wide asleep

May 15, 2005 00:28

i dream of blue skies and mushroom clouds and i see in black and white and i hate/love/hate myself and sometimes i think of my past how it is pointless and other times i think of my future how terrified of it all i am and i really wish i could stop smoking cigarettes and i really wish i was a better person and i feel like shit half the time i'm smiling and sometimes i wish i was someone else anyone else but me and i should've stayed in school and i should never have pawned my guitar and i should have kept my eyes on the road and i don't know what i am going to do and i wish life wasn't the way it is and i wish i had some of the answers instead of having none and i wish i could find a job that i like and i long for seeing something new anything new
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