SCENE: Valant makes a delivery to Eldoon's Clinic
Valant: *One afternoon, Valant is on delivery duty for Lunchland, accompanied by the riceballs on his silk hat, to Eldoon's clinic. However, instead of walking in the door like a perfectly normal person, he stops and pulls out several round objects with fuses and a cheap yellow lighter. He lights the fuses on each of those objects and tosses them into the entrance of the clinic and picks up his order, ready to appear when the things detonate*
Receptionist: *She is minding her own business at her desk, playing Trauma Center, when the door to the clinic opens. She looks up expectantly, but there is no one there... only a rising column of smoke* Omigod! FIRE!
Valant: *Valant hears a girl screaming fire and figures that's his cue. He steps into the clinic and starts to twirl his cane to move away some of the smoke* Ahhhh ha ha ha ha haa! Whenever the mundane gives way to miracles, a word is whispered...Lunchland!
Receptionist: *She peers into the smoke; is that a man standing in the fire? Perhaps it is not, after all, a fire. She giggles nervously in response to the stranger's rather boisterous laugh* Sorry, what...?
Valant: It is I, Valant Gramarye. As seen on television. Here to deliver some delightful delicacies to make you drool!
Receptionist: *It seems to take her a minute to interpret what the hot yellow magician has said* Oh wow. You brought me lunch? Oh wow. *She giggles again* I like, totally loved your show as a kid. How did you know?
Valant: *Valant doesn't know what she means on how did he know, but decides to go with it to feed his ego* It is a pure primeval power I possess. Now then, *Valant sweeps his cloak across the desk and through a sleight of hand, the lunch boxes appear in a row* Here is the desired dishes, one Salmon Swirl and several of the fantastic fiesta boxes.
Receptionist: Oh! You, like, brought lunch for the doctor, too! That's, like, so nice of you! *She smiles up at him briefly. He's just as handsome as he was in the days of Troupe Gramarye, and she is suddenly conscious of her own appearance. Running her tongue across her teeth, she reaches for her Listerine pocket spray, to freshen up for a kiss*
Valant: Tragically, it is a time-consuming trade of mine that I do this. In between imagining illusions, of course.
Receptionist: *She sprays some minty freshness into the back of her throat, and stands up to meet the tall, handsome magician. It is only then, perhaps, that his words sink in.* Oh... So you're, like, delivering lunches for work? *All the same, a girl doesn't turn down a celebrity, even if he's delivering pizzas or something* Like, it's so sad you don't have Troupe Gramarye anymore. I mean, you could totally go it alone. Your entrance was, like, so flashy. *Leaning in, she gets another whiff of that smoke bomb* And... fiery. *It's not a pleasant smell, and she thoughtlessly pumps the breath freshener still in her hand, to mask it*
Valant: *The scent of the mint breath freshener overwhelms any other smells Valant would pick up and triggers his memory of a certain ugly and annoying man. Valant grips his staff and grits his teeth* BRUSHEL...!!! *After he uttered that one word, he clutches his stomach and doubles over in pain, obviously his ulcer is acting up*
Receptionist: Omigod! Are you all right? *She flaps her hands uselessly, unsure what to do about such a seizure.* I'll... I'll get Doctor Eldoon, all right? Here, sit in my chair, it's better than the ones in the waiting room...
Valant: *Valant does even say anything, he just sits in the receptionist's chair that she pushed around the desk for him, still holding his stomach*
Eldoon: *A few minutes pass before Eldoon appears in the lobby, having been pulled out of an exam by his hysterical receptionist who thought she had killed Valant Gramarye. Seeing the man, he is now less concerned with the fact that the lunch angel herself wasn't doing deliveries today.* A ten again, son? ... Any idea why it smells like smoke? And mint?
Valant: *In between moans of pain* This tragic...troublesome pain goes...beyond a ten! And that suffocating scent of mint is due to that young lady's device.
Eldoon: Oh, one of them breath fresheners? *He shakes his head in wonderment* That girl... Does she even know those things are s'posed to go in your mouth? Let's move you in back, away from all this air pollution. Can you walk?
Valant: I...truely think so. *Valant tries to get up and after a failed attempt, he succeeds and start shuffling to the back*
Eldoon: *Eldoon follows, pushing the receptionist's chair along with him in case the magician seems prone to collapse. They make it to the exam room without incident, however, and Eldoon pulls up the chair for himself next to the exam table* So what triggered this attack, son? What've you eaten today?
Valant: I have not indulged in anything that could aggravate this..terrible thing. It just happened after that aggressive air of mint assaulted my senses.
Eldoon: Mint, huh? *Eldoon rubs his chin thoughtfully.* Huh. Usually mint is good for settling the stomach, mm-hmm. Lie on your back, son. I want to be sure your ulcer ain't perforated.
Valant: As you wish...*Valant lies on his back, thinking about how mint to him will NEVER be good for any part of his health*
Eldoon: *Eldoon stands, and leans over Valant to palpitate his abdomen. He presses down hard and holds his hand there* That hurt less, or worse?
Valant: *When Eldoon presses on Valant's stomach, Valant hisses in pain* WORSE! A MILLION TIMES WORSE!
Eldoon: *Eldoon lets up quickly* Hmmph. That's a good sign, at least. Means you don't have nothing that needs surgery to fix up, yet. How frequent are these attacks, son? Daily, frequent, occasional?
Valant: ...Everytime when I get the suffocating scent of Scope...or rather anything that contains a major portion of mint.
Eldoon: Hmmph. Strangest allergy I ever heard of. You brush your teeth with, like, one of them strawberry toothpastes?
Valant: I do not partake in the toothpaste that is of strawberry. I can tolerate a tiny taste of mint, but if it's the only thing I can smell, my stomach starts striking me.
Eldoon: Hmmph. If only I had the money to pay you for a study, that kind of thing would be sure to get me published in the J.A.M.A, mm-hmm. But that ain't here nor there. I'm gonna set you up with some samples of cytotec, see what that does for you.
Valant: Cytotec? What manner of medication is this?
Eldoon: It's a prostaglandin, gonna reduce the amount of stomach acid that's irritating your minty ulcer. You aren't on any other medications, are you?
Valant: Aside from the medications that I have been obtaining over the counter, no.
Eldoon: Right, then. *Eldoon sits in the receptionist's chair again to lazily coast over to the drawer chock full of samples, and he digs out what he wants.* With this stuff, you don't want to be taking it within two hours, either way, of any over the counter antacids, you get me? You'll be taking it twice a day as a preventative measure-- with food. Lessee, what else... Assume you're not pregnant, so... that's all I got. *He wheels back over with a handful of blister packs*
Valant: *Valant takes the trial medication and puts it in his pocket.* You have my tremendous thanks. Though to transfer from this topic, there is the matter of your bill for the lunches.
Eldoon: Oh, of course. *Eldoon reaches into his pocket for his billfold.* What do I owe you for that?
Valant: *Valant takes out the receipt for the order and reads the total* It shall be 25 delightful dollars. Plus tip.
Eldoon: Hmmph. Now I know why I eat at my old man's stand more often than not. *But Eldoon is not completely broke, else he wouldn't have ordered lunch out solely to meet the Lunch Angel. He withdraws $30 from his wallet* There's that, then.
Valant: *Valant takes the money, counts it and tips his hat while smirking* Lunchland and it's lovely leader thanks you for your pleasurable patronage. Do not hesitate to summon us again!
Eldoon: *Eldoon decides not to upset his patient by admitting he's going to stick to ramen from here on out.* Sure thing, son. And likewise, don't hesitate to call if you're still having attacks while on that medication.
Valant: Surely, I shall summon you if something strikes my stomach. Farewell! *And with that, Valant turns around, flickering his cape while turning and walks out of the door...normally.*