10/16/05

[luckylissy]

I thought it was over.
I thought I was done.
But now, I think it's barely just begun.
I dread calling you
For fear that things will go back 6 months and be the same.
But I want to see you
Out of hope that you really are different
And not insane.
Please show me you care.
Please show me you're different.
And if you're not
I hope at least I have changed.
That I am no longer the same hopeless, naive, little girl I used to be.
That my mind has evolved along with my actions.
I hope that I am no longer quick to give my heart away, as I once was.
That I might use my brain this time, instead of my heart.
And see things for what they really are, and not what I want.
But more than anything.
I really hope that you are different.
That you're not just playing games.
That you're not insane.
I hope that you see what's going on.
And that you make up your mind and make an effort to come see me.
I've already done too much.
Because it's already too late for me to just forget you.
I like you and that's that.
And I truly hope that if you don't seem to care,
That I'll also stop caring.
Because I don't have time to always be so hurt.
I hope that this time
I really did change.