It was a struggle, to say the least. Being with someone you knew you shouldn't be with, someone you knew you shouldn't even want. But Luke wanted him. He wanted him badly. And now, he had him. Maybe. He wasn't sure. There had been kisses, there had been moments, moments of pure want and lust and desire, but...but what were they? Luke wondered to himself as he stepped into the elevator, smiling as Reid followed closely.
"You don't have to come with me, you know." Luke kept his voice low as the elevator doors slid closed, as if his voice would shatter the air in the tiny space. Reid was coming with him to pay a visit to Noah. Not as a doctor, but as a friend. Gone were the gloves and the scrubs and the clipboards, replaced with jeans and a t-shirt and honest-to-god sneakers. Luke rarely saw him like this, but when he did, it was a sight he cherished. It was a broken down, human version of the snarky, intimidating doctor who had ignored and insulted him more times than he could remember. It was the visual representation of the man who had somehow managed to steal his heart and spike his lust and earn his trust. How had that happened?
It didn't matter though, because he was here now. Here because he wanted to be. Here with Luke, in the elevator.
"You don't think I know that, Luke?" Reid turned, smiling slightly at the younger man. "I want to go with you. I want to be here for you." His words were steady and strong, but Luke raised an eyebrow, questioning his motives. "What? You really think I'm gonna let you run off to be by your ex-boyfriend's bedside without me?" Reid smiled as he leaned back against the reflective wall of the elevator, and Luke felt his own face mirror the expression.
"It's not like that." Luke reached his hand across the small space between them, letting his fingertips brush against Reid's arm. It was a small gesture, but it felt like thunder and fire all the same. "You know that I just need to..." Luke searched for the words he needed, keeping his hand on the doctor's arm the whole time, "I just need to make sure he's alright."
"I know." Reid nodded once, a quick, abrupt motion, and Luke believed him. He did know. "I get it, Luke."
"Good." Luke smiled wider, tightening his grip on Reid's arm as he took a step toward him.
His feet slid under him as the elevator stuttered and stopped, a loud bang echoing through the walls. The lights flickered fleetingly, and Luke braced himself against the wall, falling heavily against Reid's body.
Reid swore under his breath, and Luke felt him fist his hands in the shirt fabric near Luke's waist.
"How could this possibly happen to the same people twice? Seriously!" Reid's voice was loud and erratic, and Luke thought back to the first time. The panic and claustrophobia and fear that had broken the doctor down. That had been the first time he ever faced his feelings for Reid. Before then, he hadn't even known they'd existed. He hadn't realized that he was beginning to see him as something more than Noah's doctor. Being close, being trapped, it had cleared his mind and given him perspective.
Luke didn't pull back when Reid reached out and pulled him in, fitting their mouths together perfectly. It was warm and soft and familiar in a way that Luke never thought possible. Reid's hands trailed along his body, tugging and pulling and pushing and rubbing, and Luke thought about how tentative he'd been to let this happen. He'd been scared and ashamed, guilty even. But not now. Not anymore.
Because, there was nothing to feel bad about. Reid was pressed up against the wall, gasping for breath, and Luke knew that he had never seen anything more beautiful.
They didn't feel the elevator hum and kick beneath them. They didn't hear the door open, or see the lights steady. Because this time, there was no panic. There was no rush of awkward tension. There was just Luke and Reid. And Luke knew, was absolutely certain, that that was exactly the way things should be.
"You don't have to come with me, you know." Luke kept his voice low as the elevator doors slid closed, as if his voice would shatter the air in the tiny space. Reid was coming with him to pay a visit to Noah. Not as a doctor, but as a friend. Gone were the gloves and the scrubs and the clipboards, replaced with jeans and a t-shirt and honest-to-god sneakers. Luke rarely saw him like this, but when he did, it was a sight he cherished. It was a broken down, human version of the snarky, intimidating doctor who had ignored and insulted him more times than he could remember. It was the visual representation of the man who had somehow managed to steal his heart and spike his lust and earn his trust. How had that happened?
It didn't matter though, because he was here now. Here because he wanted to be. Here with Luke, in the elevator.
"You don't think I know that, Luke?" Reid turned, smiling slightly at the younger man. "I want to go with you. I want to be here for you." His words were steady and strong, but Luke raised an eyebrow, questioning his motives. "What? You really think I'm gonna let you run off to be by your ex-boyfriend's bedside without me?" Reid smiled as he leaned back against the reflective wall of the elevator, and Luke felt his own face mirror the expression.
"It's not like that." Luke reached his hand across the small space between them, letting his fingertips brush against Reid's arm. It was a small gesture, but it felt like thunder and fire all the same. "You know that I just need to..." Luke searched for the words he needed, keeping his hand on the doctor's arm the whole time, "I just need to make sure he's alright."
"I know." Reid nodded once, a quick, abrupt motion, and Luke believed him. He did know. "I get it, Luke."
"Good." Luke smiled wider, tightening his grip on Reid's arm as he took a step toward him.
His feet slid under him as the elevator stuttered and stopped, a loud bang echoing through the walls. The lights flickered fleetingly, and Luke braced himself against the wall, falling heavily against Reid's body.
Reid swore under his breath, and Luke felt him fist his hands in the shirt fabric near Luke's waist.
"How could this possibly happen to the same people twice? Seriously!" Reid's voice was loud and erratic, and Luke thought back to the first time. The panic and claustrophobia and fear that had broken the doctor down. That had been the first time he ever faced his feelings for Reid. Before then, he hadn't even known they'd existed. He hadn't realized that he was beginning to see him as something more than Noah's doctor. Being close, being trapped, it had cleared his mind and given him perspective.
Luke didn't pull back when Reid reached out and pulled him in, fitting their mouths together perfectly. It was warm and soft and familiar in a way that Luke never thought possible. Reid's hands trailed along his body, tugging and pulling and pushing and rubbing, and Luke thought about how tentative he'd been to let this happen. He'd been scared and ashamed, guilty even. But not now. Not anymore.
Because, there was nothing to feel bad about. Reid was pressed up against the wall, gasping for breath, and Luke knew that he had never seen anything more beautiful.
They didn't feel the elevator hum and kick beneath them. They didn't hear the door open, or see the lights steady. Because this time, there was no panic. There was no rush of awkward tension. There was just Luke and Reid. And Luke knew, was absolutely certain, that that was exactly the way things should be.
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