best recommendation letter ever
i asked my neighbor Marci for a letter of recommendation because i needed one more to apply for subbing in the district i went to school, livonia public. this is what she gave me...
To Whom It May Concern:
This letter is to recommend Julie Harris for a job at your school. Please, please hire Julie Harris, the neighbors want her out of the hood and her mother wants her out of the house fast.
I have known Julie for ten years. I was desperate for a babysitter so I hired Julie. She allowed my infant to roll off the couchand amazingly has totally blocked the incident out of her mind. God only knows what else she's blocked out of that pretty blond head of hers. Thankfully, after the couch incident, my child was unharmed and since I was so desperate for a babysitter I continued to hire Julie for sitting services. Each and every time my child was with Julie she came home wearing make up (making her look like a mini hooker) or some strange hairdo, wet clothing from being hosed down in the yard or bad breath from eating something weird. Really? Is hosing a kid down in the yard the best way to wash them off? Julie often asked to take Sam to the mall or to Target, for all I know they were picking up boys.
I really have no idea what kind of teacher Julie will turn out to be, hire her at your own risk, but whatever you do, please hire her.
(and then it is signed and whatnot)
...this made me laugh hardcore because i really did do most of the things listed...all except the picking up boys thing...but i did tell Sammy to tell her mom once that we were picking up boys...she was like three...it was great! When i was done reading this one Marci gave me the real letter of rec that was much more professional, with more correct grammar and did point to my teaching abilities since I have tutored Sammy for the past three summers. If I could hand this letter to a principal and actually get hired...i totally would because it is way cooler than any of my other ones!!
To Whom It May Concern:
This letter is to recommend Julie Harris for a job at your school. Please, please hire Julie Harris, the neighbors want her out of the hood and her mother wants her out of the house fast.
I have known Julie for ten years. I was desperate for a babysitter so I hired Julie. She allowed my infant to roll off the couchand amazingly has totally blocked the incident out of her mind. God only knows what else she's blocked out of that pretty blond head of hers. Thankfully, after the couch incident, my child was unharmed and since I was so desperate for a babysitter I continued to hire Julie for sitting services. Each and every time my child was with Julie she came home wearing make up (making her look like a mini hooker) or some strange hairdo, wet clothing from being hosed down in the yard or bad breath from eating something weird. Really? Is hosing a kid down in the yard the best way to wash them off? Julie often asked to take Sam to the mall or to Target, for all I know they were picking up boys.
I really have no idea what kind of teacher Julie will turn out to be, hire her at your own risk, but whatever you do, please hire her.
(and then it is signed and whatnot)
...this made me laugh hardcore because i really did do most of the things listed...all except the picking up boys thing...but i did tell Sammy to tell her mom once that we were picking up boys...she was like three...it was great! When i was done reading this one Marci gave me the real letter of rec that was much more professional, with more correct grammar and did point to my teaching abilities since I have tutored Sammy for the past three summers. If I could hand this letter to a principal and actually get hired...i totally would because it is way cooler than any of my other ones!!