I'm a lover not a fighter......
So the night after my last entry, David picked me up after he got off work and just as I predicted, the topic that had gotten me so heated the night before never came up. We have no money so we couldn't celebrate V-Day. I guess I was emotional because our discussion the night before and the fact that on V-Day we couldn't do anything, plus on all days when one should be sweet and romantic with their significant other, he snapped at me over the dumbest thing, his computer. And to top it all off, I've been sick for a month now, litterally. So with all that in mind, I started crying yesterday after we got back to his moms house. It wasn't an all-out weepfest or anything, just some little tears that got away, but he noticed.
I'm the kind of person that when I'm a little upset, if you ask me what's wrong, I just lose it. I hate that about myself. And he gets frustrated with me when I'm obviously upset but saying nothing when he asks what's wrong. Of course he knows better. The only thing I managed to say was, " I'm tired of being sick"...which made him laugh. I guess I just looked so pathetic it was funny. I wanted to make love to him so bad that night, but by the time I had gotten to bed, he was out cold....and I mean fucking OUT. Why is it that when a guy wakes up in the middle of the night and wants something, he doesn't stop until he gets it no matter how unrelenting you are, but when a girl does it, she doesn't get the same response? At least I don't anyway. He grumbles and says I'm tired and have to be up early for work, I love you but not tonight. So for V-Day I got him a card. Nothing much , just a simple card to say I love you. What did I get? Nothing. No card, no flowers.... Not even sex. How much suck does that suck?Yes I meant to say it like that.
But he did make up for it this morning, and all throughout the day, in case you were wondering.
I came back to my mom's tonight, after spending just one night with him this week, which is dreadfully hard considering we had lived together for a year. I will be going back to his place tomorrow until Monday, which will be some nice time together I hope. We are going to a birthday party Friday that has a toga theme...should be interesting.
Something else I just thought of. On New Years eve of this year I met a girl that David worked with named Amy. He had made jokes in the past about having a girl on the side named Amy. Well I met her that night. Turns out she's really fun to hang out with. I found out a couple nights ago, the same night he and I had that talk and I got pissed at him, she has had a crush on him for some time. She told me this. I find that....odd. Why would my friend tell me she has a crush on my fiance? Does she have some underlined reason that I'm not picking up on? Or did she just tell me that to reassure me that even though she likes him, she respects me enough to not only tell me, but tell me she feels bad about that and wants me to know that she will never try to interfere with our relationship? Should I continue to be friends with her? Should I be on the lookout and watch my back? I dunno....what do you guys think?
I'm the kind of person that when I'm a little upset, if you ask me what's wrong, I just lose it. I hate that about myself. And he gets frustrated with me when I'm obviously upset but saying nothing when he asks what's wrong. Of course he knows better. The only thing I managed to say was, " I'm tired of being sick"...which made him laugh. I guess I just looked so pathetic it was funny. I wanted to make love to him so bad that night, but by the time I had gotten to bed, he was out cold....and I mean fucking OUT. Why is it that when a guy wakes up in the middle of the night and wants something, he doesn't stop until he gets it no matter how unrelenting you are, but when a girl does it, she doesn't get the same response? At least I don't anyway. He grumbles and says I'm tired and have to be up early for work, I love you but not tonight. So for V-Day I got him a card. Nothing much , just a simple card to say I love you. What did I get? Nothing. No card, no flowers.... Not even sex. How much suck does that suck?Yes I meant to say it like that.
But he did make up for it this morning, and all throughout the day, in case you were wondering.
I came back to my mom's tonight, after spending just one night with him this week, which is dreadfully hard considering we had lived together for a year. I will be going back to his place tomorrow until Monday, which will be some nice time together I hope. We are going to a birthday party Friday that has a toga theme...should be interesting.
Something else I just thought of. On New Years eve of this year I met a girl that David worked with named Amy. He had made jokes in the past about having a girl on the side named Amy. Well I met her that night. Turns out she's really fun to hang out with. I found out a couple nights ago, the same night he and I had that talk and I got pissed at him, she has had a crush on him for some time. She told me this. I find that....odd. Why would my friend tell me she has a crush on my fiance? Does she have some underlined reason that I'm not picking up on? Or did she just tell me that to reassure me that even though she likes him, she respects me enough to not only tell me, but tell me she feels bad about that and wants me to know that she will never try to interfere with our relationship? Should I continue to be friends with her? Should I be on the lookout and watch my back? I dunno....what do you guys think?