baby steps
Baby steps seem to be the story of my life these days. Everything I do seems to move in baby steps.
My fencing is inching along at a snails pace, but it is moving forward. Where I am now is miles ahead of where I was a two years ago....even one year ago. I'm finally moving my feet. The steps aren't pretty or precise, but there's movement. And I'm learning to be aggressive.
Not sure if I should be happy that it's taking me a long time to "get" it or depressed.
On one hand, the people who get it really quick receive accolades and are the topic of conversation. A mixed blessing in my opinion. I appreciate when people notice if I've improved. But awards mean being in front of people and that kind of sucks.
But are people who pick it up quickly really learning to "fence" or are they relying on athleticism that will fade eventually? M has won countless tournaments. But he's only now starting to develop finesse and actual fencing skills. S relies on her speed and her willingness to be aggressive.
I, on the other hand, struggle with every concept. None of it comes easy. Half of the time I feel like I'm beating my head against a brick wall and the other half of the time I feel like I should give up. Fortunately (or unfortunately depending on how you look at things), I'm pigheaded. I'd say I am determined and I persevere against all odds, but the truth is..... I'm pigheaded. I'm a lousy fencer, but I'm damn pigheaded.
Which leads me to the whole MIT concept. B suggested it (although I think that may have been him being perverse). R thought it might be a good idea and worked to reassure me that I wouldn't be tossed into anything without a safety net (but he likes to flirt with me and you don't tell a person you flirt with that they'd be an utter failure at something -- it's not the gentlemanly thing to do). P seemed hesitant. Seemed like his was the only sane reaction.
Playing devil's advocate...say I became an MIT. I'd need a sponsor apparently. Don't want G. I'd end up hitting him over the head with something. I could work with P, but we've been friends for so long that it just doesn't seem like a good idea. M.... wouldn't work. He and I are polar opposites in our abilities. I get along well with J. And S would be good, but he doesn't get to attend practice all that much these days.
And do I want a sponsor who has a similar mindset or someone who is going to challenge me? And what about the whole teaching thing? Ideally, an MIT may be just part of the safety system, but in reality, they end up teaching beginners the basics of fencing. Good god! A whole bunch of fencers who learned from me. I could bring the Aethelmearc fencing community to its knees all by myself!!!
And how did this all come about? Because I was concerned about things I saw during a tournament?
Maybe next time I should just close my eyes when I'm not in the list.
My fencing is inching along at a snails pace, but it is moving forward. Where I am now is miles ahead of where I was a two years ago....even one year ago. I'm finally moving my feet. The steps aren't pretty or precise, but there's movement. And I'm learning to be aggressive.
Not sure if I should be happy that it's taking me a long time to "get" it or depressed.
On one hand, the people who get it really quick receive accolades and are the topic of conversation. A mixed blessing in my opinion. I appreciate when people notice if I've improved. But awards mean being in front of people and that kind of sucks.
But are people who pick it up quickly really learning to "fence" or are they relying on athleticism that will fade eventually? M has won countless tournaments. But he's only now starting to develop finesse and actual fencing skills. S relies on her speed and her willingness to be aggressive.
I, on the other hand, struggle with every concept. None of it comes easy. Half of the time I feel like I'm beating my head against a brick wall and the other half of the time I feel like I should give up. Fortunately (or unfortunately depending on how you look at things), I'm pigheaded. I'd say I am determined and I persevere against all odds, but the truth is..... I'm pigheaded. I'm a lousy fencer, but I'm damn pigheaded.
Which leads me to the whole MIT concept. B suggested it (although I think that may have been him being perverse). R thought it might be a good idea and worked to reassure me that I wouldn't be tossed into anything without a safety net (but he likes to flirt with me and you don't tell a person you flirt with that they'd be an utter failure at something -- it's not the gentlemanly thing to do). P seemed hesitant. Seemed like his was the only sane reaction.
Playing devil's advocate...say I became an MIT. I'd need a sponsor apparently. Don't want G. I'd end up hitting him over the head with something. I could work with P, but we've been friends for so long that it just doesn't seem like a good idea. M.... wouldn't work. He and I are polar opposites in our abilities. I get along well with J. And S would be good, but he doesn't get to attend practice all that much these days.
And do I want a sponsor who has a similar mindset or someone who is going to challenge me? And what about the whole teaching thing? Ideally, an MIT may be just part of the safety system, but in reality, they end up teaching beginners the basics of fencing. Good god! A whole bunch of fencers who learned from me. I could bring the Aethelmearc fencing community to its knees all by myself!!!
And how did this all come about? Because I was concerned about things I saw during a tournament?
Maybe next time I should just close my eyes when I'm not in the list.