same as it never was (image HEAVY)
i have been such a bad blogger lately, i just don't have the energy and of course i am super behind on ready all of your blogs (i have close to 200!) and they get out of hand quickly. i hate it. it makes me feel guilty, as stupid as i know that is. it is really hard to decide if i should try to catch up on blogs or draw, read, etc, etc, etc. mainly, i have had lots of headaches and have been just pushing to get as much done as i can and i feel a bit like i am just treading water. you know?
i have been having lots of nightmares, like usual, i don't understand them because they are so complex. they tend to be set on college campuses, sometimes i am taking classes, sometimes it is just there. several dreams have had fish in them which were cut off at the tail, but were not killed. no idea what that means. and almost always, i am being chased and attacked or threatened and am often attempting to protect another person or animal. sigh.
i was sketching one night and kept falling asleep, and kind of woke up and wrote down what i was dreaming, my writing is so bad that it is hard to read:
all of my
old clothes
cried out to
me-all the different
faceless me's
w/their different
cute (?) self(?) & hairstyles
drowning (?) ?????
like the
one in the patternless fashions
and then a really odd scribbly drawing of two people. um. no clue. but i do remember sort of seeing all the different versions of myself over the years all together. in the book patternless fashions, which was originally written in china, there are fantastic illustrations fromt hat time with faceless people with cute clothes and hairstyles, so i assume that is what i was talking about? dunno.
jake had some sort of 24 hour flu yesterday and i think i had sympathy flu. i kept falling asleep throughout the day, but really asleep, not just a nap. poor jake felt sick when he got up at 3a and went to work anyway and came home at 8 am and was either in the bathroom (powdering his nose, hee.) or totally conked out and coverd in sweat or goosebumps. he is the type of person that eats every hour or two or gets, as i call it, "hangry" which is angry and hungry, although the low blood sugar makes him feel legitimately angry. you know? so he was very dizzy as well, which may have been from the flu or lack of eating. he normally has a rather healthy, ruddy complexion and was literally green. he always has very red lips and they were pale. it is odd to see him sick because he never gets sick. anyway, pavel wanted to cuddle with his papa and take care of him, which is extra sweet because he is not that way. wanna see?
poor boy.
otherwise, i have done a good bit of spinning and dyeing. i really need to finish some mixed media boxes and other things. i feel very annoyed with myself that i haven't made the time. here is some of what i have been working on...
i have some lovely yarns i need to take photos of, as well. i have been dyeing felt, which will be for sale. the deeper colored ones are 100% wool felt, and the rest is wool and rayon blend, which feels much nicer and looks rather pretty, i must say. i will be listing some soon. so pretty. and i realized really quickly that it is impossible to find unusual colors of felt that is of any kind of quality and ti get handdyed felt...forget it. i keep meaning to make felt myself, but with my energy issues, it just doesn't seem realistic.
my mom will be in town for a few days, coming in to-morrow. i hope to get work done this week regardless becase we are leaving this coming weekend for the beach. wooo hoooo!
okay, i am getting super sleepy.
xo
n.
i have been having lots of nightmares, like usual, i don't understand them because they are so complex. they tend to be set on college campuses, sometimes i am taking classes, sometimes it is just there. several dreams have had fish in them which were cut off at the tail, but were not killed. no idea what that means. and almost always, i am being chased and attacked or threatened and am often attempting to protect another person or animal. sigh.
i was sketching one night and kept falling asleep, and kind of woke up and wrote down what i was dreaming, my writing is so bad that it is hard to read:
all of my
old clothes
cried out to
me-all the different
faceless me's
w/their different
cute (?) self(?) & hairstyles
drowning (?) ?????
like the
one in the patternless fashions
and then a really odd scribbly drawing of two people. um. no clue. but i do remember sort of seeing all the different versions of myself over the years all together. in the book patternless fashions, which was originally written in china, there are fantastic illustrations fromt hat time with faceless people with cute clothes and hairstyles, so i assume that is what i was talking about? dunno.
jake had some sort of 24 hour flu yesterday and i think i had sympathy flu. i kept falling asleep throughout the day, but really asleep, not just a nap. poor jake felt sick when he got up at 3a and went to work anyway and came home at 8 am and was either in the bathroom (powdering his nose, hee.) or totally conked out and coverd in sweat or goosebumps. he is the type of person that eats every hour or two or gets, as i call it, "hangry" which is angry and hungry, although the low blood sugar makes him feel legitimately angry. you know? so he was very dizzy as well, which may have been from the flu or lack of eating. he normally has a rather healthy, ruddy complexion and was literally green. he always has very red lips and they were pale. it is odd to see him sick because he never gets sick. anyway, pavel wanted to cuddle with his papa and take care of him, which is extra sweet because he is not that way. wanna see?
poor boy.
otherwise, i have done a good bit of spinning and dyeing. i really need to finish some mixed media boxes and other things. i feel very annoyed with myself that i haven't made the time. here is some of what i have been working on...
i have some lovely yarns i need to take photos of, as well. i have been dyeing felt, which will be for sale. the deeper colored ones are 100% wool felt, and the rest is wool and rayon blend, which feels much nicer and looks rather pretty, i must say. i will be listing some soon. so pretty. and i realized really quickly that it is impossible to find unusual colors of felt that is of any kind of quality and ti get handdyed felt...forget it. i keep meaning to make felt myself, but with my energy issues, it just doesn't seem realistic.
my mom will be in town for a few days, coming in to-morrow. i hope to get work done this week regardless becase we are leaving this coming weekend for the beach. wooo hoooo!
okay, i am getting super sleepy.
xo
n.