Fic: Got Sin? (15/21 + Epilogue)
Media: Fic
Title: Got Sin?
Author: slayerkitty
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Damian/Lily, Eventual Holden/Lily, Past Katie/Brad
Genre: AU, Romance, Angst
Warnings: Exploration of Religion (particularly Catholicism) and Atheism, homophobia (From other characters as well as religious beliefs and some internalized homophobia), mild violence, Characters impersonating religious figures
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Through Sept 2nd, 2010 to be safe (but this is AU, so no real spoilers)
Word Count: This chapter: 1,078/Total: 24,653
Disclaimer: ATWT and its characters are not mine. I'm just playing with them.
Summary: There's no religion that can save me, no matter how long my knees are on the floor.
Author’s Note: I came up with this random idea to do a LuRe seven dead sins fic. In the course of trying to figure it out, the fic suddenly mutated into what you see now. I have no idea what possessed me (hah!) to write this, but the idea won't let me go. PLEASE, PLEASE HEED THE WARNINGS - if you think something in this fic might offend you in some way, please don't read it. Summary is from “It Will Rain” by Bruno Mars.
Thanks to alissablue for being an awesome beta. Also thanks to erikssiren for helping me out with the Catholicism related items.
Previous Chapters: 1/ 2/ 3/ 4/ 5/ 6/ 7/ 8/ 9/ 10/ 11/ 12/ 13/ 14
I scraped my knees while I was praying and found a demon in my safest haven. Seems like it's getting harder to believe in anything than just to get lost in all my selfish thoughts - Turn It Off, Paramore
“You’re sure you want to do this?” Reid asked Luke. They were both naked in the barn, making up for lost time. Luke had already come once. Now he was staring at Reid with those wide Bambi-like eyes of his, asking if he could give Reid a blowjob.
Fucking hell, the answer to that would always be yes.
Luke nodded, biting his lip. “Then why do you look so freaked out?” Reid asked.
“I’m not entirely sure what I should do,” Luke told him. “I want you to enjoy it.”
“Trust me, I’ll enjoy it,” Reid replied. Luke just stared at him. He reached out and touched Luke’s lips with his thumb, caressing Luke’s cheek with his hand.
“Tell me what to do,” Luke said, his voice low and thick.
“Open your mouth and relax your jaw as much as you can,” Reid instructed. “Try and keep your teeth covered, and don’t try to take it all in at once,” he continued. “That usually leads to bad things.”
Luke nodded again, and then slid forward on his knees, putting his hands on Reid’s chest and pushing him down onto the blanket. Reid settled onto his back, Luke on top of him. Their lips met in a hungry kiss and Reid arched up against Luke when Luke’s knee brushed his incredibly hard and aching cock. He was so, so ready to come and he hoped that Luke knew was he was getting into. Luke’s lips left his and moved south; pressing kisses to his skin along the way. Luke paid special attention to Reid’s hip and pelvic area. He sucked a hickey on Reid’s inner thigh, and Reid thought he might go insane if Luke’s mouth didn’t touch his cock sometime soon. He didn’t want to rush Luke though - he knew how intimidating it could be to have no idea what to do. So he waited, his eyes closed, for Luke make his move.
He felt the tiniest lick on the underside of his cock and his breath caught in his throat. Luke’s mouth was tentative, licking him a few more times before finally sucking the head of Reid’s cock. Reid held himself as stiffly as he could, controlling the urge to thrust up. That would only end this and fuck if Reid didn’t want it to last forever.
He cried out when Luke sank farther down, taking a little more into his mouth before pulling off to gasp for air.
“Okay?” Reid asked, opening his eyes. Luke looked debauched - his eyes were wide and dark with desire, his lips swollen. Luke nodded, his mouth sinking back down on Reid’s cock. “Fuck,” Reid gasped out, startled. Luke moaned and the sound vibrated around him. Luke’s mouth around his cock was the ultimate definition of sin and it was going to send Reid straight to Hell. His impending orgasm coiled tightly in his stomach. Reid pulled on Luke’s hair, pulling him off and jerking him up to kiss him. Luke’s hand wrapped around his erection and stroked. He could taste himself on Luke’s lips and that was all it took to send him flying over the edge.
“Dear God in heaven,” Luke murmured in his ear. “You swearing should not be such a turn on.” Reid smirked. “I didn’t think I’d like doing…that, that much.”
“You have excellent potential,” Reid replied. “I give you an A-plus.”
“Really?” Luke blushed.
“Really.” Reid kissed him to prove his point.
“I never thought I’d ever find someone like you,” Luke breathed out. “I - I never imagined it could be like this.” He sighed. “I was too busy being terrified of myself and my feelings and what everyone else would think - and how everything I was feeling was sin.”
“And now?”
“Now I’m… questioning everything,” Luke said. “Everything I thought I knew to be true.”
“I never wanted that for you,” Reid told him. “I never wanted this to make you question your faith.”
“No.” Luke pressed his forehead to Reid’s. “I’m so glad that I am. I’m gay,” he whispered. “It’s time I start trying to accept that about myself.” Luke laughed. “I don’t think I’ve ever said that out loud before.”
“How do you feel?”
“Free,” Luke answered, meeting Reid’s eyes. “That’s how I feel when I’m with you - Like I’m flying, like I can do anything.”
“Luke…” Reid didn’t know what to say. No one had ever told him anything like that. He couldn’t even fathom the idea that he could evoke that kind of emotion in someone else. Anger, fear, irritation - those he knew he was a pro at making others feel.
“Don’t say anything,” Luke murmured. “I know you’re only here for a couple more days.”
“I wish I…” Reid trailed off.
“You wish what?”
“I wish I could stay,” Reid admitted. It was true. The moment he’d stepped foot in Oakdale, he’d wanted out. He’d only stayed because Lucinda had stuck her neck out for him and gotten Bob Hughes on his side, and he’d had a job at the hospital.
“Could you tell them that?” Luke asked, his voice full of hope.
Reid shook his head. “It’s out of my hands, Luke,” he sighed.
“This sucks,” Luke muttered, choked up. “I finally found someone who… who gets me and I have to lose him just as I’ve…”
“Luke, we shouldn’t have done this,” Reid told him. “I should have let you walk away that day in the garden.”
“I don’t regret it.” Luke kissed him gently. “I don’t.” Reid kissed him back, harder. He didn’t know what he was feeling, but his skin was crawling and his heart was beating fast and he just had to be as close to Luke’s as possible. “I want you,” Luke gasped out between kisses, “to make love to me.”
“That’s what we’re doing,” Reid teased, trying to lighten the moment.
“Reid, I mean, I want...” Luke stammered. Reid closed his eyes. He knew what Luke meant.
“I know,” Reid breathed out. “I know.”
“Please…”
“Not-not today,” Reid managed.
“Tomorrow,” Luke replied.
“Tomorrow,” Reid agreed after a long moment. “Tomorrow.”
Title: Got Sin?
Author: slayerkitty
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Damian/Lily, Eventual Holden/Lily, Past Katie/Brad
Genre: AU, Romance, Angst
Warnings: Exploration of Religion (particularly Catholicism) and Atheism, homophobia (From other characters as well as religious beliefs and some internalized homophobia), mild violence, Characters impersonating religious figures
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Through Sept 2nd, 2010 to be safe (but this is AU, so no real spoilers)
Word Count: This chapter: 1,078/Total: 24,653
Disclaimer: ATWT and its characters are not mine. I'm just playing with them.
Summary: There's no religion that can save me, no matter how long my knees are on the floor.
Author’s Note: I came up with this random idea to do a LuRe seven dead sins fic. In the course of trying to figure it out, the fic suddenly mutated into what you see now. I have no idea what possessed me (hah!) to write this, but the idea won't let me go. PLEASE, PLEASE HEED THE WARNINGS - if you think something in this fic might offend you in some way, please don't read it. Summary is from “It Will Rain” by Bruno Mars.
Thanks to alissablue for being an awesome beta. Also thanks to erikssiren for helping me out with the Catholicism related items.
Previous Chapters: 1/ 2/ 3/ 4/ 5/ 6/ 7/ 8/ 9/ 10/ 11/ 12/ 13/ 14
I scraped my knees while I was praying and found a demon in my safest haven. Seems like it's getting harder to believe in anything than just to get lost in all my selfish thoughts - Turn It Off, Paramore
“You’re sure you want to do this?” Reid asked Luke. They were both naked in the barn, making up for lost time. Luke had already come once. Now he was staring at Reid with those wide Bambi-like eyes of his, asking if he could give Reid a blowjob.
Fucking hell, the answer to that would always be yes.
Luke nodded, biting his lip. “Then why do you look so freaked out?” Reid asked.
“I’m not entirely sure what I should do,” Luke told him. “I want you to enjoy it.”
“Trust me, I’ll enjoy it,” Reid replied. Luke just stared at him. He reached out and touched Luke’s lips with his thumb, caressing Luke’s cheek with his hand.
“Tell me what to do,” Luke said, his voice low and thick.
“Open your mouth and relax your jaw as much as you can,” Reid instructed. “Try and keep your teeth covered, and don’t try to take it all in at once,” he continued. “That usually leads to bad things.”
Luke nodded again, and then slid forward on his knees, putting his hands on Reid’s chest and pushing him down onto the blanket. Reid settled onto his back, Luke on top of him. Their lips met in a hungry kiss and Reid arched up against Luke when Luke’s knee brushed his incredibly hard and aching cock. He was so, so ready to come and he hoped that Luke knew was he was getting into. Luke’s lips left his and moved south; pressing kisses to his skin along the way. Luke paid special attention to Reid’s hip and pelvic area. He sucked a hickey on Reid’s inner thigh, and Reid thought he might go insane if Luke’s mouth didn’t touch his cock sometime soon. He didn’t want to rush Luke though - he knew how intimidating it could be to have no idea what to do. So he waited, his eyes closed, for Luke make his move.
He felt the tiniest lick on the underside of his cock and his breath caught in his throat. Luke’s mouth was tentative, licking him a few more times before finally sucking the head of Reid’s cock. Reid held himself as stiffly as he could, controlling the urge to thrust up. That would only end this and fuck if Reid didn’t want it to last forever.
He cried out when Luke sank farther down, taking a little more into his mouth before pulling off to gasp for air.
“Okay?” Reid asked, opening his eyes. Luke looked debauched - his eyes were wide and dark with desire, his lips swollen. Luke nodded, his mouth sinking back down on Reid’s cock. “Fuck,” Reid gasped out, startled. Luke moaned and the sound vibrated around him. Luke’s mouth around his cock was the ultimate definition of sin and it was going to send Reid straight to Hell. His impending orgasm coiled tightly in his stomach. Reid pulled on Luke’s hair, pulling him off and jerking him up to kiss him. Luke’s hand wrapped around his erection and stroked. He could taste himself on Luke’s lips and that was all it took to send him flying over the edge.
“Dear God in heaven,” Luke murmured in his ear. “You swearing should not be such a turn on.” Reid smirked. “I didn’t think I’d like doing…that, that much.”
“You have excellent potential,” Reid replied. “I give you an A-plus.”
“Really?” Luke blushed.
“Really.” Reid kissed him to prove his point.
“I never thought I’d ever find someone like you,” Luke breathed out. “I - I never imagined it could be like this.” He sighed. “I was too busy being terrified of myself and my feelings and what everyone else would think - and how everything I was feeling was sin.”
“And now?”
“Now I’m… questioning everything,” Luke said. “Everything I thought I knew to be true.”
“I never wanted that for you,” Reid told him. “I never wanted this to make you question your faith.”
“No.” Luke pressed his forehead to Reid’s. “I’m so glad that I am. I’m gay,” he whispered. “It’s time I start trying to accept that about myself.” Luke laughed. “I don’t think I’ve ever said that out loud before.”
“How do you feel?”
“Free,” Luke answered, meeting Reid’s eyes. “That’s how I feel when I’m with you - Like I’m flying, like I can do anything.”
“Luke…” Reid didn’t know what to say. No one had ever told him anything like that. He couldn’t even fathom the idea that he could evoke that kind of emotion in someone else. Anger, fear, irritation - those he knew he was a pro at making others feel.
“Don’t say anything,” Luke murmured. “I know you’re only here for a couple more days.”
“I wish I…” Reid trailed off.
“You wish what?”
“I wish I could stay,” Reid admitted. It was true. The moment he’d stepped foot in Oakdale, he’d wanted out. He’d only stayed because Lucinda had stuck her neck out for him and gotten Bob Hughes on his side, and he’d had a job at the hospital.
“Could you tell them that?” Luke asked, his voice full of hope.
Reid shook his head. “It’s out of my hands, Luke,” he sighed.
“This sucks,” Luke muttered, choked up. “I finally found someone who… who gets me and I have to lose him just as I’ve…”
“Luke, we shouldn’t have done this,” Reid told him. “I should have let you walk away that day in the garden.”
“I don’t regret it.” Luke kissed him gently. “I don’t.” Reid kissed him back, harder. He didn’t know what he was feeling, but his skin was crawling and his heart was beating fast and he just had to be as close to Luke’s as possible. “I want you,” Luke gasped out between kisses, “to make love to me.”
“That’s what we’re doing,” Reid teased, trying to lighten the moment.
“Reid, I mean, I want...” Luke stammered. Reid closed his eyes. He knew what Luke meant.
“I know,” Reid breathed out. “I know.”
“Please…”
“Not-not today,” Reid managed.
“Tomorrow,” Luke replied.
“Tomorrow,” Reid agreed after a long moment. “Tomorrow.”