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[luckytj24]

went gambling for my first time last night at Grand Casino, in hinckely. bob's brother zac is home from iraq with a shit load of money and gave me and bob $40 and we won $110. pretty sweet first-timers luck!!!! we ate snow crab and got sticky. it was soo much fun. then , getting home at 11:30pm we went to play pool, so zac could use his newly

Comments

[_so_this_is_luv]

Thats not true and you know it. Your mom said she would find you a place. and im sure that she wont have one by friday. and i know you dont want to go home. But im sure you could find something temporary untill you can get a place to live. not having anywhere to go is no excuse. Because this is your chance not only to get out, but to help bob get his life together. this is a once in a lifetime chance that you probably will never get again. If you have to go home for a week or two. maybe it would do you some good to relax for a while and not have to worry about rent and everything. it would give you a break from the world. It seems to me like you think everyone will think that you failed if you have to go back home. like you didnt make it in the real world. But you have done better then anyone i know because of everything that you have had to sacrafice for anthoer person. I can honestly say i take pride in saying that i am your friend and if you go home i think i might burst with pride. This will probably be one of the hardest decisions that you will ever have to make. and i dont want you to give everything that is being offered to you up because you dont have a place. Ill let you stay at my house untill you find a place. i just really think this is the best thing for you, bob, and your relationship together.

i love you and i wish i could explain this all better. maybe we should get together and talk. give me a call and we'll make plans.

sry this is so long.

[luckytj24]

i've made the decision i want to move out, but i don't know how to even bring it up to him, because i gave him until friday.... i notice i keep needing this constant change for things. he did say if it came down to it, he would move back to his mom's trailer in gary....(oh so far away). and yes i know i need the help, but the conditions that come with it are too harsh. like i know i can stay at my mom's friends house, but bob would never be allowed over. i don't want to be "protected from him" that's not what i need. i just need the strength to make it clear to him what needs to change.
but think about it honestly, your parents would never let it fly me staying there....
i don't want to go home not only because i think people will think i've failed but, because all my life i hated living with my parents and the shit they dig up to fight about. when i don't live with them, i can walk away, set my own rules.
the only thing i know for sure there's a place opening up in june on 21st ave, but i DO not and cannot live with my parents for even that long. my schedule's too busy to live there too. i don't know, these aren't more excuses, because i do want to live on my own, but it's the telling why part and THEN the fact that once i tell him, i have to spend that time over my birthday moving.......