I don't understand something? Surprise!
All right. What is with the phrase "nice guys finish last?"
I've had a couple of people explain this to me, but I still don't get what they're trying to say. From what I hear, this phrase seems to be very relevant to modern society. I'm not even sure how.
Isn't "niceness" immediately a positive quality? No one goes around saying, "Oh gosh, I hope my boss / significant other / parents / friends are absolute bitches to me today. That would really validate my worth as a person." It might be kind of refreshing to see bitter or cynical people, but that doesn't sound like the same situation. Is this phrase saying that most people actually do need people to be rude and angry with them?
Or maybe they're afraid that their inherent "niceness" will cloud his or her honesty. But lying has nothing to do with being nice! Lying is the conveying of mistruth: You can do that in any number of ways (most of them not very "nice.") So that can't be it.
Some told me that "nice" is okay, but being a "pushover" is not okay. What is this "pushover?" Is this a person that can't make their own decisions? That sounds like a lazy person to me. Maybe it's someone with intellectual dishonesty. If that's the case, I don't see how they could be "nice" by default.
The only conclusion that makes sense is that the "nice guy" is an archetype -- a broad symbol for something unattainable. The people I see mostly using the phrase are ones that make bad relationship decisions and tend to make up excuses for those decisions.
Either that, or being a total wanker is somehow appealing to our sense of primal sexuality. That sounds wrong.
I've had a couple of people explain this to me, but I still don't get what they're trying to say. From what I hear, this phrase seems to be very relevant to modern society. I'm not even sure how.
Isn't "niceness" immediately a positive quality? No one goes around saying, "Oh gosh, I hope my boss / significant other / parents / friends are absolute bitches to me today. That would really validate my worth as a person." It might be kind of refreshing to see bitter or cynical people, but that doesn't sound like the same situation. Is this phrase saying that most people actually do need people to be rude and angry with them?
Or maybe they're afraid that their inherent "niceness" will cloud his or her honesty. But lying has nothing to do with being nice! Lying is the conveying of mistruth: You can do that in any number of ways (most of them not very "nice.") So that can't be it.
Some told me that "nice" is okay, but being a "pushover" is not okay. What is this "pushover?" Is this a person that can't make their own decisions? That sounds like a lazy person to me. Maybe it's someone with intellectual dishonesty. If that's the case, I don't see how they could be "nice" by default.
The only conclusion that makes sense is that the "nice guy" is an archetype -- a broad symbol for something unattainable. The people I see mostly using the phrase are ones that make bad relationship decisions and tend to make up excuses for those decisions.
Either that, or being a total wanker is somehow appealing to our sense of primal sexuality. That sounds wrong.