Long time, no LJ
For me, there are two types of music. Music that I can listen to in the background, while I make flashcards, while I surf the web, whatever.
And then there's the music which listening to is an ordeal. It is, to use a cliche, an experience. It might sound lame, but its true. Ra-Se-N, by Luna Sea, Behind Blue Eyes- The Who, Babe I'm Gonna Leave You- Led Zeppelin, Dress- Buck-Tick, and of course many, many others. I cannot listen to these songs without being pulled in, without completely losing track of what I'm doing, without feeling like it's an actual physical event, and when the song ends, it feels like waking up. My batteries once died in the middle of Ra-Se-N, and I literally gasped out loud, it felt like cold water had been dumped over me. When I listen to these songs, and, I'm going to sound very lame again, but I honestly can't think of any other way to describe it, it's like I'm transported. I guess I've turned it into a sort of coping mechanism. Some people exercise, some people clean, some people eat, I listen to these songs as a way to get away. I will literally get frantic if i don't know where my iPod is when I need my music. I used to joke that music was my drug, but you know, I don't even think I'm joking anymore. I don't know whether I should be worried or not.
I was having a great day today, then something happened and I got depressed. I hadn't listened to any music at all all day, so I popped in a Luna Sea concert. And within literally 5 seconds, I was smiling.
Anyway. In real life, school has started. I LOVE LOVE my classes! Ancient Roman history, ancient Chinese history, Shakespeare, colonial and postcolonial Japanese literature (I already have a topic for our big paper!!), and Discovering Greece through Archeology. ALL my teachers are awesome, and I only have class one Thursdays and Fridays! Really, nothing to stress about. I'm even doing fine with my homework! I was done by 6 last night!
I'm going shopping with Jazmina and Amanda tomorrow, and I actually have money to buy a shirt or something yay! Of course, that's assuming the stupid snowstorm stops. Getting to dinner tonight was an adventure, the sidewalk was completely iced over! Maggie is coming on Saturday to give me a guitar lesson finally!! So excited. Aaand me and Tamara and Kate might go to a movie Sunday, but maybe not. Tamara has a load of movies anyway, we could just watch a movie in her room, and stay warm. I like being warm.
And lately I've been angsting about writing. Some days I'll be like, okay this is fine, and other days (like today), I'll be like Fuck! I suck! I'm such a shitty writer! I mean, I understand you can't be at your best all the time, every time you sit down to write something, but I'll go back to read something I had written that I thought was good and realize that it is not, in fact, very good at all. That, in fact, it sounds very very stupid.
And then there's the music which listening to is an ordeal. It is, to use a cliche, an experience. It might sound lame, but its true. Ra-Se-N, by Luna Sea, Behind Blue Eyes- The Who, Babe I'm Gonna Leave You- Led Zeppelin, Dress- Buck-Tick, and of course many, many others. I cannot listen to these songs without being pulled in, without completely losing track of what I'm doing, without feeling like it's an actual physical event, and when the song ends, it feels like waking up. My batteries once died in the middle of Ra-Se-N, and I literally gasped out loud, it felt like cold water had been dumped over me. When I listen to these songs, and, I'm going to sound very lame again, but I honestly can't think of any other way to describe it, it's like I'm transported. I guess I've turned it into a sort of coping mechanism. Some people exercise, some people clean, some people eat, I listen to these songs as a way to get away. I will literally get frantic if i don't know where my iPod is when I need my music. I used to joke that music was my drug, but you know, I don't even think I'm joking anymore. I don't know whether I should be worried or not.
I was having a great day today, then something happened and I got depressed. I hadn't listened to any music at all all day, so I popped in a Luna Sea concert. And within literally 5 seconds, I was smiling.
Anyway. In real life, school has started. I LOVE LOVE my classes! Ancient Roman history, ancient Chinese history, Shakespeare, colonial and postcolonial Japanese literature (I already have a topic for our big paper!!), and Discovering Greece through Archeology. ALL my teachers are awesome, and I only have class one Thursdays and Fridays! Really, nothing to stress about. I'm even doing fine with my homework! I was done by 6 last night!
I'm going shopping with Jazmina and Amanda tomorrow, and I actually have money to buy a shirt or something yay! Of course, that's assuming the stupid snowstorm stops. Getting to dinner tonight was an adventure, the sidewalk was completely iced over! Maggie is coming on Saturday to give me a guitar lesson finally!! So excited. Aaand me and Tamara and Kate might go to a movie Sunday, but maybe not. Tamara has a load of movies anyway, we could just watch a movie in her room, and stay warm. I like being warm.
And lately I've been angsting about writing. Some days I'll be like, okay this is fine, and other days (like today), I'll be like Fuck! I suck! I'm such a shitty writer! I mean, I understand you can't be at your best all the time, every time you sit down to write something, but I'll go back to read something I had written that I thought was good and realize that it is not, in fact, very good at all. That, in fact, it sounds very very stupid.