FanFic: In Greyscale
Title: In Greyscale
Summary: The Marauders and Lily trudge through Year Seven at Hogwarts, besieged and beleaguered by a war that cannot be held at bay for much longer. Somewhere along the way, they all realize the world isn't split into black and white.
Category: Lily and James: General/Romance, MWPP antics and the first wizarding war
Rating: T/PG-13, potentially R
Warnings: Language, potential sexual situations in the future, innuendo
Word Count: 8080 and counting
Lily stalked through the barrier to Platform Nine and Three Quarters in high dudgeon, her eyes sparking dangerously as she muttered furiously under her breath, "I'll give her freak, stupid emaciated little twig gallivanting off with an absolute whale of a mustached moron, going on and on about how perfect her boring little tea party world is. Should have just turned dear old Vernon into a pig, then we'd see who's the loser."
Hacked off at her older sister as she was, Lily didn't quite take in her surroundings at first, which was a pity, she supposed, because it was her last time going to school after all. She breathed in the rather sooty air of the platform, reveling in the cacophony, and calmed down at last. She was going home.
Still, Lily couldn't help but notice that the platform wasn't as boisterous as usual; people were keeping more to themselves, it seemed, and she wondered if it were just her or if there really were fewer students milling about than usual. It made her feel slightly uneasy, what with all the nasty disappearances plastered across the Daily Prophet getting all the more frequent and the ominous threat of a rising of dark wizards lurking everywhere these days, Lily wasn't sure her last year would be as idyllic as she would have liked it to be.
Lily set off smartly towards the train nevertheless, wanting to reach the Prefects compartment before the others got there. Hopefully the Head Boy would get there early as well so that they could plan out what they were going to say to the Prefects. She ran through the possible candidates in her head again, it wasn't Remus, unfortunately, he'd replied in the negative to her owl over the summer, so it had to be Davies, Bones or god forbid, Avery, the Slytherin prefect. With some trepidation, she slid open the door to the compartment, only to see a rather unwelcome someone already inside.
"Potter," Lily said, tersely, narrowing her eyes at him, "What are you doing here?" While Potter was definitely not her least favorite person in all of Hogwarts anymore, she was still highly suspicious of his presence, and for good reason. For all of fifth and most of sixth year, he'd asked her out incessantly, with the arrogant, spoiled rich boy air of someone who's always gotten what they want. It was true that he'd stopped hexing people for the heck of it sometime after Christmas break last year, and he'd gotten less obnoxious around her, but he and his friends were constantly up to some silly and often hurtful prank that would wreak havoc in the school corridors, making more work for the prefects. They'd stopped having their colorful and highly volatile public shouting matches a while back, but they weren't exactly on first-name terms, and Lily had never really seen reason to change that status.
James looked up at Lily, before quickly looking away again. She was as beautiful as ever, with her deep red hair and striking green eyes. It still made his heart ache a little bit that she wouldn't give him the time of day, but recent events had thrown that particular problem into perspective. The whole saga of doing everything to impress her and making a fool of himself in the process seemed like it belonged to another lifetime. He reached into his pocket and held out his Head Boy badge to her, silently, waiting to see her reaction.
"What's this?" Lily snapped, taking a look at what he was holding out, her insides twisting a bit already-it couldn't be, it just couldn't be-her eyes popping out when she recognized a badge very similar to the one pinned to her own robes. She scoffed then, and said, "Who did you take that from, Potter? Don't make me take points from my own house, before term even starts. I don't have time for your nonsense this year, it's NEWT year and I need those grades, unlike you. Don't spoil it for me."
"I wasn't planning on doing anything of the sort," James said, sighing, "Dumbledore really did make me Head Boy. Got it with my letter and everything. Barking mad, but there you have it."
Lily opened and closed her mouth a few times, looking rather like a goldfish, albeit a very beautiful one in James's eyes. Inside, she felt her twisting insides settle and turn into lead. She had worked for this position, worked so hard, been a model student with perfect grades and not a single skived class or after-hours adventure, and there he sat, prankster and bully extraordinaire, with an entire fortune to his name and over a hundred detentions to boot, hardly ever doing any schoolwork, spending all his time on his bloody broomstick or attached at the hip to Sirius Black. What did he know about hard work? What did he, a pureblood, know how hard it was to prove one's self at Hogwarts, to negate all the snide remarks about her muggleborn origin and consequent lack of talent? What did he know about responsibility and duty, and oh Merlin, anything at all? Head Boy?
And suddenly, Lily couldn't hold it all in any longer. She'd never been one to mince words after all. "Who the hell do you think you are, Potter, lounging there like you own this bloody place? Oh I forgot, you probably do own it, don't you? What did your parents do, bribe and blackmail Dumbledore till he gave you the badge, all so you could lord about more than you usually do? Mummy couldn't stand the idea of her son being second best to poor, kind-hearted Remus? Do you exist to ruin my life and everything that's important to me?" she shrieked, well aware that she was being slightly harsh, and yet unable to stop herself.
James had flinched at the mention of his parents, and screwed up his face in anguish before hot, seething anger took the place of the grief that weighed him down constantly. He drew himself to his full height, before replying in a low voice that shook all the same, "My parents couldn't have bought me this badge, you see, Evans, because they happen to be dead. Mummy won't ever see me as Head Boy because she's six feet under. I don't want this badge any more than you want me to have it, but I reckoned if Dumbledore asked me to be Head Boy, he'd have had his reasons, and I'd do my best to live up to it. But if me being Head Boy shatters your perfect little world, Evans, I'd be glad to hand this damn thing in. In fact, here, you can do it for me." At that, James thrust his badge into Lily's hands and strode out the door, brushing past Remus and the other prefects crowding near the compartment door.
Trying desperately to ward off the overwhelming misery, James nearly jogged to the Marauders' usual compartment near the back of the train. Only Peter was inside, he noted, with relief. Sirius must have been off to get his customary welcome-back snog from one of his numerous female admirers. Barely muttering a greeting to Peter, James reached for a vial of potion in his trunk.
"What are you doing?" Peter asked nervously, knowing full well he couldn't stop James from doing exactly as he liked, "You're not taking that Dreamless Sleep potion again, are you? You know Moony…"
"Do me a favor and lay off, Wormtail, I don't need you three harping at me all the time. And don't tell the others," James snapped, irate. He downed the potion in one gulp and lay down on the seat, his mother's dead eyes staring back at him for a moment until sleep overcame him.
Back in the Prefects' compartment, Lily sank into her seat, stunned by James's reply. She had never imagined she was hitting so beneath the belt with her little diatribe, and her insides were roiling again, this time with guilt, as she clutched the HB badge in her hand. She was shaken out of her trance as the prefects filed in, looking expectantly at her. Suddenly very nervous, she started her carefully prepared speech.
At the end of the meeting, Lily walked up to Remus, who for once didn't look his usual amicable self. Red-faced, Lily tried to explain to him that she hadn't known, how could she have known, after all, when he interrupted, rather sharply.
"Don't you think you were far too harsh on him regardless, Lily?" Remus asked, raising his eyebrow.
Lily stared at the floor, thoroughly ashamed of herself-she was always kind to everyone, everyone that is, except Potter and Black, and she would never have said anything so hurtful had it not been Potter. She looked despairingly at Remus and said, in a small voice, "What do I do now?"
Remus's face softened slightly, though he was still frowning. "Well, you apologize, of course. I just hope he's ready to hear it. See you around, Lily," he said, and he was off.
Lily trailed off to find her own friends, trying to figure out what she could possibly say to apologize adequately to Potter, without being completely dishonest.
When Peter shook James awake as the train pulled into Hogsmeade, something fell to the ground with a familiar clatter. Reaching blearily for his glasses, James looked darkly at the Head Boy badge and the piece of parchment tucked under it, which read
I'm terribly sorry. Please don't turn in the badge. -L.E.
Summary: The Marauders and Lily trudge through Year Seven at Hogwarts, besieged and beleaguered by a war that cannot be held at bay for much longer. Somewhere along the way, they all realize the world isn't split into black and white.
Category: Lily and James: General/Romance, MWPP antics and the first wizarding war
Rating: T/PG-13, potentially R
Warnings: Language, potential sexual situations in the future, innuendo
Word Count: 8080 and counting
Lily stalked through the barrier to Platform Nine and Three Quarters in high dudgeon, her eyes sparking dangerously as she muttered furiously under her breath, "I'll give her freak, stupid emaciated little twig gallivanting off with an absolute whale of a mustached moron, going on and on about how perfect her boring little tea party world is. Should have just turned dear old Vernon into a pig, then we'd see who's the loser."
Hacked off at her older sister as she was, Lily didn't quite take in her surroundings at first, which was a pity, she supposed, because it was her last time going to school after all. She breathed in the rather sooty air of the platform, reveling in the cacophony, and calmed down at last. She was going home.
Still, Lily couldn't help but notice that the platform wasn't as boisterous as usual; people were keeping more to themselves, it seemed, and she wondered if it were just her or if there really were fewer students milling about than usual. It made her feel slightly uneasy, what with all the nasty disappearances plastered across the Daily Prophet getting all the more frequent and the ominous threat of a rising of dark wizards lurking everywhere these days, Lily wasn't sure her last year would be as idyllic as she would have liked it to be.
Lily set off smartly towards the train nevertheless, wanting to reach the Prefects compartment before the others got there. Hopefully the Head Boy would get there early as well so that they could plan out what they were going to say to the Prefects. She ran through the possible candidates in her head again, it wasn't Remus, unfortunately, he'd replied in the negative to her owl over the summer, so it had to be Davies, Bones or god forbid, Avery, the Slytherin prefect. With some trepidation, she slid open the door to the compartment, only to see a rather unwelcome someone already inside.
"Potter," Lily said, tersely, narrowing her eyes at him, "What are you doing here?" While Potter was definitely not her least favorite person in all of Hogwarts anymore, she was still highly suspicious of his presence, and for good reason. For all of fifth and most of sixth year, he'd asked her out incessantly, with the arrogant, spoiled rich boy air of someone who's always gotten what they want. It was true that he'd stopped hexing people for the heck of it sometime after Christmas break last year, and he'd gotten less obnoxious around her, but he and his friends were constantly up to some silly and often hurtful prank that would wreak havoc in the school corridors, making more work for the prefects. They'd stopped having their colorful and highly volatile public shouting matches a while back, but they weren't exactly on first-name terms, and Lily had never really seen reason to change that status.
James looked up at Lily, before quickly looking away again. She was as beautiful as ever, with her deep red hair and striking green eyes. It still made his heart ache a little bit that she wouldn't give him the time of day, but recent events had thrown that particular problem into perspective. The whole saga of doing everything to impress her and making a fool of himself in the process seemed like it belonged to another lifetime. He reached into his pocket and held out his Head Boy badge to her, silently, waiting to see her reaction.
"What's this?" Lily snapped, taking a look at what he was holding out, her insides twisting a bit already-it couldn't be, it just couldn't be-her eyes popping out when she recognized a badge very similar to the one pinned to her own robes. She scoffed then, and said, "Who did you take that from, Potter? Don't make me take points from my own house, before term even starts. I don't have time for your nonsense this year, it's NEWT year and I need those grades, unlike you. Don't spoil it for me."
"I wasn't planning on doing anything of the sort," James said, sighing, "Dumbledore really did make me Head Boy. Got it with my letter and everything. Barking mad, but there you have it."
Lily opened and closed her mouth a few times, looking rather like a goldfish, albeit a very beautiful one in James's eyes. Inside, she felt her twisting insides settle and turn into lead. She had worked for this position, worked so hard, been a model student with perfect grades and not a single skived class or after-hours adventure, and there he sat, prankster and bully extraordinaire, with an entire fortune to his name and over a hundred detentions to boot, hardly ever doing any schoolwork, spending all his time on his bloody broomstick or attached at the hip to Sirius Black. What did he know about hard work? What did he, a pureblood, know how hard it was to prove one's self at Hogwarts, to negate all the snide remarks about her muggleborn origin and consequent lack of talent? What did he know about responsibility and duty, and oh Merlin, anything at all? Head Boy?
And suddenly, Lily couldn't hold it all in any longer. She'd never been one to mince words after all. "Who the hell do you think you are, Potter, lounging there like you own this bloody place? Oh I forgot, you probably do own it, don't you? What did your parents do, bribe and blackmail Dumbledore till he gave you the badge, all so you could lord about more than you usually do? Mummy couldn't stand the idea of her son being second best to poor, kind-hearted Remus? Do you exist to ruin my life and everything that's important to me?" she shrieked, well aware that she was being slightly harsh, and yet unable to stop herself.
James had flinched at the mention of his parents, and screwed up his face in anguish before hot, seething anger took the place of the grief that weighed him down constantly. He drew himself to his full height, before replying in a low voice that shook all the same, "My parents couldn't have bought me this badge, you see, Evans, because they happen to be dead. Mummy won't ever see me as Head Boy because she's six feet under. I don't want this badge any more than you want me to have it, but I reckoned if Dumbledore asked me to be Head Boy, he'd have had his reasons, and I'd do my best to live up to it. But if me being Head Boy shatters your perfect little world, Evans, I'd be glad to hand this damn thing in. In fact, here, you can do it for me." At that, James thrust his badge into Lily's hands and strode out the door, brushing past Remus and the other prefects crowding near the compartment door.
Trying desperately to ward off the overwhelming misery, James nearly jogged to the Marauders' usual compartment near the back of the train. Only Peter was inside, he noted, with relief. Sirius must have been off to get his customary welcome-back snog from one of his numerous female admirers. Barely muttering a greeting to Peter, James reached for a vial of potion in his trunk.
"What are you doing?" Peter asked nervously, knowing full well he couldn't stop James from doing exactly as he liked, "You're not taking that Dreamless Sleep potion again, are you? You know Moony…"
"Do me a favor and lay off, Wormtail, I don't need you three harping at me all the time. And don't tell the others," James snapped, irate. He downed the potion in one gulp and lay down on the seat, his mother's dead eyes staring back at him for a moment until sleep overcame him.
Back in the Prefects' compartment, Lily sank into her seat, stunned by James's reply. She had never imagined she was hitting so beneath the belt with her little diatribe, and her insides were roiling again, this time with guilt, as she clutched the HB badge in her hand. She was shaken out of her trance as the prefects filed in, looking expectantly at her. Suddenly very nervous, she started her carefully prepared speech.
At the end of the meeting, Lily walked up to Remus, who for once didn't look his usual amicable self. Red-faced, Lily tried to explain to him that she hadn't known, how could she have known, after all, when he interrupted, rather sharply.
"Don't you think you were far too harsh on him regardless, Lily?" Remus asked, raising his eyebrow.
Lily stared at the floor, thoroughly ashamed of herself-she was always kind to everyone, everyone that is, except Potter and Black, and she would never have said anything so hurtful had it not been Potter. She looked despairingly at Remus and said, in a small voice, "What do I do now?"
Remus's face softened slightly, though he was still frowning. "Well, you apologize, of course. I just hope he's ready to hear it. See you around, Lily," he said, and he was off.
Lily trailed off to find her own friends, trying to figure out what she could possibly say to apologize adequately to Potter, without being completely dishonest.
When Peter shook James awake as the train pulled into Hogsmeade, something fell to the ground with a familiar clatter. Reaching blearily for his glasses, James looked darkly at the Head Boy badge and the piece of parchment tucked under it, which read
I'm terribly sorry. Please don't turn in the badge. -L.E.