almost another month later...
hopefully when im back at school ill get better at writing in this thing more often...but for now those few people who may read my journal will have to deal with the fact that i suck at updating! :) so recent developments...erik and i broke up, after 6 months, and it was cool while it lasted, and was lots of fun, but i just dont think it was gonna continue to work...and i feel really bad cuz erik is soo upset, and that makes me sad cuz of course i still care about him, and i cant fix it...i have to watch him hurt...and then i dont feel as bad as he does, i can just tell, and then that makes me feel even worse cuz i feel bad for not feeling bad enough, a rather strange experience...but i think all of this had to happen, and i think well both be better off in the end...im just glad i didnt lose anything huge with this break up, i still have a friend, a great one i might add :)...in other news, im up right now at almost 5 am cuz im a nutcase and i decided to play silent hill 3 all day and then see freddy vs jason late at night, and there are thunder storms shaking my walls and lighting up my room, and so now i really cant sleep, im waiting for sunrise, and hoping that when it comes ill be able to close my eyes and keep them closed until about 1045 when i have to get up and start gettin ready for work...this will be like the 3rd night in a row where ive slept about 6 hours, pretty crappy, but im surviving...i was up till 5 am last night too, but thats cuz i was out and about with sean, which was really exciting since i have only hung with him like one other time this summer, which is sad considering we saw each other like 5 or 6 times a week last summer! and this summer we hardly even have been talking, it makes me insane! i dunno what the deal is with that...and now we hang out and im leaving for school in a month! sheesh! anyways, i guess thats about all i have to say, and im afraid if i say anymore it will look very strange because im tireddd, oh so tiredddd...