Stuck
I'm in love with someone who probably doesn't exist anymore. But I still love him.
I don't understand how I could give him everything and it wasn't enough. Surprisingly, no one that I talk to understands either. Maybe he does.
Two and a half years. You would think that after that amount of time, it isn't possible for the love you had for someone to disappear. Not when you had become part of each other's families. Not when you had grown together and worried together and were happy together. Not when everything that reminds you of the past two years reminds you of him.
My dreams make me suffer. I'll dream of him coming back, and I dread waking up. I'll dream of him moving on, and I'm just facing reality.
I admit that while I gave him so much, he gave me so little in the last months. Does that make me a fool for having ignored it and believed what he said a year ago, that "she's going to college and it'll be hard, but we'll get through it"? But he's a different person than he was then. The person he was, the person I'm in love with, would never have hurt me like he did two weeks ago.
So now I have a chance to move on. Someone found me, and he's wonderful and he respects me.
But we all know that I can't force myself to let go if I'm still holding on.
I don't understand how I could give him everything and it wasn't enough. Surprisingly, no one that I talk to understands either. Maybe he does.
Two and a half years. You would think that after that amount of time, it isn't possible for the love you had for someone to disappear. Not when you had become part of each other's families. Not when you had grown together and worried together and were happy together. Not when everything that reminds you of the past two years reminds you of him.
My dreams make me suffer. I'll dream of him coming back, and I dread waking up. I'll dream of him moving on, and I'm just facing reality.
I admit that while I gave him so much, he gave me so little in the last months. Does that make me a fool for having ignored it and believed what he said a year ago, that "she's going to college and it'll be hard, but we'll get through it"? But he's a different person than he was then. The person he was, the person I'm in love with, would never have hurt me like he did two weeks ago.
So now I have a chance to move on. Someone found me, and he's wonderful and he respects me.
But we all know that I can't force myself to let go if I'm still holding on.