(no subject)

[lucylia]

I didn't see Ash yesterday, he was off sick from work and I really miss him. Its weird, I've been texting him and stuff but somehow it doesn't seem real. Its like he's just a thing sending me text messages, could be anything but I miss him so much, I just can't explain. Without him I feel like I'm not a real person, I'm just here but not really inside my body, its like i'm dissociating but without the SI. I guess its cuz theres noone to tell me that I am real. Its not like I have any friends or anyone to act as though they care about me and I'm just sitting in the corner of a computer room at school typing away on this thing. I might not be a real person, who knows, who is ther to say that I didn't die last night and woke up dead, carrying on like normal, but really I'm not here, I'm nothing but a ghost, carrying on liek I'm dead. Isn't that from a film or book or something??!! Maybe I'm dead and I just don't know it!

Maybe write more later on, maybe not, I'm in a weird, not myself mood at the moment.

Lu