seizures. She had another bad seizure a little while ago but not as bad as the one last night.
So, after watching her all of last night and again all of today once Jason got home, talking about her quality of life at length, realizing that she's 14 years old, has lost most of her teeth, has had a very, very rough life, more talking with Momma, research about what could be wrong with our old girl, petting her, loving on her, and cuddling with her, we've decided to take her to the vet in the morning.
We've decided it's Time.
My heart is breaking, I'm constantly in tears, and I don't think I've been this sad in a very long time. Charm is the first dog Jason & I got after we handfasted. We've had her for 6 years. She was there for me the night I got hurt and laid in bed crying my eyes out. Charm was eagerly waiting for me to come home from the hospital after my back surgery. She's my precious angel and I can't imagine not having her quirky little smile greet me when I wake up in the morning, come in from running errands, or cuddle up with me when Jason leaves for work at night.
Charm is my angel. She's my little miracle. She's such a little fighter, always has been. She taught me that being a momma doesn't mean you have to have an actual baby. She's been a momma to me, even though she's a dog, as much as I've been her momma. We've both survived all sorts of curves life has thrown at us and we're still standing. Neither of us ever got to have a child of our own.
So we're going to the vet in the morning as soon as Jason gets home from work. I'm hoping that Dr. Mike (our vet) can help us hold off on It until Mom gets here Wednesday because she wants to be able to be there with her and to say goodbye. As much as I hope we can wait, I doubt very seriously that we can. If Charm is in any kind of pain, I won't let her suffer any longer than she has to. I can't let my baby go through that. I promised her, when we brought her home all those years ago, that I'd never let her suffer ever again.
I also promised her I'd never let her go anywhere scary without me. Well, I can only be there with her This Time to an extent but I will be. No matter how much it hurts, I will be in The Room with her, holding her paw, and telling her how much I love her and how much she means to me until...
And, when The Time comes, Daddy has asked that we bring her home to his house so she can stay with Sable, Marius, Mouse, Ace, Wilbur, Junior, Spud, and all the puppies they've lost since they started breeding the huskies.
So I would greatly appreciate any and all thoughts and prayers tonight and tomorrow. I'll make sure to let y'all know what happens tomorrow or if we can wait until Mom gets here on Wednesday.
I just realized that Wednesday's my birthday. *sigh*
Anybody who was at the wedding and took pictures, if y'all have any pictures of Charmy, can y'all send them to me? I'm working on a tribute to her.
Okay I'm going to take my sweet baby to bed and see if I can get her to rest. She's been pretty restless the past 24+ hours.
Last night, Charm, our first & oldest 4-legged baby, had a seizure. We have no idea why but she's been under the weather lately. Last night, for a while, she didn't know her name, didn't know me or Jason, and didn't know where she was. Since then. she's had a number of mini/micro-seizures. She had another bad seizure a little while ago but not as bad as the one last night.
So, after watching her all of last night and again all of today once Jason got home, talking about her quality of life at length, realizing that she's 14 years old, has lost most of her teeth, has had a very, very rough life, more talking with Momma, research about what could be wrong with our old girl, petting her, loving on her, and cuddling with her, we've decided to take her to the vet in the morning.
We've decided it's Time.
My heart is breaking, I'm constantly in tears, and I don't think I've been this sad in a very long time. Charm is the first dog Jason & I got after we handfasted. We've had her for 6 years. She was there for me the night I got hurt and laid in bed crying my eyes out. Charm was eagerly waiting for me to come home from the hospital after my back surgery. She's my precious angel and I can't imagine not having her quirky little smile greet me when I wake up in the morning, come in from running errands, or cuddle up with me when Jason leaves for work at night.
Charm is my angel. She's my little miracle. She's such a little fighter, always has been. She taught me that being a momma doesn't mean you have to have an actual baby. She's been a momma to me, even though she's a dog, as much as I've been her momma. We've both survived all sorts of curves life has thrown at us and we're still standing. Neither of us ever got to have a child of our own.
So we're going to the vet in the morning as soon as Jason gets home from work. I'm hoping that Dr. Mike (our vet) can help us hold off on It until Mom gets here Wednesday because she wants to be able to be there with her and to say goodbye. As much as I hope we can wait, I doubt very seriously that we can. If Charm is in any kind of pain, I won't let her suffer any longer than she has to. I can't let my baby go through that. I promised her, when we brought her home all those years ago, that I'd never let her suffer ever again.
I also promised her I'd never let her go anywhere scary without me. Well, I can only be there with her This Time to an extent but I will be. No matter how much it hurts, I will be in The Room with her, holding her paw, and telling her how much I love her and how much she means to me until...
And, when The Time comes, Daddy has asked that we bring her home to his house so she can stay with Sable, Marius, Mouse, Ace, Wilbur, Junior, Spud, and all the puppies they've lost since they started breeding the huskies.
So I would greatly appreciate any and all thoughts and prayers tonight and tomorrow. I'll make sure to let y'all know what happens tomorrow or if we can wait until Mom gets here on Wednesday.
I just realized that Wednesday's my birthday. *sigh*
Anybody who was at the wedding and took pictures, if y'all have any pictures of Charmy, can y'all send them to me? I'm working on a tribute to her.
Okay I'm going to take my sweet baby to bed and see if I can get her to rest. She's been pretty restless the past 24+ hours.