Facebook Through The Years - Year 4
Title: Facebook Through The Years
Author: Hotlen
Rating: PG-13 (sexual references)
Summary: This will be a series of Facebook status updates by Luke and then the comments. I’m not awesome skilled so it’s not formatted like Facebook with pictures as I know someone else did, so imagine it with me.
YEAR 4: Natalie is 15 almost 16 this year, Faith is 20, Ethan is 10. Luke is 25, Reid is 37, year is 2014
Luke Oliver: The start of a new year.
Katie Hughes: I hope you have a better one than last year!
Luke Oliver: I think I will. And thanks again for getting me a job at WOAK.
Katie Hughes: Anything to help my sort-of-cousin-slash-sort-of-brother-in-law.
Lucinda Walsh: My boy, I think you’ll have a wonderful new year!
Reg Addington: I think you need to spend more time banging your husband.
Luke Oliver: Reg!
Lucinda Walsh: I couldn’t agree more.
Luke Oliver: Grandmother!
Reid Oliver: What sage advice.
Luke Oliver: Reid you have nothing to complain about.
Reid Oliver: Last year I was practically in a desert of sexlessness. You have a lot of making up to do, Snyder.
Katie Hughes: Let me know when this takes place!
Reg Addington: Ditto
Reid Oliver: I’m so glad I don’t still live with you. Do you know I didn’t get into Luke’s pants until we moved in together? Either Mama Lily was downstairs, Grandma Emma had her rules, or you had your ear up to the door. Luke refused all my advances!
Reg Addington: For shame, Luke. I wouldn’t care who heard me or what sort of rules there were, if I had a man like Reid you’d be sure that we’d be hitting it day and night.
Reid Oliver: Why weren’t you telling that to Luke before?
Reg Addington: I had no idea you were having this problem.
Casey Hughes: Who knew Luke Snyder was such a prude. haha
Luke Oliver: Alright, all of you stop it. I’m sorry I don’t want my mom, my grandmother or my sort-of-cousin listening to me having sex with Reid for the first time.
Casey Hughes: Doesn’t your mom own a hotel?
Reid Oliver: Thank you!
Noah Mayer: Well, we waited two years so…
Luke Oliver: That ain’t my fault.
Reid Oliver: I could barely last two months. I could have done a study on the effect of blue balls on a person’s psyche.
Casey Hughes: What were your remedies, Reid? I might need them with Alison at the hospital 24/7
Luke Oliver: This conversation is O-V-E-R
Reid Oliver: Here are a list of things I did when Luke wouldn’t have sex with me: Pocket hockey, Spanking the monkey, Playing the skin flute, Fly fishing, Going blind (sorry Noah, but now I understand how you came to be in that circumstance. Is “fireworks” a euphemism for Luke’s sexually charged body?), Playing a little five-on-one, and for those of you medically inclined, testing for testicular cancer?
Luke Oliver: All I can do at this point is shake my head solemnly and mutter, “this is the man I married”.
Reid Oliver: Lucky.
Luke Oliver: Indeed.
Luke Oliver is now friends with Jade Taylor
Jade Taylor wrote “I know we haven’t talked in years, which is appalling. Casey told me about your relapse into alcohol, but he says you’re doing better now. Maybe I’ll come back to Oakdale for the holidays. Meet this doctor of yours.
Luke Oliver: It is so great to hear from you again. I’ll call you this weekend and we can catch up!
Luke Oliver: My new years resolution: I want to start working out. Not because I think I’m fat, mom, but I want abs.
Casey Hughes: HA! Luke with abs!
Maddie Coleman: Aww little Luke with abs. You’d be so cute!
Jade Taylor: What in the world would possess you to want abs, Luke?
Reid Oliver: He’s jealous of mine.
Luke Oliver: Thank you all for laughing.
Jade Taylor: You look like a little kid. Have you ever seen a little kid with abs? It’s disturbing.
Luke Oliver: Forget you all. I’ll show you. I’m going to get abs and I’ll look extremely hot.
Reid Oliver: You do look extremely hot.
Casey Hughes: Yeah, even I went gay for you.
Noah Mayer: What do you want with abs anyway?
Luke Oliver: I want them, idk, I’ve never had them. You have them, God knows Reid has them, Casey has them, why can’t I?
Casey Hughes: Because you’re too adorable Lookie-wookie.
Luke Oliver: Fine, forget I said anything.
Katie Hughes: Luke, you’re hot. You know I think so. Your charm is that you’re hot without all the muscles. There’s no way else to put it but you’re hot.
Luke Oliver: I get it, Katie, thanks.
Reid Oliver: Damn right you’re hot.
Luke Oliver wrote “Congratulations Faithie!” on Faith Snyder’s wall
Faith Snyder: I’m going to be a mother will you please not call me Faithie?
Luke Oliver: I can’t believe you are going to be a mom!
Reid Oliver: I can’t believe you got pregnant by your cousin.
Luke Oliver: For the last time, Parker’s not related Reid!
Reid Oliver: You grew up as cousins!
Faith Snyder: Shut up Reid.
Reid Oliver: I will never understand Oakhell
Luke Oliver is now friends with Parker Snyder
Luke Oliver wrote, “I know you’re a good person but as the older brother I have to say, if you hurt Faith in any way I will make Reid give you a lobotomy with no anesthesia
Parker Snyder: She’s carrying my child, I could never hurt her, Luke
Luke Oliver: Yeah well I know what kind of wonderful (that was sarcastic) role models our parents have been, so I hope you know better
Parker Snyder: I also have the role model of you and Reid
Luke Oliver: My bath gel keeps running out mysteriously early. I think Reid is stealing it.
Casey Hughes: He wants to smell pretty too!
Henry Coleman: I knew he smelled different lately
Luke Oliver: Um, why are you sniffing my husband?
Katie Hughes: Yeah Henry, why?
Henry Coleman: Oh shut up
Reid Oliver: I’m adding this to the growing list of reasons why Hank is in love with me
Luke Oliver: Valentines Day! Hahaha, Reid asked me to marry him. He forgot he already did that! Cutest thing ever! And then he said, “At least you know now I’d do it again if I had to” awwwww <3
Katie Hughes: That is the sweetest thing ever
Lucinda Walsh: I knew that man was brilliant! I’m so glad you found him, Luke
Luke Oliver: We all have Damien to thank for that
Lily Snyder: Why Damien?
Luke Oliver: He was the one who told me to pretend I had blackmail on Reid to get him to come to Oakdalde for Noah’s surgery
Reid Oliver: I knew you were bluffing!
Noah Mayer: What I’m worried about is what Reid actually thought you had on him? You had to believe him about something, Reid.
Lucinda Walsh: Noah, dear, shut up
Reid Oliver wrote “This is for your EX. I’m posting it here because he and I are not as you call “Facebook Friends” and therefore he can see it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eR7-AUmiNcA&ob=av3e” on Luke Oliver’s wall
Noah Mayer: Mature Reid
Reid Oliver: Sometimes I have to stoop down to your level
Casey Hughes: Ouch
Luke Oliver: You have to admit, Noah, that song really does hit a few nerves
Casey Hughes: Double ouch
Luke Oliver: Spring Break! Leaving tomorrow for cabins in Copper Harbor! Renting a big van for Reid and I, Natalie, Ethan, mom and dad. This is going to be interesting!
Henry Coleman: Oh do take video, Luke
Chris Hughes: I hope everyone survives
Reid Oliver: Help me.
Luke Oliver: Passed mile 69. Reid won’t stop laughing.
Jade Taylor: What part of the 69 are you?
Natalie Snyder: I don’t get it, why is 69 so funny to Reid?
Luke Oliver: If anyone explains that to her I will get Damien to kill you
Casey Hughes: RAWR Mr. Grimaldi comes out to play
Reid Oliver: You told Casey about our role play?
Casey Hughes: EW TMI!
Luke Oliver: Stop it you two, Natalie won’t stop asking about 69 and now Ethan’s joined in
Luke Oliver: Phew they stopped
Alison Stewart: What finally got them to stop asking?
Luke Oliver: Reid came up with some really boring medical terminology and the kids fell asleep.
Reid Oliver: Hey! I was trying to educate them. Would you rather me explain to them what 69 means in sexual terminology?
Natalie Snyder wrote, “If we have to stop one more time for you I’m going to smack you upside the head” on Luke Snyder’s wall
Reid Oliver: At least we know his kidney is working.
Natalie Snyder: Ever the doctor, Reid.
Casey Hughes wrote “Are you and Reid talking to each other via Facebook while in the same car?” on Luke Oliver’s wall
Luke Oliver: Mom made a rule that Reid and I can’t sit together in the car. Someone can’t keep his hands to himself.
Reid Oliver: They have a mind of their own.
Reid Oliver: It’s not my fault that your mom has a problem with me making out with her little baby boy.
Faith Snyder: Look, I know my family and all of Oakdale is screwed up, and I am having a baby with my sort-of cousin, but you making out with Ethan, no matter what sort of deep soul connection you have, is down right disgusting.
Reid Oliver: Oh HAHA Faith. I hope your kid isn’t born with 4 arms and 12 toes.
Faith Snyder: If he is I’m naming him Reid after the person who doomed him to that fate.
Luke Oliver: You’re having a boy!?!
Faith Snyder: No, chill down Luke.
Luke Oliver: Natalie decided that this would be the perfect time for her to practice expressway driving, and my father agreed. Reid is terrified, but I promised him she wouldn’t drive near any train tracks.
Katie Hughes: Train tracks?
Luke Oliver: It’s an inside joke between us.
Reid Oliver: He had a creepy dream about me one night years ago and now I’m freaked out about train tracks.
Luke Oliver: He refuses to drive near them
Reid Oliver: Please can we stop talking about them, ugh
Luke Oliver: Let’s just say that watching my husband build a bon fire is the sexiest thing alive.
Reid Oliver: how else am I going to devour s’mores?
Casey Hughes: And wieners.
Reid Oliver: I don’t need a bon fire to devour those.
Casey Hughes: Excellent.
Reid Oliver wrote “One of these days I’m going to burn your fortress pajamas.” on Luke Oliver’s wall
Casey Hughes: Fortress pajamas?
Luke Oliver: That’s what Reid calls the pajamas I wear when I don’t want to have sex with him.
Reid Oliver: He’s worn them every night we’ve been in the cabin.
Luke Oliver: My parents and my siblings are in connected rooms!
Luke Oliver: Reid in a canoe. That is all. (please see attached picture)
Henry Coleman: Who knew a canoe would bring down the great Dr. Oliver? He looks terrified!
Chris Hughes: Reid in an over sized life jacket is the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen in my life. You look like an idiot.
Katie Hughes: Oh. My. God.
Faith Snyder: Priceless picture is priceless
Gretchen Taylor: Wait until the nurses see this!
Luke Oliver: Then we tipped over “accidentally”. (see attached photo of wet Reid)
Reid Oliver: I knew you did that on purpose!
Henry Coleman: You look like a drowned rat. Finally the real Dr. Oliver comes out.
Reid Oliver: I thought I already came out to you when you asked me on a date? You wanted to frisk me remember?
Henry Coleman: I’m not gay!
Maddie Coleman: Henry, you know he’s just trying to rile you up
Reid Oliver: No, I do not want Hank to get excited and aroused
Katie Hughes: Reid, can’t you leave him alone?
Reid Oliver: But it’s so fun
Luke Oliver: Aww he’s pouting. Reid how about I promise to take off the fortress pajamas tonight if you will leave Henry alone from now on about the gay stuff.
Reid Oliver: Hank is the straightest butchest man I have ever met.
Luke Oliver: Got back from picking cherries at Kings Orchard.
Reid Oliver: Now popping cherries back at the cabin.
Noah Mayer: I think I already did that awhile ago.
Reid Oliver: Luke has many many more cherries to pop.
Jade Taylor: I knew Luke was a kinky guy. People who act that innocent usually are.
Reid Oliver: You wouldn’t believe the sick twisted things he likes in bed.
Luke Oliver: *eye roll* Reid you are embellishing.
Reid Oliver: Embellishing my cock into your tight ass.
Luke Oliver: REID!
Jade Taylor: Wow…
Luke Oliver: You are going to get blocked, seriously.
Reid Oliver: You’re gay Luke, like they don’t know what you do.
Luke Oliver: I’m not talking about this here. You’re in the same cabin as me, come into the living room and talk to me in person.
Katie Hughes: D.R.A.M.A
Chris Hughes: I knew Oakdale would get to Reid sooner or later.
Reid Oliver has sent you a game request on Top Doc
Luke Oliver: Really, Reid?
Reid Oliver: Can you believe Katie even beat Doogie’s score on this game?
Katie Hughes: It has nothing to do with skill all you do is click buttons.
Luke Oliver: You’re the only one who understands the stupid game now stop sending me friend requests, I’m not playing.
Luke Oliver: OK this made me laugh: It has been brought to my attention that the stick figure decals on the back windows of vehicles are NOT pedestrian "kill" scores, but, actually are meant to represent members of your family. I'll be removing mine ASAP to avoid any further confusion.
Jade Taylor: HA! Priceless!
Lily Snyder: Luke that’s terrible!
Kevin Davis: haha that’s funny!
Casey Hughes: heh awesome
Reid Oliver: I bet they make special decals like that for Oakdale. They have transparent people that depending on the weather will appear and then disappear, and rearrange themselves every month
Henry Coleman: And one is secretly gay, right?
Reid Oliver: Yes, one wears a pink and orange flowered shirt, just for you Hank.
Luke Oliver: Don’t freak people I just thought it was funny.
Kevin Davis: Funny coz it’s true!
Luke Oliver: I am now 26!
Casey Hughes: Happy birthday, Luke! Can’t wait for your party this weekend.
Lily Snyder: Baby, I can’t believe how old you are! You’re a man now!
Luke Oliver: Mom, you say that every year
Holden Snyder: Wait until you have kids, Luke, sometimes you forget how old they are, you can’t help seeing them as the little child you brought into this world.
Reid Oliver: Gross. And don’t get him started on kids. We have a dog.
Katie Snyder: Happy birthday, Luke! And don’t listen to Reid, we all know how he really feels about kids
Jade Taylor: Happy Birthday Cuz!
Maddie Coleman: Happy birthday Luke! Hope you have a great party!
Noah Mayer: Happy birthday Luke! Maybe this summer I can come out and visit while I’m between projects
Luke Oliver: I’d love to see you again, Noah. You too Maddie. Working at WOAK reminds me every day of the fun times the three of us spent together
Reid Oliver: When Noah was sleeping with Maddie and you were depressed and miserable, but then Noah kissed you and then pretended it was a joke, and then you stole Noah away from Maddie who became heart broken and then Noah’s father nearly killed you? Those fun times?
Maddie Coleman: I think we can all say we’ve made our peace with what happened
Noah Mayer: Yeah, besides if it wasn’t for me getting blind then you wouldn’t know Luke, so basically, you owe me one.
Reid Oliver: If I ever owed you anything Noah hell would be frozen over
Luke Oliver: Guys, it’s my birthday, please don’t argue
Noah Mayer: Sorry Luke
Lucinda Walsh: Well ,well, I guess old scars don’t heal so well after all. Happy birthday my darling boy! I will see you at the Lake View for lunch at noon.
Luke Oliver: Studying for finals, I thought this was appropriate: Texting + Facebook = Textbook … so I'm studying right?
Reid Oliver: What’s studying?
Luke Oliver: ha ha genius.
Faith Snyder: I applaud that you know what texting is, Reid.
Reid Oliver: I learned it quickly when Luke said that people use it for sexting
Faith Snyder: gross
Luke Oliver: School’s out for the summer!
Holden Snyder: One more year son!
Faith Snyder: Thank God! I’m about to burst! If I had to sit through another non-air conditioned class with this child kicking at my intestines I would have gone insane!
Reid Oliver: I still can’t believe you are carrying your own cousins child
Luke Oliver: Reid!
Faith Snyder: It’s ok Luke, Reid has womb envy.
Reid Oliver: Womb envy? No, if anyone has womb envy it would be your brother
Faith Snyder: Ew, I don’t need to know my brother’s position in bed
Luke Oliver: Faith!
Reid Oliver: We take turns :)
Luke Oliver: Reid!
Casey Hughes: Go Luke!
Reg Addington: Damn, I need a cigarette.
Luke Oliver: I am closing this discussion!
Luke Oliver: “Firepit fun at my house Saturday night, 7:30-ish. Hotdogs and S'mores! Who's in?!
Reid Oliver: Am I invited?
Casey Hughes: no Reid
Reid Oliver: :(
Reg Addington: Should we let Reid come?
Luke Oliver: I don’t know. Let’s take a vote.
Reid Oliver: I vote maybe.
Reg Addington: I vote to let him come, but he’s the one we’ll make run down the street naked when things get wild :p
Casey Hughes: Make him? I bet he’s already planning on doing it
Reid Oliver: … I am
Luke Oliver: Reid are you coming?
Reid Oliver: I am indeed coming
Casey Hughes: sick dude! Stop turning something fun into something dirty.
Reid Oliver: :P
Luke Oliver: I might change the time a bit. I want it to be close to dark time and I’m not sure what time it gets dark
Reg Addington: lol dark time
Reid Oliver: They call it night
Reg Addington: It gets dark around 8 here
Luke Oliver: So, 7L30 it is
Luke Oliver: 7:30
Casey Hughes: I want to write my time like that 7L30, looks like a new language.
Reid Oliver: I take it back, even the temptation of s’mores can’t get me to hang out with your friends for an evening.
Luke Oliver: Taking Cerebellum on a walk with Reid. I love warm summer nights
Alison Stewart: He’s so domestic
Casey Hughes: Yeah, you trained him well, Luke
Luke Oliver: Well it took some time, slowly but surely he got the idea
Reid Oliver: You better be talking about the dog
Casey Hughes: Dog?
Alison Stewart: lol
Reg Addington wrote “Summer Nights reminds me of the song from Grease” on Luke Oliver’s wall
Reid Oliver: Summer lovin’ had me a blast
Luke Oliver: Summer lovin’ happened so fast
Reid Oliver: I met a boy crazy for me
Luke Oliver: Met a boy, cute as can be. Summer days drifting away to uh oh those summer nights
Reg Addington: Tell me more! Tell me more!
Katie Hughes: Did you get very far?
Alison Stewart: like does he drive a car?
Reid Oliver: he swam by me, he got a cramp
Luke Oliver: He ran by me, got my suit damp
Reid Oliver: I saved his life (because I’m a doctor duh) he nearly drowned
Luke Oliver: He showed off, splashing around. Summer sun something’s begun but uh oh those summer nights
Reg Addington: Tell me more tell me more!
Alison Stewart: Was it love at first sight?
Katie Hughes: Did he put up a fight?
Reid Oliver: Took him bowling in the arcade
Luke Oliver: We went strolling, drank lemonade
Reid Oliver: We made out under the dock
Luke Oliver: We stayed out, till 10 o’clock! Summer fling don’t mean a thing but uh oh those summer nights!
Reg Addington: Tell me more! Tell me more!
Katie Hughes: But you don’t gotta brag
Alison Stewart: Coz he sounds like a drag
Luke Oliver: He got friendly holding my hand
Reid Oliver: Well he got friendly down in the sand
Luke Oliver: He was sweet just turned 18
Reid Oliver: Well he was good, you know what I mean!
Luke Oliver: Summer heat boy and boy meet but uh oh those summer nights
Reg Addington: Tell me more tell me more!
Alison Stewart: How much dough did he spend?
Katie Hughes: Could he get me a friend?
Reid Oliver: It turned colder that’s where it ends
Luke Oliver: So I told him we’d still be friends
Reid Oliver: Then we made our true love vow
Luke Oliver: Wonder what he’s doing now? Summer dreams, ripped at the seams
Reid Oliver: But oh, those summer nights!!!!
Faith Snyder: Reid wishes he just turned 18.
Katie Hughes: How did you get Reid to do that Luke?
Luke Oliver: promises of blowjobs on the beach can get Reid to do basically anything
Reg Addington: Tell me more! Tell me more!
Reid Oliver: Like you’d agree to that. You hacked into my FB account
Luke Oliver: For my husband
Gretchen Taylor: Ha! Hopefully not from me anymore
Reid Oliver: Can you print that to poster size so I can put it on the bulletin board at the nurses’ station?
Casey Hughes wrote “I found one for your husband too!
”
on Luke Oliver’s wall
Luke Oliver: HA!
Chris Hughes: Ain’t that the truth
Katie Hughes: Come on now, he’s getting better
Henry Coleman: Is he bubbles, really?
Katie Hughes: What did he do this time Henry?
Chris Hughes: What hasn’t he done?
Reg Addington: Me!
Reid Oliver wrote “Yeah well I found one for your mother
”
on Luke Oliver’s wall
Jade Taylor: So true
Luke Oliver: Reid be nice!
Noah Mayer: He does sort of have a point, Luke.
Reid Oliver: Your mom’s breasts are practically on display when she picks up the kids from school! Who is she trying to show those off to Luke, the kindergarteners?
Faith Snyder: Well if she was she’d be taking after you
Reid Oliver: Oh hahaha another cradle robbing joke. At least the person I decided to spend the rest of my life with has a different last name than me.
Faith Snyder: Oh haha another cousin joke
Luke Oliver: Reid, really, stop it
Casey Hughes: Ut oh, Reid is in the dog house now
Luke Oliver: “That’s what.” - She
Casey Hughes: Cute, Luke
Reid Oliver: What?
Casey Hughes: *smacks head on desk*
Reg Addington: hahaha! Brilliant!
Jade Taylor: Awesome. You’re so clever Luke.
Kevin Davis: man you are blowing my mind
Reid Oliver: Let us hope that is all he is blowing on you
Kevin Davis: Sick dude
Reid Oliver: Why do you hang out with these people, Luke?
Katie Hughes: That’s really funny, Luke.
Chris Hughes: I bet he didn’t think of it himself
Reid Oliver: I still don’t get what all the fuss is about
Casey Hughes: THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!!1 OMG THANK YOU REID THAT WAS PERFECT!!!!
Luke Oliver: Bwahahahaa!
Reid Oliver: Why did I marry a teenage girl?
Luke Oliver: Today is Reid’s 38th birthday. Watch out all nurses and doctors and others who have to be around him today. Reid is not pleased.
Faith Snyder: Luke, I think you forgot the 1.
Reid Oliver: Oh hahahaha yes Faith I’m 138. Someone really did drop you on the head as a child or maybe it was all the pot you smoked at boarding school
Luke Oliver: Faith knock it off, I told you Reid’s in a bad mood.
Luke Oliver: Reid just informed me that Please Please Me is about oral sex. I cannot listen to another Beatles song for awhile. My childhood is broken
Maddie Coleman: Oh ew! I never realized!
Luke Oliver: They all have new meanings now! I can’t!
Natalie Oliver: Ew Luke! Why did you post that?
Luke Oliver: I had to share, it was too much for me to keep to myself!
Casey Hughes: DUH LUKE It’s actually more about NOT getting oral and wanting it. “I don’t want to sound complaining but you know there’s always rain in my heart, I do all the pleasing with you it’s so hard to reason with you, oh yeah, why do you make me blue.” Blue balls. Coz he’s not getting any.
Luke Oliver: Do girls not really do it or something?
Casey Hughes: Not usually, at least, not any I’ve had
Reid Oliver: Another perk of being gay
Gretchen Taylor wrote “I thought this was good for your husband: I think I was mistaken when my boss told me he liked to see me hard at work”
Luke Oliver: HA!
Reid Oliver: I do like to see Luke hard at work
Gretchen Taylor: I know, I’m the one who has to guard the door to your office!
Katie Hughes: Kinky
Jade Taylor: Wanky
Chris Hughes: Gross Reid
Reid Oliver: Don’t be jealous just because Katie won’t come to the hospital and give you head.
Casey Hughes: TMI on everything!!
Luke Oliver: You’re just jealous. Maybe if you actually married Alison she’d be more willing to have sex with you.
Casey Hughes: I’m not going to be pressured into marrying her
Reid Oliver: Haven’t you been engaged for 4 years?
Alison Stewart: Exactly, Reid
Luke Oliver: After all these year, after all these tears between us. Still I couldn’t find someone half as right as you. And each time I stop to think what it is I really need. Then I must conclude all I really need is you Happy 2 year anniversary sweetheart!
Lily Snyder: Congrats Luke!
Jade Taylor: 2 years already! Wow Luke!
Reg Addington: Two years and still no threesome together ;) congrats Luke! You lucky SOB
Natalie Snyder: Only 2 years? I can’t even remember a time when Reid wasn’t with us, or maybe it’s just that I don’t want to.
Lucinda Walsh: Here, here Natalie! I completely agree!
Alison Stewart: And yet I am still not married. Happy for you, Luke, you deserve to be happy after everything you’ve gone through
Casey Hughes: I told you we’ll get married when you get out of medical school, woman!
Reid Oliver: The same.
Luke Oliver: I was going to post lyrics to Still The One for Reid and I’s anniversary until I remembered that Shania divorced the man she wrote that about.
Reid Oliver: Apparently no longer the one.
Luke Oliver: I didn’t want to curse us
Luke Oliver: On average, humans have one testicle.
Katie Hughes: Ohhhh! Clever
Alison Stewart: heh
Reid Oliver: Who knew Hank was average
Henry Coleman: hahahaha Reid
Chris Hughes: I don’t get it. Are a lot of men born with one testicle?
Reid Oliver: Yes ladies and gentlemen, he is a doctor!
Katie Hughes: Now I am starting to worry
Casey Hughes: I don’t get it either
Luke Oliver: It’s my sober birthday today so if anyone wants to come to AA tonight let me know.
Lily Snyder: Tell me when and where and your father and I will be there.
Lucinda Walsh: I am coming with your parents.
Reid Oliver: I am seriously going to try to be there.
Gretchen Taylor: He’ll be there Luke.
Luke Oliver: Going to watch Downton Abbey and then go to sleep
Maddie Coleman: OMG How far have you watched?
Luke Oliver: I’m finishing up season 2 now
Maddie Coleman: What episode are you on?
Luke Oliver: 7
Maddie Coleman: Did the soldier come yet who says he’s Patrick
Luke Oliver: Yeah, what’s up with that? It was so random. He came and went and it barely had a point. Hopefully there’ll be more with him in season 3
Maddie Coleman: I know! Do you believe him though?
Luke Oliver: Would it matter though if Mary has a baby boy? Wouldn’t he become the heir then? I don’t really get how all this stuff works, I just love their accents. And Thomas.
Reid Oliver: Of course you love Thomas he’s a bad boy, you like tough guys
Maddie Coleman: I like the chauffer guy and the girl who marries him
Luke Oliver: They get married what!?!
Maddie Coleman: OMG SORRY LUKE!
Luke Oliver: Shh no more talking until I finish this!
Luke Oliver: Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!
Jade Taylor: Have a good one Luke
Maddie Coleman: Sucks about the snow, I was going to drive out to Oakdale this year. Maybe Christmas. Have a good Thanksgiving, Luke. Say Hi to all the Snyders for me!
Casey Hughes: Too bad we’ll miss this one, Luke. Have a good one, man.
Noah Mayer: Happy Thanksgiving, Luke. Have fun with the squash
Natalie Snyder: Will you please tell Reid not to cut the squash this year? He takes forever!
Reid Oliver: I don’t do messy work!
Natalie Snyder: It’s a squash not a skull!
Luke Oliver: Jackson Holden Snyder was born today at 6:54am weighting 7lbs 2oz 20 inches. Faith and baby are doing terrific! Pics to come!
Noah Mayer: Congrats, Luke! You’re an uncle now! I’ll try to make it to Oakdale this Christmas to see the little one. Give Faith my love
Alison Stewart: I can’t wait to see the little one!
Maddie Coleman: Can’t believe Faith is a mother! And you’re an uncle! Put up pictures ASAP!
Reg Addington: Do you give cigars to the person if they become an uncle or is that only when they become a father? Congrats Luke! And Faith!
Luke Oliver: Best Christmas Ever! Great seeing Noah Mayer, Maddie Coleman, Casey Hughes, Alison Stewart, again. Thanks for coming you guys! Also first Christmas with little Jackson!
Noah Mayer: Good to see you again too, Luke
Maddie Coleman: I’ll try to make it out more often.
Casey Hughes: It’s so stupid we don’t hang out more, Alison and I don’t live that far away. I guess with her in medical school and me in law school, we get so wrapped up in our own lives. We need to take more time out and come visit the family.
Luke Oliver: Or move back :)
Casey Hughes: We’ve actually thought about that, when Alison is ready for an internship and I’m done with school
Luke Oliver: I know Reid would hire her.
Reid Oliver: I only hire competent people
Luke Oliver: Reid you worked with her for months before they moved away
Reid Oliver: I stick by my statement
Luke Oliver: *rolls eyes* Don’t worry Casey, you both have jobs here if you come back, you can work for Damien’s shipping company if you want and Reid will hire Alison.
Casey Hughes: Thanks Luke. It would be great to come back. Especially if that means I get to annoy Dr Evil some more
Reid Oliver: Oh gee can’t wait
Luke Oliver: Cozing by the fire, Cerebellum curled up beside me, waiting for Reid to get home from the hospital. #domesticbliss
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Luke Oliver: Happy New Year’s Eve everyone! This has been a great year! I became an uncle! What could top that?
Reid Oliver: Becoming a father?
Katie Hughes: Gasp!
Author: Hotlen
Rating: PG-13 (sexual references)
Summary: This will be a series of Facebook status updates by Luke and then the comments. I’m not awesome skilled so it’s not formatted like Facebook with pictures as I know someone else did, so imagine it with me.
YEAR 4: Natalie is 15 almost 16 this year, Faith is 20, Ethan is 10. Luke is 25, Reid is 37, year is 2014
Luke Oliver: The start of a new year.
Katie Hughes: I hope you have a better one than last year!
Luke Oliver: I think I will. And thanks again for getting me a job at WOAK.
Katie Hughes: Anything to help my sort-of-cousin-slash-sort-of-brother-in-law.
Lucinda Walsh: My boy, I think you’ll have a wonderful new year!
Reg Addington: I think you need to spend more time banging your husband.
Luke Oliver: Reg!
Lucinda Walsh: I couldn’t agree more.
Luke Oliver: Grandmother!
Reid Oliver: What sage advice.
Luke Oliver: Reid you have nothing to complain about.
Reid Oliver: Last year I was practically in a desert of sexlessness. You have a lot of making up to do, Snyder.
Katie Hughes: Let me know when this takes place!
Reg Addington: Ditto
Reid Oliver: I’m so glad I don’t still live with you. Do you know I didn’t get into Luke’s pants until we moved in together? Either Mama Lily was downstairs, Grandma Emma had her rules, or you had your ear up to the door. Luke refused all my advances!
Reg Addington: For shame, Luke. I wouldn’t care who heard me or what sort of rules there were, if I had a man like Reid you’d be sure that we’d be hitting it day and night.
Reid Oliver: Why weren’t you telling that to Luke before?
Reg Addington: I had no idea you were having this problem.
Casey Hughes: Who knew Luke Snyder was such a prude. haha
Luke Oliver: Alright, all of you stop it. I’m sorry I don’t want my mom, my grandmother or my sort-of-cousin listening to me having sex with Reid for the first time.
Casey Hughes: Doesn’t your mom own a hotel?
Reid Oliver: Thank you!
Noah Mayer: Well, we waited two years so…
Luke Oliver: That ain’t my fault.
Reid Oliver: I could barely last two months. I could have done a study on the effect of blue balls on a person’s psyche.
Casey Hughes: What were your remedies, Reid? I might need them with Alison at the hospital 24/7
Luke Oliver: This conversation is O-V-E-R
Reid Oliver: Here are a list of things I did when Luke wouldn’t have sex with me: Pocket hockey, Spanking the monkey, Playing the skin flute, Fly fishing, Going blind (sorry Noah, but now I understand how you came to be in that circumstance. Is “fireworks” a euphemism for Luke’s sexually charged body?), Playing a little five-on-one, and for those of you medically inclined, testing for testicular cancer?
Luke Oliver: All I can do at this point is shake my head solemnly and mutter, “this is the man I married”.
Reid Oliver: Lucky.
Luke Oliver: Indeed.
Luke Oliver is now friends with Jade Taylor
Jade Taylor wrote “I know we haven’t talked in years, which is appalling. Casey told me about your relapse into alcohol, but he says you’re doing better now. Maybe I’ll come back to Oakdale for the holidays. Meet this doctor of yours.
Luke Oliver: It is so great to hear from you again. I’ll call you this weekend and we can catch up!
Luke Oliver: My new years resolution: I want to start working out. Not because I think I’m fat, mom, but I want abs.
Casey Hughes: HA! Luke with abs!
Maddie Coleman: Aww little Luke with abs. You’d be so cute!
Jade Taylor: What in the world would possess you to want abs, Luke?
Reid Oliver: He’s jealous of mine.
Luke Oliver: Thank you all for laughing.
Jade Taylor: You look like a little kid. Have you ever seen a little kid with abs? It’s disturbing.
Luke Oliver: Forget you all. I’ll show you. I’m going to get abs and I’ll look extremely hot.
Reid Oliver: You do look extremely hot.
Casey Hughes: Yeah, even I went gay for you.
Noah Mayer: What do you want with abs anyway?
Luke Oliver: I want them, idk, I’ve never had them. You have them, God knows Reid has them, Casey has them, why can’t I?
Casey Hughes: Because you’re too adorable Lookie-wookie.
Luke Oliver: Fine, forget I said anything.
Katie Hughes: Luke, you’re hot. You know I think so. Your charm is that you’re hot without all the muscles. There’s no way else to put it but you’re hot.
Luke Oliver: I get it, Katie, thanks.
Reid Oliver: Damn right you’re hot.
Luke Oliver wrote “Congratulations Faithie!” on Faith Snyder’s wall
Faith Snyder: I’m going to be a mother will you please not call me Faithie?
Luke Oliver: I can’t believe you are going to be a mom!
Reid Oliver: I can’t believe you got pregnant by your cousin.
Luke Oliver: For the last time, Parker’s not related Reid!
Reid Oliver: You grew up as cousins!
Faith Snyder: Shut up Reid.
Reid Oliver: I will never understand Oakhell
Luke Oliver is now friends with Parker Snyder
Luke Oliver wrote, “I know you’re a good person but as the older brother I have to say, if you hurt Faith in any way I will make Reid give you a lobotomy with no anesthesia
Parker Snyder: She’s carrying my child, I could never hurt her, Luke
Luke Oliver: Yeah well I know what kind of wonderful (that was sarcastic) role models our parents have been, so I hope you know better
Parker Snyder: I also have the role model of you and Reid
Luke Oliver: My bath gel keeps running out mysteriously early. I think Reid is stealing it.
Casey Hughes: He wants to smell pretty too!
Henry Coleman: I knew he smelled different lately
Luke Oliver: Um, why are you sniffing my husband?
Katie Hughes: Yeah Henry, why?
Henry Coleman: Oh shut up
Reid Oliver: I’m adding this to the growing list of reasons why Hank is in love with me
Luke Oliver: Valentines Day! Hahaha, Reid asked me to marry him. He forgot he already did that! Cutest thing ever! And then he said, “At least you know now I’d do it again if I had to” awwwww <3
Katie Hughes: That is the sweetest thing ever
Lucinda Walsh: I knew that man was brilliant! I’m so glad you found him, Luke
Luke Oliver: We all have Damien to thank for that
Lily Snyder: Why Damien?
Luke Oliver: He was the one who told me to pretend I had blackmail on Reid to get him to come to Oakdalde for Noah’s surgery
Reid Oliver: I knew you were bluffing!
Noah Mayer: What I’m worried about is what Reid actually thought you had on him? You had to believe him about something, Reid.
Lucinda Walsh: Noah, dear, shut up
Reid Oliver wrote “This is for your EX. I’m posting it here because he and I are not as you call “Facebook Friends” and therefore he can see it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eR7-AUmiNcA&ob=av3e” on Luke Oliver’s wall
Noah Mayer: Mature Reid
Reid Oliver: Sometimes I have to stoop down to your level
Casey Hughes: Ouch
Luke Oliver: You have to admit, Noah, that song really does hit a few nerves
Casey Hughes: Double ouch
Luke Oliver: Spring Break! Leaving tomorrow for cabins in Copper Harbor! Renting a big van for Reid and I, Natalie, Ethan, mom and dad. This is going to be interesting!
Henry Coleman: Oh do take video, Luke
Chris Hughes: I hope everyone survives
Reid Oliver: Help me.
Luke Oliver: Passed mile 69. Reid won’t stop laughing.
Jade Taylor: What part of the 69 are you?
Natalie Snyder: I don’t get it, why is 69 so funny to Reid?
Luke Oliver: If anyone explains that to her I will get Damien to kill you
Casey Hughes: RAWR Mr. Grimaldi comes out to play
Reid Oliver: You told Casey about our role play?
Casey Hughes: EW TMI!
Luke Oliver: Stop it you two, Natalie won’t stop asking about 69 and now Ethan’s joined in
Luke Oliver: Phew they stopped
Alison Stewart: What finally got them to stop asking?
Luke Oliver: Reid came up with some really boring medical terminology and the kids fell asleep.
Reid Oliver: Hey! I was trying to educate them. Would you rather me explain to them what 69 means in sexual terminology?
Natalie Snyder wrote, “If we have to stop one more time for you I’m going to smack you upside the head” on Luke Snyder’s wall
Reid Oliver: At least we know his kidney is working.
Natalie Snyder: Ever the doctor, Reid.
Casey Hughes wrote “Are you and Reid talking to each other via Facebook while in the same car?” on Luke Oliver’s wall
Luke Oliver: Mom made a rule that Reid and I can’t sit together in the car. Someone can’t keep his hands to himself.
Reid Oliver: They have a mind of their own.
Reid Oliver: It’s not my fault that your mom has a problem with me making out with her little baby boy.
Faith Snyder: Look, I know my family and all of Oakdale is screwed up, and I am having a baby with my sort-of cousin, but you making out with Ethan, no matter what sort of deep soul connection you have, is down right disgusting.
Reid Oliver: Oh HAHA Faith. I hope your kid isn’t born with 4 arms and 12 toes.
Faith Snyder: If he is I’m naming him Reid after the person who doomed him to that fate.
Luke Oliver: You’re having a boy!?!
Faith Snyder: No, chill down Luke.
Luke Oliver: Natalie decided that this would be the perfect time for her to practice expressway driving, and my father agreed. Reid is terrified, but I promised him she wouldn’t drive near any train tracks.
Katie Hughes: Train tracks?
Luke Oliver: It’s an inside joke between us.
Reid Oliver: He had a creepy dream about me one night years ago and now I’m freaked out about train tracks.
Luke Oliver: He refuses to drive near them
Reid Oliver: Please can we stop talking about them, ugh
Luke Oliver: Let’s just say that watching my husband build a bon fire is the sexiest thing alive.
Reid Oliver: how else am I going to devour s’mores?
Casey Hughes: And wieners.
Reid Oliver: I don’t need a bon fire to devour those.
Casey Hughes: Excellent.
Reid Oliver wrote “One of these days I’m going to burn your fortress pajamas.” on Luke Oliver’s wall
Casey Hughes: Fortress pajamas?
Luke Oliver: That’s what Reid calls the pajamas I wear when I don’t want to have sex with him.
Reid Oliver: He’s worn them every night we’ve been in the cabin.
Luke Oliver: My parents and my siblings are in connected rooms!
Luke Oliver: Reid in a canoe. That is all. (please see attached picture)
Henry Coleman: Who knew a canoe would bring down the great Dr. Oliver? He looks terrified!
Chris Hughes: Reid in an over sized life jacket is the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen in my life. You look like an idiot.
Katie Hughes: Oh. My. God.
Faith Snyder: Priceless picture is priceless
Gretchen Taylor: Wait until the nurses see this!
Luke Oliver: Then we tipped over “accidentally”. (see attached photo of wet Reid)
Reid Oliver: I knew you did that on purpose!
Henry Coleman: You look like a drowned rat. Finally the real Dr. Oliver comes out.
Reid Oliver: I thought I already came out to you when you asked me on a date? You wanted to frisk me remember?
Henry Coleman: I’m not gay!
Maddie Coleman: Henry, you know he’s just trying to rile you up
Reid Oliver: No, I do not want Hank to get excited and aroused
Katie Hughes: Reid, can’t you leave him alone?
Reid Oliver: But it’s so fun
Luke Oliver: Aww he’s pouting. Reid how about I promise to take off the fortress pajamas tonight if you will leave Henry alone from now on about the gay stuff.
Reid Oliver: Hank is the straightest butchest man I have ever met.
Luke Oliver: Got back from picking cherries at Kings Orchard.
Reid Oliver: Now popping cherries back at the cabin.
Noah Mayer: I think I already did that awhile ago.
Reid Oliver: Luke has many many more cherries to pop.
Jade Taylor: I knew Luke was a kinky guy. People who act that innocent usually are.
Reid Oliver: You wouldn’t believe the sick twisted things he likes in bed.
Luke Oliver: *eye roll* Reid you are embellishing.
Reid Oliver: Embellishing my cock into your tight ass.
Luke Oliver: REID!
Jade Taylor: Wow…
Luke Oliver: You are going to get blocked, seriously.
Reid Oliver: You’re gay Luke, like they don’t know what you do.
Luke Oliver: I’m not talking about this here. You’re in the same cabin as me, come into the living room and talk to me in person.
Katie Hughes: D.R.A.M.A
Chris Hughes: I knew Oakdale would get to Reid sooner or later.
Reid Oliver has sent you a game request on Top Doc
Luke Oliver: Really, Reid?
Reid Oliver: Can you believe Katie even beat Doogie’s score on this game?
Katie Hughes: It has nothing to do with skill all you do is click buttons.
Luke Oliver: You’re the only one who understands the stupid game now stop sending me friend requests, I’m not playing.
Luke Oliver: OK this made me laugh: It has been brought to my attention that the stick figure decals on the back windows of vehicles are NOT pedestrian "kill" scores, but, actually are meant to represent members of your family. I'll be removing mine ASAP to avoid any further confusion.
Jade Taylor: HA! Priceless!
Lily Snyder: Luke that’s terrible!
Kevin Davis: haha that’s funny!
Casey Hughes: heh awesome
Reid Oliver: I bet they make special decals like that for Oakdale. They have transparent people that depending on the weather will appear and then disappear, and rearrange themselves every month
Henry Coleman: And one is secretly gay, right?
Reid Oliver: Yes, one wears a pink and orange flowered shirt, just for you Hank.
Luke Oliver: Don’t freak people I just thought it was funny.
Kevin Davis: Funny coz it’s true!
Luke Oliver: I am now 26!
Casey Hughes: Happy birthday, Luke! Can’t wait for your party this weekend.
Lily Snyder: Baby, I can’t believe how old you are! You’re a man now!
Luke Oliver: Mom, you say that every year
Holden Snyder: Wait until you have kids, Luke, sometimes you forget how old they are, you can’t help seeing them as the little child you brought into this world.
Reid Oliver: Gross. And don’t get him started on kids. We have a dog.
Katie Snyder: Happy birthday, Luke! And don’t listen to Reid, we all know how he really feels about kids
Jade Taylor: Happy Birthday Cuz!
Maddie Coleman: Happy birthday Luke! Hope you have a great party!
Noah Mayer: Happy birthday Luke! Maybe this summer I can come out and visit while I’m between projects
Luke Oliver: I’d love to see you again, Noah. You too Maddie. Working at WOAK reminds me every day of the fun times the three of us spent together
Reid Oliver: When Noah was sleeping with Maddie and you were depressed and miserable, but then Noah kissed you and then pretended it was a joke, and then you stole Noah away from Maddie who became heart broken and then Noah’s father nearly killed you? Those fun times?
Maddie Coleman: I think we can all say we’ve made our peace with what happened
Noah Mayer: Yeah, besides if it wasn’t for me getting blind then you wouldn’t know Luke, so basically, you owe me one.
Reid Oliver: If I ever owed you anything Noah hell would be frozen over
Luke Oliver: Guys, it’s my birthday, please don’t argue
Noah Mayer: Sorry Luke
Lucinda Walsh: Well ,well, I guess old scars don’t heal so well after all. Happy birthday my darling boy! I will see you at the Lake View for lunch at noon.
Luke Oliver: Studying for finals, I thought this was appropriate: Texting + Facebook = Textbook … so I'm studying right?
Reid Oliver: What’s studying?
Luke Oliver: ha ha genius.
Faith Snyder: I applaud that you know what texting is, Reid.
Reid Oliver: I learned it quickly when Luke said that people use it for sexting
Faith Snyder: gross
Luke Oliver: School’s out for the summer!
Holden Snyder: One more year son!
Faith Snyder: Thank God! I’m about to burst! If I had to sit through another non-air conditioned class with this child kicking at my intestines I would have gone insane!
Reid Oliver: I still can’t believe you are carrying your own cousins child
Luke Oliver: Reid!
Faith Snyder: It’s ok Luke, Reid has womb envy.
Reid Oliver: Womb envy? No, if anyone has womb envy it would be your brother
Faith Snyder: Ew, I don’t need to know my brother’s position in bed
Luke Oliver: Faith!
Reid Oliver: We take turns :)
Luke Oliver: Reid!
Casey Hughes: Go Luke!
Reg Addington: Damn, I need a cigarette.
Luke Oliver: I am closing this discussion!
Luke Oliver: “Firepit fun at my house Saturday night, 7:30-ish. Hotdogs and S'mores! Who's in?!
Reid Oliver: Am I invited?
Casey Hughes: no Reid
Reid Oliver: :(
Reg Addington: Should we let Reid come?
Luke Oliver: I don’t know. Let’s take a vote.
Reid Oliver: I vote maybe.
Reg Addington: I vote to let him come, but he’s the one we’ll make run down the street naked when things get wild :p
Casey Hughes: Make him? I bet he’s already planning on doing it
Reid Oliver: … I am
Luke Oliver: Reid are you coming?
Reid Oliver: I am indeed coming
Casey Hughes: sick dude! Stop turning something fun into something dirty.
Reid Oliver: :P
Luke Oliver: I might change the time a bit. I want it to be close to dark time and I’m not sure what time it gets dark
Reg Addington: lol dark time
Reid Oliver: They call it night
Reg Addington: It gets dark around 8 here
Luke Oliver: So, 7L30 it is
Luke Oliver: 7:30
Casey Hughes: I want to write my time like that 7L30, looks like a new language.
Reid Oliver: I take it back, even the temptation of s’mores can’t get me to hang out with your friends for an evening.
Luke Oliver: Taking Cerebellum on a walk with Reid. I love warm summer nights
Alison Stewart: He’s so domestic
Casey Hughes: Yeah, you trained him well, Luke
Luke Oliver: Well it took some time, slowly but surely he got the idea
Reid Oliver: You better be talking about the dog
Casey Hughes: Dog?
Alison Stewart: lol
Reg Addington wrote “Summer Nights reminds me of the song from Grease” on Luke Oliver’s wall
Reid Oliver: Summer lovin’ had me a blast
Luke Oliver: Summer lovin’ happened so fast
Reid Oliver: I met a boy crazy for me
Luke Oliver: Met a boy, cute as can be. Summer days drifting away to uh oh those summer nights
Reg Addington: Tell me more! Tell me more!
Katie Hughes: Did you get very far?
Alison Stewart: like does he drive a car?
Reid Oliver: he swam by me, he got a cramp
Luke Oliver: He ran by me, got my suit damp
Reid Oliver: I saved his life (because I’m a doctor duh) he nearly drowned
Luke Oliver: He showed off, splashing around. Summer sun something’s begun but uh oh those summer nights
Reg Addington: Tell me more tell me more!
Alison Stewart: Was it love at first sight?
Katie Hughes: Did he put up a fight?
Reid Oliver: Took him bowling in the arcade
Luke Oliver: We went strolling, drank lemonade
Reid Oliver: We made out under the dock
Luke Oliver: We stayed out, till 10 o’clock! Summer fling don’t mean a thing but uh oh those summer nights!
Reg Addington: Tell me more! Tell me more!
Katie Hughes: But you don’t gotta brag
Alison Stewart: Coz he sounds like a drag
Luke Oliver: He got friendly holding my hand
Reid Oliver: Well he got friendly down in the sand
Luke Oliver: He was sweet just turned 18
Reid Oliver: Well he was good, you know what I mean!
Luke Oliver: Summer heat boy and boy meet but uh oh those summer nights
Reg Addington: Tell me more tell me more!
Alison Stewart: How much dough did he spend?
Katie Hughes: Could he get me a friend?
Reid Oliver: It turned colder that’s where it ends
Luke Oliver: So I told him we’d still be friends
Reid Oliver: Then we made our true love vow
Luke Oliver: Wonder what he’s doing now? Summer dreams, ripped at the seams
Reid Oliver: But oh, those summer nights!!!!
Faith Snyder: Reid wishes he just turned 18.
Katie Hughes: How did you get Reid to do that Luke?
Luke Oliver: promises of blowjobs on the beach can get Reid to do basically anything
Reg Addington: Tell me more! Tell me more!
Reid Oliver: Like you’d agree to that. You hacked into my FB account
Luke Oliver: For my husband
Gretchen Taylor: Ha! Hopefully not from me anymore
Reid Oliver: Can you print that to poster size so I can put it on the bulletin board at the nurses’ station?
Casey Hughes wrote “I found one for your husband too!
”
on Luke Oliver’s wall
Luke Oliver: HA!
Chris Hughes: Ain’t that the truth
Katie Hughes: Come on now, he’s getting better
Henry Coleman: Is he bubbles, really?
Katie Hughes: What did he do this time Henry?
Chris Hughes: What hasn’t he done?
Reg Addington: Me!
Reid Oliver wrote “Yeah well I found one for your mother
”
on Luke Oliver’s wall
Jade Taylor: So true
Luke Oliver: Reid be nice!
Noah Mayer: He does sort of have a point, Luke.
Reid Oliver: Your mom’s breasts are practically on display when she picks up the kids from school! Who is she trying to show those off to Luke, the kindergarteners?
Faith Snyder: Well if she was she’d be taking after you
Reid Oliver: Oh hahaha another cradle robbing joke. At least the person I decided to spend the rest of my life with has a different last name than me.
Faith Snyder: Oh haha another cousin joke
Luke Oliver: Reid, really, stop it
Casey Hughes: Ut oh, Reid is in the dog house now
Luke Oliver: “That’s what.” - She
Casey Hughes: Cute, Luke
Reid Oliver: What?
Casey Hughes: *smacks head on desk*
Reg Addington: hahaha! Brilliant!
Jade Taylor: Awesome. You’re so clever Luke.
Kevin Davis: man you are blowing my mind
Reid Oliver: Let us hope that is all he is blowing on you
Kevin Davis: Sick dude
Reid Oliver: Why do you hang out with these people, Luke?
Katie Hughes: That’s really funny, Luke.
Chris Hughes: I bet he didn’t think of it himself
Reid Oliver: I still don’t get what all the fuss is about
Casey Hughes: THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!!1 OMG THANK YOU REID THAT WAS PERFECT!!!!
Luke Oliver: Bwahahahaa!
Reid Oliver: Why did I marry a teenage girl?
Luke Oliver: Today is Reid’s 38th birthday. Watch out all nurses and doctors and others who have to be around him today. Reid is not pleased.
Faith Snyder: Luke, I think you forgot the 1.
Reid Oliver: Oh hahahaha yes Faith I’m 138. Someone really did drop you on the head as a child or maybe it was all the pot you smoked at boarding school
Luke Oliver: Faith knock it off, I told you Reid’s in a bad mood.
Luke Oliver: Reid just informed me that Please Please Me is about oral sex. I cannot listen to another Beatles song for awhile. My childhood is broken
Maddie Coleman: Oh ew! I never realized!
Luke Oliver: They all have new meanings now! I can’t!
Natalie Oliver: Ew Luke! Why did you post that?
Luke Oliver: I had to share, it was too much for me to keep to myself!
Casey Hughes: DUH LUKE It’s actually more about NOT getting oral and wanting it. “I don’t want to sound complaining but you know there’s always rain in my heart, I do all the pleasing with you it’s so hard to reason with you, oh yeah, why do you make me blue.” Blue balls. Coz he’s not getting any.
Luke Oliver: Do girls not really do it or something?
Casey Hughes: Not usually, at least, not any I’ve had
Reid Oliver: Another perk of being gay
Gretchen Taylor wrote “I thought this was good for your husband: I think I was mistaken when my boss told me he liked to see me hard at work”
Luke Oliver: HA!
Reid Oliver: I do like to see Luke hard at work
Gretchen Taylor: I know, I’m the one who has to guard the door to your office!
Katie Hughes: Kinky
Jade Taylor: Wanky
Chris Hughes: Gross Reid
Reid Oliver: Don’t be jealous just because Katie won’t come to the hospital and give you head.
Casey Hughes: TMI on everything!!
Luke Oliver: You’re just jealous. Maybe if you actually married Alison she’d be more willing to have sex with you.
Casey Hughes: I’m not going to be pressured into marrying her
Reid Oliver: Haven’t you been engaged for 4 years?
Alison Stewart: Exactly, Reid
Luke Oliver: After all these year, after all these tears between us. Still I couldn’t find someone half as right as you. And each time I stop to think what it is I really need. Then I must conclude all I really need is you Happy 2 year anniversary sweetheart!
Lily Snyder: Congrats Luke!
Jade Taylor: 2 years already! Wow Luke!
Reg Addington: Two years and still no threesome together ;) congrats Luke! You lucky SOB
Natalie Snyder: Only 2 years? I can’t even remember a time when Reid wasn’t with us, or maybe it’s just that I don’t want to.
Lucinda Walsh: Here, here Natalie! I completely agree!
Alison Stewart: And yet I am still not married. Happy for you, Luke, you deserve to be happy after everything you’ve gone through
Casey Hughes: I told you we’ll get married when you get out of medical school, woman!
Reid Oliver: The same.
Luke Oliver: I was going to post lyrics to Still The One for Reid and I’s anniversary until I remembered that Shania divorced the man she wrote that about.
Reid Oliver: Apparently no longer the one.
Luke Oliver: I didn’t want to curse us
Luke Oliver: On average, humans have one testicle.
Katie Hughes: Ohhhh! Clever
Alison Stewart: heh
Reid Oliver: Who knew Hank was average
Henry Coleman: hahahaha Reid
Chris Hughes: I don’t get it. Are a lot of men born with one testicle?
Reid Oliver: Yes ladies and gentlemen, he is a doctor!
Katie Hughes: Now I am starting to worry
Casey Hughes: I don’t get it either
Luke Oliver: It’s my sober birthday today so if anyone wants to come to AA tonight let me know.
Lily Snyder: Tell me when and where and your father and I will be there.
Lucinda Walsh: I am coming with your parents.
Reid Oliver: I am seriously going to try to be there.
Gretchen Taylor: He’ll be there Luke.
Luke Oliver: Going to watch Downton Abbey and then go to sleep
Maddie Coleman: OMG How far have you watched?
Luke Oliver: I’m finishing up season 2 now
Maddie Coleman: What episode are you on?
Luke Oliver: 7
Maddie Coleman: Did the soldier come yet who says he’s Patrick
Luke Oliver: Yeah, what’s up with that? It was so random. He came and went and it barely had a point. Hopefully there’ll be more with him in season 3
Maddie Coleman: I know! Do you believe him though?
Luke Oliver: Would it matter though if Mary has a baby boy? Wouldn’t he become the heir then? I don’t really get how all this stuff works, I just love their accents. And Thomas.
Reid Oliver: Of course you love Thomas he’s a bad boy, you like tough guys
Maddie Coleman: I like the chauffer guy and the girl who marries him
Luke Oliver: They get married what!?!
Maddie Coleman: OMG SORRY LUKE!
Luke Oliver: Shh no more talking until I finish this!
Luke Oliver: Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!
Jade Taylor: Have a good one Luke
Maddie Coleman: Sucks about the snow, I was going to drive out to Oakdale this year. Maybe Christmas. Have a good Thanksgiving, Luke. Say Hi to all the Snyders for me!
Casey Hughes: Too bad we’ll miss this one, Luke. Have a good one, man.
Noah Mayer: Happy Thanksgiving, Luke. Have fun with the squash
Natalie Snyder: Will you please tell Reid not to cut the squash this year? He takes forever!
Reid Oliver: I don’t do messy work!
Natalie Snyder: It’s a squash not a skull!
Luke Oliver: Jackson Holden Snyder was born today at 6:54am weighting 7lbs 2oz 20 inches. Faith and baby are doing terrific! Pics to come!
Noah Mayer: Congrats, Luke! You’re an uncle now! I’ll try to make it to Oakdale this Christmas to see the little one. Give Faith my love
Alison Stewart: I can’t wait to see the little one!
Maddie Coleman: Can’t believe Faith is a mother! And you’re an uncle! Put up pictures ASAP!
Reg Addington: Do you give cigars to the person if they become an uncle or is that only when they become a father? Congrats Luke! And Faith!
Luke Oliver: Best Christmas Ever! Great seeing Noah Mayer, Maddie Coleman, Casey Hughes, Alison Stewart, again. Thanks for coming you guys! Also first Christmas with little Jackson!
Noah Mayer: Good to see you again too, Luke
Maddie Coleman: I’ll try to make it out more often.
Casey Hughes: It’s so stupid we don’t hang out more, Alison and I don’t live that far away. I guess with her in medical school and me in law school, we get so wrapped up in our own lives. We need to take more time out and come visit the family.
Luke Oliver: Or move back :)
Casey Hughes: We’ve actually thought about that, when Alison is ready for an internship and I’m done with school
Luke Oliver: I know Reid would hire her.
Reid Oliver: I only hire competent people
Luke Oliver: Reid you worked with her for months before they moved away
Reid Oliver: I stick by my statement
Luke Oliver: *rolls eyes* Don’t worry Casey, you both have jobs here if you come back, you can work for Damien’s shipping company if you want and Reid will hire Alison.
Casey Hughes: Thanks Luke. It would be great to come back. Especially if that means I get to annoy Dr Evil some more
Reid Oliver: Oh gee can’t wait
Luke Oliver: Cozing by the fire, Cerebellum curled up beside me, waiting for Reid to get home from the hospital. #domesticbliss
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Luke Oliver: Happy New Year’s Eve everyone! This has been a great year! I became an uncle! What could top that?
Reid Oliver: Becoming a father?
Katie Hughes: Gasp!