The Light That I'd Bless 32/??
Author: mybabci a/k/a vintagelamb
Title: The Light that I'd Bless
Genre/Type: Fix-it Romance with some angst sprinkled in here, there and everywhere
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17 depending on chapter
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid...who else is there?
Disclaimers: I own nothing, I know nothing
Warning: A healthy dose of angst. It's not always going to be rainbows and unicorns, friends. But it will all be fixed!
Chapter 32
The hours after the MRI were the worst of Reid’s life, and he’d had some shit days in the past. Watching Katie disintegrate before his eyes tore him to shreds.
She’d been sitting in the family waiting room, flanked by Luke, Simon and Hank . Reid insisted on being the one to tell her. She deserved to hear it from someone who loved her and her son. He made every effort to be practical, giving her the facts, avoiding sentiment as much as possible.
Katie, the tumor is in Jacob’s cerebellum, the area that controls balance and coordination, which is why Jacob has been falling a lot lately. Right now, it is also causing increased pressure in his brain, hence the headaches.
Unfortunately, it is fairly large and pressing on areas that affect brain function, so he will need surgery to remove as much of it as possible.
Complete removal may not be feasible without damaging the surrounding tissue , in which case, Jacob will need radiation after the surgery in order to try to shrink the remainder of the tumor.
Reid watched as Katie attempted to assimilate the information, her eyes darting back and forth, her body buckling under the weight of her grief and fear.
Reid, is it…does my son have cancer?
He reached out to support her as her legs gave out from under her.
I’m not going to sugarcoat things, sweetheart, it is a possibility that the tumor is malignant. We won’t know until they go in and biopsy it during surgery. If they find cancer cells, they would most likely also treat Jacob with chemotherapy after the surgery.
I can tell you that the majority of cerebellar astrocytomas are benign, so let‘s not go there right now.
Katie’s eyes pleaded with Reid to go on.
The big concern right now is the fact that the tumor is large and needs to be addressed immediately to avoid further trauma to Jacob‘s central nervous system and permanant damage.
Katie interrupted.
But, you said that you didn’t think removing the entire tumor was possible?
Reid nodded.
It’s not completely impossible, but the surgery would be difficult at best and there would be no guarantees going in.
Like I said, it is probable that radiation would be necessary to try to eradicate whatever remains.
Katie shook her head.
Reid, radiation is dangerous, even for adults. What would it do to a baby like Jacob?
Reid put his hands on her shoulders.
You’re right, radiation is not ideal. Luckily, most of the side effects are temporary. But, it may have some long-term effects on Jacob’s growth and development.
Unfortunately, it‘s really the best bet for getting rid of the remaining tumor once they‘ve gotten as much as they can with surgery.
Katie looked Reid in the eye.
You keep saying “they”, Reid. What about you?
Could you remove the entire tumor?
You walked around here like the Foghorn Leghorn of neurosurgery for months…is this something you would have taken on?
Reid dropped his hands from her shoulders, his eyes averting her gaze.
You know that I’m not an option, Katie. I don’t know that I’ll ever feel confident enough to return to the operating room. We’ve talked about this.
I can be here for you the whole way, though. I can translate all of the medical jargon, and I can help you make decisions as they come up.
Reid offered her what he hoped was a reassuring smile and moved to put his arms around Katie, but she blocked him with her hands, pushing against his chest, as she choked on her sobs.
Fuck you.
You listen to me, Reid Oliver.
I don’t need your friendship right now. I don’t want you holding my hand through this ordeal, I don’t need you smoothing my hair back the way you do when I’m upset. I have no use for your calming voice and I don't need you to manage me with your pragmatism.
I don’t want you to explain things to silly little me. I don’t want you to translate all the big words that I can’t possibly understand.
Don’t make sure I eat, don’t see to it that I get some sleep. I have people around me who can do all of those things, people I‘ve known a hell of a lot longer than I‘ve known you.
Right now, I need Dr. Oliver to save my son. You, Reid, can piss off because, here and now, you are of no use to me.
Reid looked down a the floor and quietly spoke.
The nurse will take you back to see Jacob now. He’s already coming out of the anesthesia.
With that, Reid slowly turned and walked away.
As he made his way to the lobby of the new wing, he felt a hand grasp his and turn him around. Luke’s teary eyes locked with Reid’s, caressing them, placating them, soothing them.
She doesn’t mean that, Reid, you know she doesn’t. She’s scared and she’s angry and she needs to vent all of that at someone.
Katie loves you, you’ve seen the evidence of that. And you know it right here.
Reid looked down at Luke’s hand on his chest as Luke continued.
But, she’s right, she has a lot of people around her to make sure that she’s taken care of. She has family and friends who will stick to her like glue through this.
What she needs more than anything else is for her son to get through this. Dr. Reid Oliver can make that happen…I know it and you know it. You can’t be just her friend right now…it’s not what she needs from you and it’s not your place in this. Your place is to fix it…that’s what you do.
A/N...Please take the medical stuff in this fic with a bubble of soap (get it...like a grain of salt...I slay me).
Title: The Light that I'd Bless
Genre/Type: Fix-it Romance with some angst sprinkled in here, there and everywhere
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17 depending on chapter
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid...who else is there?
Disclaimers: I own nothing, I know nothing
Warning: A healthy dose of angst. It's not always going to be rainbows and unicorns, friends. But it will all be fixed!
Chapter 32
The hours after the MRI were the worst of Reid’s life, and he’d had some shit days in the past. Watching Katie disintegrate before his eyes tore him to shreds.
She’d been sitting in the family waiting room, flanked by Luke, Simon and Hank . Reid insisted on being the one to tell her. She deserved to hear it from someone who loved her and her son. He made every effort to be practical, giving her the facts, avoiding sentiment as much as possible.
Katie, the tumor is in Jacob’s cerebellum, the area that controls balance and coordination, which is why Jacob has been falling a lot lately. Right now, it is also causing increased pressure in his brain, hence the headaches.
Unfortunately, it is fairly large and pressing on areas that affect brain function, so he will need surgery to remove as much of it as possible.
Complete removal may not be feasible without damaging the surrounding tissue , in which case, Jacob will need radiation after the surgery in order to try to shrink the remainder of the tumor.
Reid watched as Katie attempted to assimilate the information, her eyes darting back and forth, her body buckling under the weight of her grief and fear.
Reid, is it…does my son have cancer?
He reached out to support her as her legs gave out from under her.
I’m not going to sugarcoat things, sweetheart, it is a possibility that the tumor is malignant. We won’t know until they go in and biopsy it during surgery. If they find cancer cells, they would most likely also treat Jacob with chemotherapy after the surgery.
I can tell you that the majority of cerebellar astrocytomas are benign, so let‘s not go there right now.
Katie’s eyes pleaded with Reid to go on.
The big concern right now is the fact that the tumor is large and needs to be addressed immediately to avoid further trauma to Jacob‘s central nervous system and permanant damage.
Katie interrupted.
But, you said that you didn’t think removing the entire tumor was possible?
Reid nodded.
It’s not completely impossible, but the surgery would be difficult at best and there would be no guarantees going in.
Like I said, it is probable that radiation would be necessary to try to eradicate whatever remains.
Katie shook her head.
Reid, radiation is dangerous, even for adults. What would it do to a baby like Jacob?
Reid put his hands on her shoulders.
You’re right, radiation is not ideal. Luckily, most of the side effects are temporary. But, it may have some long-term effects on Jacob’s growth and development.
Unfortunately, it‘s really the best bet for getting rid of the remaining tumor once they‘ve gotten as much as they can with surgery.
Katie looked Reid in the eye.
You keep saying “they”, Reid. What about you?
Could you remove the entire tumor?
You walked around here like the Foghorn Leghorn of neurosurgery for months…is this something you would have taken on?
Reid dropped his hands from her shoulders, his eyes averting her gaze.
You know that I’m not an option, Katie. I don’t know that I’ll ever feel confident enough to return to the operating room. We’ve talked about this.
I can be here for you the whole way, though. I can translate all of the medical jargon, and I can help you make decisions as they come up.
Reid offered her what he hoped was a reassuring smile and moved to put his arms around Katie, but she blocked him with her hands, pushing against his chest, as she choked on her sobs.
Fuck you.
You listen to me, Reid Oliver.
I don’t need your friendship right now. I don’t want you holding my hand through this ordeal, I don’t need you smoothing my hair back the way you do when I’m upset. I have no use for your calming voice and I don't need you to manage me with your pragmatism.
I don’t want you to explain things to silly little me. I don’t want you to translate all the big words that I can’t possibly understand.
Don’t make sure I eat, don’t see to it that I get some sleep. I have people around me who can do all of those things, people I‘ve known a hell of a lot longer than I‘ve known you.
Right now, I need Dr. Oliver to save my son. You, Reid, can piss off because, here and now, you are of no use to me.
Reid looked down a the floor and quietly spoke.
The nurse will take you back to see Jacob now. He’s already coming out of the anesthesia.
With that, Reid slowly turned and walked away.
As he made his way to the lobby of the new wing, he felt a hand grasp his and turn him around. Luke’s teary eyes locked with Reid’s, caressing them, placating them, soothing them.
She doesn’t mean that, Reid, you know she doesn’t. She’s scared and she’s angry and she needs to vent all of that at someone.
Katie loves you, you’ve seen the evidence of that. And you know it right here.
Reid looked down at Luke’s hand on his chest as Luke continued.
But, she’s right, she has a lot of people around her to make sure that she’s taken care of. She has family and friends who will stick to her like glue through this.
What she needs more than anything else is for her son to get through this. Dr. Reid Oliver can make that happen…I know it and you know it. You can’t be just her friend right now…it’s not what she needs from you and it’s not your place in this. Your place is to fix it…that’s what you do.
A/N...Please take the medical stuff in this fic with a bubble of soap (get it...like a grain of salt...I slay me).