(no subject)
Mariela.... Mariela..... Mariela...... What can I even say here.
I love you!
but is it really that simple, I wish I knew what motivates me to keep this, us, alive.
I need answers to questions that I don't have. Complacency bothers me.
I never just leave well enough alone. Self-destruction is an art form I've mastered in only so little time!
"A wedge of cake from the fair, The first cut in a fresh piece of construction paper!"
I want to feel completly consumed by you... I want to feel like I'm dying when I'm apart from you, Mariela I want it to hurt so badly when I sleep alone that I wake up crying and begging for you! I want my passion and love for you to be so deep I sweat when I think about your name. I want to stand next to you and feel dizzy because I'm nervous about touching you. When you hurt my feelings instead of getting angry I want to cry because I feel helpless. When you hold my hand I want it to feel like I'm holding my first highschool girlfriends hand. I want.... I want..... I want...... I want to feel like I can't breathe when I lay awake at night thinking about you. It all sounds so painful but to me it will feel so good!
I want to get lost in day dreams of you and me, much like I used to do in my free time at work or in school. I want to miss you so much even when you've only been gone for five minutes.
Mariela who needs independence when I have you!
I love you!
but is it really that simple, I wish I knew what motivates me to keep this, us, alive.
I need answers to questions that I don't have. Complacency bothers me.
I never just leave well enough alone. Self-destruction is an art form I've mastered in only so little time!
"A wedge of cake from the fair, The first cut in a fresh piece of construction paper!"
I want to feel completly consumed by you... I want to feel like I'm dying when I'm apart from you, Mariela I want it to hurt so badly when I sleep alone that I wake up crying and begging for you! I want my passion and love for you to be so deep I sweat when I think about your name. I want to stand next to you and feel dizzy because I'm nervous about touching you. When you hurt my feelings instead of getting angry I want to cry because I feel helpless. When you hold my hand I want it to feel like I'm holding my first highschool girlfriends hand. I want.... I want..... I want...... I want to feel like I can't breathe when I lay awake at night thinking about you. It all sounds so painful but to me it will feel so good!
I want to get lost in day dreams of you and me, much like I used to do in my free time at work or in school. I want to miss you so much even when you've only been gone for five minutes.
Mariela who needs independence when I have you!