The world's oldest solitary profession

[ludickid]

Hey, Yahoo! has just posted its Top Searches of 2005. Let's take a look, and see what the average internet user enjoys!

TOP YAHOO! SEARCHES (AND WHAT THEY MEAN)

1. Britney Spears (masturbation)
2. 50 Cent (white people wanting to be black)
3. Cartoon Network (getting high)
4. Mariah Carey (masturbation)
5. Green Day (angst)
6. Jessica Simpson (masturbation)
7. Paris Hilton (masturbation)
8. Eminem (angst)
9. Ciara (masturbation)
10. Lindsay Lohan (masturbation)

TOP YAHOO! IMAGE SEARCHES

1. Jessica Simpson (masturbation)
2. Paris Hilton (masturbation)
3. Britney Spears (masturbation)
4. Lindsay Lohan (masturbation)
5. Angelina Jolie (masturbation)
6. Pamela Anderson (masturbation)
7. Jennifer Lopez (masturbation)
8. Hilary Diff (masturbation)
9. Carmen Electra (masturbation)
10. Anime (masturbation)

TOP YAHOO! VIDEO SEARCHES

1. Britney Spears (masturbation; childbirthing tips)
2. Anime (masturbation)
3. Funny videos (universal enjoyment of watching people get peed on)
4. Jessica Simpson (masturbation)
5. 50 Cent (people looking for an easy Halloween costume)
6. Jennifer Lopez (masturbation)
7. Shakira (masturbation)
8. Mariah Carey (masturbation; psychiatric training)
9. Eminem (angst)
10. Lindsay Lohan (masturbation)

TOP YAHOO! PRODUCT SEARCHES

1. Digital cameras (masturbation)
2. Flowers (fornication)
3. iPod (intellectual masturbation)
4. Nike (brand loyalty)
5. Prom dresses (fornication)
6. PSP (masturbation)
7. XBox 360 (masturbation training)
8. Halloween costumes (50 Cent)
9. Shoes (masturbation)
10. Roses (fornication)

TOP YAHOO! NEWS SEARCHES

1. Tsunami (schadenfreude)
2. Iraq (schadenfreude)
3. Michael Jackson (racism)
4. Natalee Holloway (masturbation)
5. Afghanistan (schadenfreude)
6. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie (masturbation)
7. Hurricane Katrina (racism)
8. Cindy Sheehan (schadenfreude)
9. President Bush (monkey studies)
10. Tom Cruise (masturbation/schadenfreude)