A letter to someone
I don't really understand my initial attraction to you. I mean sure you were cute, but I still don't understand what put you above everyone else. I mean I think If Johnny Depp were at that party, I still would have walked up to you instead, which I just really never have understood. There was just something about you from the very beginning. I remember you left that night I met you while I was asleep, and I was almost posative that I'd never see you again. I mean how could I be that lucky. 6 months down the road I see you at school and it took everything inside of me to try to hide my excitement and shock, I wanted you to think of me as a nuce but busy girl, not some obsessed weirdo, so we exchanged numbers. I swear it was one of my happiest moments, and not only did we exchange numbers, a few nights later we hung out until 4 in the morning. Not only were you cute you were an awesome kisser,You had this voice that drove me insane(in a good way) and you made me blush like no one else ever has. I could never imagine being so overwhelmed with such happiness. A few nights later you tell me that you are having second thoughts about your ex girlfriend. I was devastated, but I acted as if it was no big deal. I could not let you see how much I liked you because if I did, then you would no longer find me interesting, so I had to hide the pain I felt, I mean, I couldn't really like you that much anyways, we'd only been hanging out for a week. So I go on with my life and hope that someday you will call me. I occasionally would message you to let you know which number you could reach me at since my cell kept getting turned off, finally You call. You and your ex broke up and you wanted to see me. I once more was happy. You come over to see me the next night, and we agian hang out until 4 am, only this time we fall asleep. You leave and I don't hear from you for three days, and you no longer answer your phone. I finally get something from you saying you don't have time for someone in your life right now. I keep telling myself that thats the truth. That you're just really busy, and dealing with a lot, but knowing that even when I am going through a lot, I don't just boot people I care about out of my life makes me really question whether you ever liked me at all. Again I feel that I shouldn't feel so hurt, that I shouldn't want to cry, but I do. I don't understand how I can like someone I know so little about so very much, but I do. I don't want to. I never want to like anyone at all, and then to like someone in the way I like you in the amount I like you, it just kills me inside. I don't know how to snap myself out of this. What should I do?