i want food
So since work is slow and I'm way single and I have time on my hands I think I'm going to go ahead back to my old pass time of completely obsessing about my weight, haha.
I really do need to get more exercise and eat better though. It's a matter of feeling good in general. I don't know why I let this thing I want so bad that is totally within my control slip away from me so easily time and time again.
Today I took the dog on a long walk around the neighborhood. There is nothing really inspiring about this neighborhood so it kinda sucks. But anyway, I realize the one thing really pissing me off about my apartment, is the neighbor downstairs creeps me the fuck out. I need a to find a guy or something to come in and out of my apartment rather visibly a couple times a week or something so it looks like I have someone available to kick his ass if he ever tries anything.
Or maybe I should get a bigger dog...but then I'd have two animals driving me insane.
Otherwise, the dump is not that bad. I might take a short term (or month to month) lease at the end of this one if they let me 'cause I'll be too lazy to move, probably. It's just so much work. I've moved like 6 times in the past 8 years (and that doesn't count the christmas breaks in college).
I did a little bit of jogging today. I've also been doing some yoga and stuff. And I'm going to try not to buy junk food so much. These quaker rice cake mini things are really not that bad (if you're starving and get used to it). haha.
I also feel like I REALLY need to start something interesting. Some kind of project or endeavor, preferably money-making. I want to make a lot of money. I dunno why it suddenly became urgent. It just seems like it's now or never. So I need to figure out how I'm going to commit to something. Or how I can do everything. One thing at a time, maybe?
I am so conflicted. So desperate not to be sad again. So desperate to want all those things that wanting made me so sad in the first place.
I really do need to get more exercise and eat better though. It's a matter of feeling good in general. I don't know why I let this thing I want so bad that is totally within my control slip away from me so easily time and time again.
Today I took the dog on a long walk around the neighborhood. There is nothing really inspiring about this neighborhood so it kinda sucks. But anyway, I realize the one thing really pissing me off about my apartment, is the neighbor downstairs creeps me the fuck out. I need a to find a guy or something to come in and out of my apartment rather visibly a couple times a week or something so it looks like I have someone available to kick his ass if he ever tries anything.
Or maybe I should get a bigger dog...but then I'd have two animals driving me insane.
Otherwise, the dump is not that bad. I might take a short term (or month to month) lease at the end of this one if they let me 'cause I'll be too lazy to move, probably. It's just so much work. I've moved like 6 times in the past 8 years (and that doesn't count the christmas breaks in college).
I did a little bit of jogging today. I've also been doing some yoga and stuff. And I'm going to try not to buy junk food so much. These quaker rice cake mini things are really not that bad (if you're starving and get used to it). haha.
I also feel like I REALLY need to start something interesting. Some kind of project or endeavor, preferably money-making. I want to make a lot of money. I dunno why it suddenly became urgent. It just seems like it's now or never. So I need to figure out how I'm going to commit to something. Or how I can do everything. One thing at a time, maybe?
I am so conflicted. So desperate not to be sad again. So desperate to want all those things that wanting made me so sad in the first place.