A Twist: Makoto & Nephrite - Chapter 3
Freaking finally! After some minor writer's block, I have finally been able to finish this chapter. Many thanks again to mrcrybrilliance for allowing me to write in her Twist-verse, un-blocking my muses, and for setting me straight on punctuation and grammar. XD Love ya!!
Thanks also to the readers/reviewers both here and on ff.net! :)
On to the story...
A/N: Standard disclaimer applies. I don’t own these characters; I’m not making money off of them. Please don’t sue!
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Makoto cleaned. And she baked. And then she cleaned some more. And then she baked some more.
The apartment was now spotless, unless you took into consideration the stacks of cookies and muffins and baking pans that covered the kitchen counters.
‘Stressed’ was putting it mildly.
Rei approached as Makoto was scrubbing away at a dirtied cookie sheet. “Mako-chan? Are you, uh, OK?”
“YepI’mfine!” she hastily replied as she continued to scrub away.
“You do realize you’re about to scrub straight through the middle of that cookie sheet, right?”
Makoto only scrubbed harder.
Rei stepped forward and wrapped her arms around Makoto, her hands taking hold of Makoto’s soapy ones and pulling them away from her work. Reluctantly, Makoto released her firm grip on the dirty pan and scrubby sponge and turned to face Rei. Her face was red, her hair frazzled, and she was caked in flour. Rei stifled a giggle at her sister’s appearance. She knew what it was like to have a rough day and knew that this was Makoto’s way of dealing with it.
She also knew that her sister would be fine. She smiled. “We’re going to be heading to Mamoru’s soon. Why don’t you go shower up and let me finish cleaning this for you?”
Makoto frowned. “Is it that time already?”
Rei nodded. “Yes, hon. It’s that time.”
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Makoto had remained mostly quiet on the walk to Mamoru’s apartment. The other girls laughed and carried on and had tried to include Makoto in their conversations, yet the taller girl kept mostly to herself. She needed to gather her thoughts and decide on what to say to Nephrite. Things would be alright, wouldn’t they?
She sucked in her breath as she heard the buzzer which signaled the unlocking of the door so they could enter.
The girls moved to the elevator and Usagi pressed the call button. After entering, Makoto closed her eyes and leaned against the back wall as the elevator rose to Mamoru’s floor. It was a short ride, yet her heart pounded harder as each floor passed with a “beep.”
Finally, there was a “ding” of a bell, signaling that they’d reached their stop. Ami looked to Makoto, their strong sister whose face was now pale, and took hold of her hand. Mako glanced down at the hand that was now in Ami’s grasp and felt her sister give it a light squeeze. It was a silent reminder that she had support, and that was all she needed for motivation to leave the elevator.
Mamoru smiled to the girls as he opened the door to the apartment. They all exchanged greetings, Makoto only giving a brief nod as she entered. He looked to Usagi, as he knew Makoto was not usually so removed. Usagi shook her head, a signal for him not to worry. He nodded and gave her a brief kiss on the forehead before shutting the door to the apartment.
The other girls took their usual seats around the room, but Makoto wanted somewhere a bit more private. She chose a space beside the window, away from the others, and sat with her legs curled under her. She stared out to the sky, taking in the colors as the sun began its descent towards the horizon.
As was customary, Mamoru went to the desk where the stones were kept in their glass case and opened the lid. “Our company has arrived, gentlemen.”
Four spirits materialized and moved towards their Senshi. Nephrite hesitated for a moment, not seeing Makoto in her usual seat, but quickly spotted her beside the window. He frowned slightly, having sensed her dream from last night, and knew that their discussion today would most likely be a tough one.
Makoto kept her eyes on the sunset as Nephrite came to sit beside her. He gazed out the window with her, content with the quiet between them for the moment. All the others were already busy in their discussions, laughing and carrying on. Yet for Makoto and Nephrite, silence reigned.
After what seemed like ages, Makoto finally spoke, though her eyes never left the window.
“I suppose you know about last night.” He only replied with a slow nod, though she didn’t look to see. “Though the dream itself was more than painful, it’s who was in it that made it all the more hard to bear.”
Nephrite tried to roll through as many memories as possible, mentally adding and removing people that the dream could have been about. She continued without his input.
“I know about her, Nephrite.”
If he had a physical heart, it would have skipped a beat, and not in a good way. Those were the exact words he’d heard once before, although it had been eons since the last time. A memory flowed through his mind, the entire scene playing out before him once again. History truly had a way of repeating itself. He cringed internally, knowing what would probably come next.
“Makoto, if I may expla-“
“Nephrite, there is nothing to explain. I know what I saw, I know what happened. What’s done is done. I know there had to have been a resolution, because we were still together until… until the fall.” She wrung her hands as she spoke, trying to find the courage for her next words. “So, I’m okay with that. I can handle that.”
He raised an eyebrow. That wasn’t what he expected. Not what he expected at all. He thought there would be anger and yelling and punches thrown, just like last time. But no, this time she was much calmer. And frankly, it scared him.
Her voice lowered, she continued. “But the problem is…” Tears began to well up in her eyes, and she bit her lip in an attempt to fight them back.
While he could not see her face directly, Nephrite knew she was in pain. He wanted so desperately to be able to take her in his arms and hold her. To stroke her curly brown hair and kiss her forehead and reassure her that he truly loved her and her only. Had he been in a physical body at this moment, he would have cried with her. Instead, he just let her talk.
“The problem is,” and for the first time that evening, Makoto turned to look Nephrite in the eye, “she’s still alive, Nephrite. She’s been reborn, just like all of us. I used to see her nearly every day while we were in school. Usagi is her best friend. She’s right there in my life, all the time.” She couldn’t hold the tears back any longer, and two escaped to streak down her face. “I know I said what’s done is done. But that was the past. This is now. What am I supposed to do if you find yourself reincarnated again? What am I supposed to do when she sees you and recognizes you? What then?” In an attempt to keep herself from bawling, she turned back to the window and buried her face in her hands.
Nephrite sat with his jaw agape. He blinked a few times, trying to process everything that Makoto had just shared. After a period of silence, he finally found his voice. "I know, and I’m so very sorry. I really don’t even know how to begin to put into words how sorry I am for the pain I’ve caused.” He frowned, recalling the pain he’d caused her all those years ago for not being honest and knowing that she was now suffering pain at his hands once again. This was his chance to make things right, to be honest, to tell her the truth.
“There is… something else I need to tell you about." He grimaced as she turned to look at him, that familiar hurt in her eyes. "Please, just let me explain. I… Beryl used me before you woke up. I don't know, maybe her power was weakening or something, but some bit of humanity slipped into me..." He sighed realizing he was starting with an excuse rather than an explanation.
"Let me start over. I came up with a different strategy to collect energy for Beryl, since Jadeite's hadn't worked out so well. I developed a disguise so that I could get close enough to take the energy of one person, rather than attacking many people at once."
Makoto raised an eyebrow. She knew about this already, so why was he bringing it all up again? Instead of interrupting, she decided it best to just listen as he continued.
“I was a very horrible, evil person while under Beryl’s control. I lied and deceived to get my way. I used many people to gather energy and attack your sister Senshi. However, no matter my plan, there was only one person who saw through those deceptions. She believed I could be a good person, even though all I did was lie to her. Still, I continued in my dark ways, even using her as a puppet to get what I wanted.”
Her eyes narrowed, Makoto was trying to understand all that Nephrite was telling her. He was good now, right? So what did all that matter? And who is ‘she’? Nephrite noticed her confused look.
“There is a point. I’m getting there, I promise.”
She slowly nodded, and he continued.
“Despite the evil things I did to her and all of her friends, she still claimed to love me. I couldn’t understand how a person could continue to show such compassion after all I’d done. Even after admitting who I was and what I was after, she believed I could be good.”
He paused for a moment, hoping Makoto was processing all he was saying before he finished. He glanced out the window, sending a silent message to the stars that were now twinkling through the twilight, begging them to be on his side again. When he received no answer, he looked back to Makoto and saw the questioning look upon her face. He sighed. This was his time to be honest, and, no matter the pain, he needed to tell her everything.
“Makoto, my disguise was that of Sanjouin Masato, and that girl was Osaka Naru.”
Her eyes locked with his, her mouth agape. She felt as if all the oxygen had been sucked from her lungs. She gasped for air, bordering on hyperventilation.
“Mako, she made me laugh! Me! A Dark Kingdom general! Genuinely, honestly laugh! She showed me kindness, love. I found humanity through her. She forgave me for all the wrong I’d done. Though I never fully returned the feelings she expressed, it took my death for me to finally understand what those feelings were. If it hadn’t been for her…”
Tears were once again falling from Makoto’s eyes. Her breathing had slowed again, a calm coming back to her. Her face began to redden, and Nephrite didn’t know if it was from the crying or if it was anger. After a moment, she spoke, her voice low.
“Did you know who she was? That she was your…”
He shook his head. “No. I had no idea until after I’d died and my soul was locked within the stone. My memories returned then, of the Silver Millennium, of her, of you…”
She narrowed her eyes and looked into his, her voice slow and calm. “She may not have her memories, but in this life she knows who you are; according to you, not only as Masato, but as Nephrite too. She thinks you’re dead. She mourned for you, rather openly, for weeks. She continues to mourn you silently still. Even though she’s with someone else now, she still talks about you.”
Nephrite frowned and shook his head again. “She’s a good person, Makoto. She has a good heart. You can’t hold this against her. This is my fault. Be angry with me, but don’t blame her.”
Makoto’s face reddened further, and she began to raise her voice. “Oh, you are damn right this is your fault, and you’d better believe I am angry with you. Beryl or not, you made this girl fall in love with you. And while she has forgiven you, I’m not sure I can.”
“Mako, please-“
She shook her head and held up her hand. “No. No, you listen to me. I am not going to have to compete with another woman for your attention.”
“Mako, you know I love only you.”
“Yeah, well what happens when you’re free of the stone? What happens when she sees you again, very much alive?? What if she reclaims her memories too? What then?”
“I…I don’t know. I really don’t know what she’ll do,” he pleaded with her, “but I know that I will still only love you, as I always have!”
Her eyes narrowed at him again, her voice raised and becoming higher pitched. “How can I trust you? You’ve betrayed me time after time! How am I supposed to believe that this time will be different?”
“Mako, please understand, I’ve always loved only you! Even through all that, I’ve always come back to you.”
Her voice rose further, on the verge of yelling. “Is that what I am? Someone for you to come back to when nothing else goes the way you’d planned?” She shook her head and stood. “Well I’m not letting you do it again. I’ve had all the heartbreak I need in this lifetime. I don’t need you to add to it again.”
He jumped up as well and tried reaching for her, cursing as his non-corporal hand passed through hers.
At this point, the conversations of the other occupants of the apartment had stopped, and all eyes were now trained on Makoto and Nephrite. They all remained silent, shocked at the scene playing out before them.
She stepped back as he reached out a second time. Even though he couldn’t grab her, she still felt the need to further distance herself.
“I do hope your bond with the stone is eventually broken. You do deserve at least that much. But when it happens, don’t…” She began to choke on her words as tears rose to the surface again. “When it happens, don’t come looking for me, because I won’t be there.”
“Mako, wait! Please don’t…”
She held up her hand to stop him. “It’s over, Nephrite. I won’t let you hurt me again.”
Makoto turned and walked to the door. She paused to look back at her friends. “I’m sorry. I just can’t do this anymore.” She left the apartment, the door closing with a light ‘click’ that echoed through the silent room.
Nephrite stared at the door for a moment, wishing that this was all just some cruel joke and that she’d come back. When the door didn’t open again, he sighed. If she would only realize that he really did love only her. He looked to the group that was staring at him. Nobody spoke, not knowing what to say.
He attempted a smile, which came across more like a grimace, before fading away and returning to the stone. He still didn’t know how it had ended so quickly and with such anger, but he was damn sure that he was going to figure out how to make it up to her, even if it took an eternity.