(no subject)
What is it about change that makes it so overpowering? Is it needing to make choices that can affect your entire life? Is it fear of regret? Maybe that's just me and my personal hang-ups.
Many things are different these days. Paul has taken on work with his brother in carpentry. I have been working in the local school district as a Teacher's Assistant. I can honestly say that these two major changes have led to more personal fulfillment for both of us, respectively. I know I'm in an environment that I enjoy and find rewarding. I feel good at the end of the day. And yet, I feel so.. I can't even describe it accurately. It's not depressed. It's more like I feel lonely, maybe? I find myself dwelling on things I shouldn't. I feel emotionally hung-up on things I can never remedy. Dunno.
On to more tangible and pleasant things- Talin graduated 2nd grade today! He is changing too, but in a very grand way. Although he has always had a robust personality, his "mature" personality is beginning to take shape. His morals, his personal responsibility and motivation are all showing through. He's really beautiful, and I can see what a great young man he will become.
We had the funniest moment the other day. He watches TV when he earns it, and has apparently been paying lots of attention to the commercials. I woke up a couple of weeks ago and he says, "Good morning, Mom! Do I have a matress with springs in it?" 1/2 awake, I say yes, we both do. He shakes his head in disapproval. "Well, that is NOT good for my back. Did you know that we can buy this matress that will support our backs? And if I put a glass of juice on the matress and jumped up and down REAL hard, the glass won't even spill? We need to get one of those." I was in tears laughing, explaining to him that he has the comfiest bed I've ever slept on, and that people who are trying to sell you something will tell you just about anything if you'll fork out money for it. He cracks me up.
Did I mention he is 7 1/2 now? The best part about being in the school district is that I get to be available to him as a resource for studying and homework. This past year he has really excelled, and I'd like to think it's because of all of my involvement from home by encouraging him to challenge himself. He is also a Bear now in Cub Scouts. They earn all of these beltloops and arrow heads for accomplishments. He earned the most arrow heads out of our whole den! They are earned by doing MORE than the requirements, and we did over 40 additional activities.
The garden is looking awesome this year. I started EVERYTHING from seed, and have had so many successful seedlings that I gave away a ton to teachers and neighbors. Talin also started his own little garden of sunflowers, which are already 1/2 his height. I'll try and post some pictures.
I guess that's all for now. I need to shake this feeling- it's getting in the way of me really being content. Until later, then.
Note: This song makes me feel terrible. How is that possible?
Many things are different these days. Paul has taken on work with his brother in carpentry. I have been working in the local school district as a Teacher's Assistant. I can honestly say that these two major changes have led to more personal fulfillment for both of us, respectively. I know I'm in an environment that I enjoy and find rewarding. I feel good at the end of the day. And yet, I feel so.. I can't even describe it accurately. It's not depressed. It's more like I feel lonely, maybe? I find myself dwelling on things I shouldn't. I feel emotionally hung-up on things I can never remedy. Dunno.
On to more tangible and pleasant things- Talin graduated 2nd grade today! He is changing too, but in a very grand way. Although he has always had a robust personality, his "mature" personality is beginning to take shape. His morals, his personal responsibility and motivation are all showing through. He's really beautiful, and I can see what a great young man he will become.
We had the funniest moment the other day. He watches TV when he earns it, and has apparently been paying lots of attention to the commercials. I woke up a couple of weeks ago and he says, "Good morning, Mom! Do I have a matress with springs in it?" 1/2 awake, I say yes, we both do. He shakes his head in disapproval. "Well, that is NOT good for my back. Did you know that we can buy this matress that will support our backs? And if I put a glass of juice on the matress and jumped up and down REAL hard, the glass won't even spill? We need to get one of those." I was in tears laughing, explaining to him that he has the comfiest bed I've ever slept on, and that people who are trying to sell you something will tell you just about anything if you'll fork out money for it. He cracks me up.
Did I mention he is 7 1/2 now? The best part about being in the school district is that I get to be available to him as a resource for studying and homework. This past year he has really excelled, and I'd like to think it's because of all of my involvement from home by encouraging him to challenge himself. He is also a Bear now in Cub Scouts. They earn all of these beltloops and arrow heads for accomplishments. He earned the most arrow heads out of our whole den! They are earned by doing MORE than the requirements, and we did over 40 additional activities.
The garden is looking awesome this year. I started EVERYTHING from seed, and have had so many successful seedlings that I gave away a ton to teachers and neighbors. Talin also started his own little garden of sunflowers, which are already 1/2 his height. I'll try and post some pictures.
I guess that's all for now. I need to shake this feeling- it's getting in the way of me really being content. Until later, then.
Note: This song makes me feel terrible. How is that possible?