The Wicked Weekend Has Come to an End and the New Week has Begun!
Ahh peace! I love these times when I sit and write out what's on my mind. I was just outside a moment ago contemplating the nature of reality. Is reality truly as perceived by the individual? A myriad of multi-colored expression and interpretations? Or is there not another grande reality that transcends all perceptions? And if so, how does on experience reality in it's truest form? That would be an incredible experience. Anyhow, lol I'm laying in my bed waiting for my clothes to finish washing. I just cleaned the kitchen and made some tea for my sick grandmother, and have been having an incredible journey, experiencing the beauty within my own life and state of being that is not relative to the things happening around me. The weekend ended nicely, if not abrubtly. Arman and I are no longer talking. He sent me a messege saying that he wanted nothing more to do with me, which was a great thing because I felt much the same way. For the past few weeks I have not been much interested in him, and since our separation I feel like a leech has been removed from one of my vital organs. When I returned his books to him(our last ties) I felt an overwhelming since of relief and joy. I still love him, I've made it my will to love all people regardless of our interpersonal relationship, but that doesn't mean that we have to be around one another. I also decided on Sunday after meditating about my desires that I have inclinations towards having sex. I bought myself protection in case an opportunity should present itself. I don't wish to remain so closed of to that aspect of my humanity, but I will refrain from being reckless about it. I actually went on gay.com seeing if there were any interesting prospect on there, I did find some, but that wasn't the best part. I ended up talking to this guy who is slightly older and we had a really great conversation. He is a very wholesome guy, and very sweet and stable. I liked him enough to want to talk him more. I asked him for his number to which he replied that he doesn't give his number out, not even to people who he's talked to for years. I was persistent, and the end result was that I got his number and called him ten minutes later. We had more great conversation and were very natuaral and comfortable with one another. I definitely feel like we connected on a fairly deep level, and neither of us have any sexual intentions. We just want to become familiar with each other which a great great thing! I told him he should call me tomorrow and he replied that he didn't call people either lol. But the next day when I woke up I had a missed call and a message from him. He said he called my accident lol! So I called him back and left a voice mail teasing him about calling me back even if it was an accident! HAH. Then ten minutes later he called again and we talked for a long time. It's been really great. He's called me many times since then lol! Yesterday I went to the gym to capitalize on an offer that was made to me by the manager who I ran into on my campus.. He said I could upgrade my membership to an all access membership for just ten dollars more a month without any enrollment fees! So yesterday I picked up my cousin from work at the less than outstanding macy's store and we went to 24hour to talk to the manager. He tried to sign me up but had to apologize because he was mistaken and the offer had expired! He said it would come up again soon but as compensation for getting my hopes up he gave me a free gym membership for a month! How awesome! After that my cousins friend called to invite us out to club 21. I hate that club and suggested faces, but on wednsday it's all about the young arrogant pretentious 18-20 year olds, and so all the guys who would be at faces were trying to scam on the young ass at club 21 *sighs* pathetic! My cousins friend was only 20 anyway and couldn't get in. so we went over to club 21 after wasting over an hour or so figuring out what to do. And then the girl couldn't even get in! because she had been spotted getting tipsy before entering the club by LAVENDER SECURITY! How outrageous! So we bid her good bye and my cousin and I went to the Merc to get tipsy and have a good time! We ended up running into this hawaiian girl and her puerto rican husband! She was really cool and offered to have us come over and eat authentic Hawaiian food! YUMMY! After that I ran into Trey who as it turns out works with Gregorio(the guy I just met) at verizon! I was texting gregorio when I found out so he called. He and trey talked and trey gave him a really good review saying he's the kind of guy any guy would be lucky to have. AWWW how sweet! I talked to Gregorio for a while longer then I bid him good night because I was getting ready to drive and I know he hates to talk to me while I'm behind the wheel. Hehe he did however invite me over to spend the night and share his bed in davis last night! I was like your'e comfortable with doing that with me allready? And he said he was as long as I was lol! Ofcourse I was but I just didn't have the gas to make it that far, so I couldn't go :(. Anyhow. My cousin and I went to Lyons to have a late night meal. We were very loud and obnoxious just drowning ourselves in each others good company! It was a good time. Lol I kept saying how badly I want to sleep with Jeremy whose one of our Co-workers! God he's really cute, he's 6'5 wear size 15 shoes and seems to be flirting with me all the time! Lol but so far I've been so good at keeping things friendly. Sometimes I don't know what to do with myself though! Lol. Today was a good day too. I went to my first district buddhist meeting as the new young mens division leader and had a great time with all of my family in faith! I felt really loved and I elevated my consciousness again! It was amazing! After that I went home and talked to gregorio for an hour, then I went back to lashonda's to eat some red snapper and hang out with her and her children! Good times galore! She's going through a depression that's being clinically treated. I feel very much like someone who can aid her in her struggle after having experienced sever and chronic depression for over half my life. After that I came home, tried to call gregorio twice but got no answer. I'm guessing he's sleeping or busy with work. But I'll talk to him tomorrow. Geez I really like him so far! Which is probably one reason why I haven't sought out sex since talking with him! Lol. Anyhow, I came home did laundry and cleaned for my grandmother. Now I'm going to probably clean my room a bit and get my clothes ready for work and for Bill snyder's funeral in the morning :( he's the second elderly neighbor to die within the past two months, and I'm deeply affected. He and Mrs. Nelson were two of the people who made my Street the homely domicile that it's been since before my birth. The absence of these two has left a kinda hollow pit in a part of my life. I miss seeing mrs. Nelson outside over-watering the lawn and trying to get me to buy cat food for the cat Tiberious that I gave her, who she renamed Tom because it was easier to remember. And I Saw these two car's parked outside our neighborhood today talking and blasting loud music for a host of young highschool students who had gathered around. I miss Bill coming out and yelling at them and calling the police. *sighs* time's are changing, we are all changing as well. Entering the world of adulthood where reality as we knew it while wrapped in the illusion of youthful splenor, no longer pervails. Anyhow I'm kinda sad no lol. Look what I did to myself! I'm going to prepare to tomorrows day of beauty and excellence! Goodnight!