Impact
"We all have the potential to fall in love a thousand times in our lifetime. It's easy. The first girl I ever loved was someone I knew in sixth grade. Her name was Missy; we talked about horses. The last girl I love will be someone I haven't even met yet, probably. They all count. But there are certain people you love who do something else; they
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I think I have, or I thought I did, because it didn't work out due to logistics and possibly my own immaturity, but otherwise we had a love that was good, and solid, and sweet, and true. Or at least that's how I felt about it at the time, and look back on it fondly, even now. For a long time after, I kept searching for the same, but now I don't think one can ever find the same kind of love without the same kind of timing, and circumstance, and stage you are in your life "in your head".
But the thing is, he also helped to define my understanding of love by what it is not. That common interests, or personality traits, don't matter in the long run, but the level of value you put on respecting your similarities and differences does. That emotional needs do matter, and that the capability of your partner to fulfill these has a great impact on your overall happiness. That sometimes you have to amend your ideas of what shape or form love takes, because you might be surprised.
How about you?
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Thankfully, there's no statute of limitations on LJ threads! Most of us will always be available.
I have indeed met the person who's defined my understanding of love, yes. It's my current love, the woman with whom I've spent the past eight years, the gal who married me two years ago. My first marriage, which ended a decade ago, was only the beginning of what I thought love could be; neither of us were very mature, either. The most difficult learning experience of my life, but invaluable.
My current lady rewrote the rule book. She's shown me how deep love can go, how it can rattle every fiber of your body, how one can devote her or his heart to another so fully. We're connected on an absurd level now. Though we have our issues, like any other couple, our futures are intertwined interminably. Takes tons of work sometimes, especially when life's more problematic stumbling blocks present themselves. This year's been a mother, man.
Those people are out there, LL! Took me a while, but I found the person who redefined everything for me, and you'll likely find that person, too, or experience something similar. When it's "right," the sweetness and solid nature of your love from years past will seem like the mere foundation of love's potential. Probably takes finding another person who's been through some things as well, and when that connection is made, the world's most vivid lightbulb will turn on. "Oh...!!"
Seems like that sweetheart of yore gave you a great LEGO set, though. So many folks think that adoration of the same bands and movies will result in a family cemetery plot. People are different, of course, but lordy! Plug into a deeper emotional current and you're home, you know?
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