go on and lose it...
my birthday was ok.
friends made it better.
it's weird i went through this whole "omg, i'm 23, i'm so old" thing.
and i still kinda feel like it...but there's nothing i can do about it so i just gotta be ok with it.
this year is the last year i'll do two nights of partying.
way too messed up the night before my birthday and then i was too sick to enjoy my actual birthday day.
friends who pretend they're your friends suck.
why would you leave someone totally wasted to go make out with a guy?
ugh awful.
and why did i even say happy birthday to him?
and he couldn't have the courtesy to text me or anything.
it's only 2 days after, there's no way he could forget.
and he's known it was that day for like almost 4 years.
bastard.
and then that other one.
ugh he makes me mad.
but i'll still go to rocket summer with him for freeeeee.
and you.
i'm trying. i really am.
i send you IMs all the time.
i'm sorry i didn't answer at midnight.
i had to open, i know lame excuse according to you, but i was tired.
and sleeping.
and didn't hear it.
and i think you shouldn't drive drunk anymore.
it's an awful thing to do.
ps. i still wanna be your friend :/
i think i'm starting a new life.
from now on if i drink (which won't be very often) only light beer...and maybe an occasional shot if someone buys it for me
[cuzithinkit'sincrediblyrudetoturndownashotsomeoneboughtforyou]
and i'm gonna eat better.
and excercise. [running and yoga]
and try to be happier.
and by january i will start a new career (or a real one anyways)
and move to LA. and be a real grown-up in a job i love.
23 is too old to act as young as i do.
if that makes sense.
good thing about tomorrow?
kanye and 50.
i think kanye already won.
ps.
let's not forget ourselves,
good friends,
i am flawed if i'm not free.
and your husband will never leave you,
yeah he will never leave you.
for me.