turn down these voices inside my head
The worst is when it runs down your arms and you can feel it escaping through your palms. It hurts so much. Not physical pain, but when you're in so much emotional pain that you can just FEEL it moving through you, that's when it hurts the most. I'm not sure why I can feel it. To be honest it doesn't make any sense and sounds crazy when I think about it. You shouldn't be able to feel emotional pain, but I do. Maybe I'm the only one, but literally there's an ache that just moves through me and its only way out is to run through my hands. When it gets there, it is physically painful, actually.
Crying is the worst. I never cry. Almost never, anyway. I never have been much of a crier, that's probably why it sucks so much. I can hide it from myself until the tears come. Then I know how much it means to me, how much it will mean if I don't get it fixed or if I lose it. The only good thing about crying is that my eyes get really blue.
Everything happens for a reason, I know that. God, it's hard sometimes to really believe it, though. I know how I feel. I just wish he knew, but I can't make him. He can't even make himself.
Maybe waiting hurts the most.
Crying is the worst. I never cry. Almost never, anyway. I never have been much of a crier, that's probably why it sucks so much. I can hide it from myself until the tears come. Then I know how much it means to me, how much it will mean if I don't get it fixed or if I lose it. The only good thing about crying is that my eyes get really blue.
Everything happens for a reason, I know that. God, it's hard sometimes to really believe it, though. I know how I feel. I just wish he knew, but I can't make him. He can't even make himself.
Maybe waiting hurts the most.