This is my life, it's not what it was before. All these feeling, they are my dreams...
This is a somewhat bad Christmas indeed.
First, with the mother thing. First Christmas without my mother. This saddens me to a point.
Second, is issues with friends. They lying and everything. It hurts, and it will be on my mind for a long while. But not too bad. ;)
Third, my uncle. He is having hard times. He is only my half uncle on my dads, moms side. He, like everyone lately, is going through a divorce. I don't know the terms of his, though. But he called my dad not long ago, and my dad said that my uncle was saying stuff that just wasn't "right". I don't know exactly what he said, but I think we can all imagine.
This is the same uncle I saved from killing himself when I was a baby. I didn't know that until last year, until he told me how. He told me he had no one left and was so depressed, then when I was born, it was like he has something to live for once again. The story mad me cry last year.
I hope he comes to his senses and doesn't do anything stupid.
As much as I am trying to fight certain feelings, they still linger. But I love Christmas. It's one of my favourite Holiday's, so I will not let the first two problems bother me too bad. It's just the third one I worry about.
I am so tired right now. I never believe people when they said they could get exhausted on and over worked mind. I believe it now.
Anyway, it will just be my dad and I tomorrow. Can't say I don't like it being just the two of us. I'm sure it will be fine. He, however, forgot deserts. So, we will be going out for desert. I just hope my dad is fine tomorrow. He should be.
Like every year, it is tradition for the only child of the family (the wonderful I) to open one gift on Christmas Eve. I did. My lovely Grandmother sent me three pairs or toe socks. I was joyed. I love socks. I think it's an odd fetish or something. They are cute.
I put the giant Poinsetta bow on my dads head. He would not wear it to the neighbors when he went to visit. Made me sad.
The thought of maggots are running through my mind. Stupid movie. I hate maggots.
Once again for the 4th time....MERRY CHRISTMAS, everyone.
I'm going to make tomorrow the best day I can. No more walking around the house, bored and pissed off.
Being pissed is not fun. The unworthy people that are bringing this onto me, will be blocked from my mind. They are not going ruin my Christmas.
And I just had strong Deja Vu...I love it when that happens. Creepy.
My posts are getting more and more pointless. Oh well.
Have a good night everyone.
First, with the mother thing. First Christmas without my mother. This saddens me to a point.
Second, is issues with friends. They lying and everything. It hurts, and it will be on my mind for a long while. But not too bad. ;)
Third, my uncle. He is having hard times. He is only my half uncle on my dads, moms side. He, like everyone lately, is going through a divorce. I don't know the terms of his, though. But he called my dad not long ago, and my dad said that my uncle was saying stuff that just wasn't "right". I don't know exactly what he said, but I think we can all imagine.
This is the same uncle I saved from killing himself when I was a baby. I didn't know that until last year, until he told me how. He told me he had no one left and was so depressed, then when I was born, it was like he has something to live for once again. The story mad me cry last year.
I hope he comes to his senses and doesn't do anything stupid.
As much as I am trying to fight certain feelings, they still linger. But I love Christmas. It's one of my favourite Holiday's, so I will not let the first two problems bother me too bad. It's just the third one I worry about.
I am so tired right now. I never believe people when they said they could get exhausted on and over worked mind. I believe it now.
Anyway, it will just be my dad and I tomorrow. Can't say I don't like it being just the two of us. I'm sure it will be fine. He, however, forgot deserts. So, we will be going out for desert. I just hope my dad is fine tomorrow. He should be.
Like every year, it is tradition for the only child of the family (the wonderful I) to open one gift on Christmas Eve. I did. My lovely Grandmother sent me three pairs or toe socks. I was joyed. I love socks. I think it's an odd fetish or something. They are cute.
I put the giant Poinsetta bow on my dads head. He would not wear it to the neighbors when he went to visit. Made me sad.
The thought of maggots are running through my mind. Stupid movie. I hate maggots.
Once again for the 4th time....MERRY CHRISTMAS, everyone.
I'm going to make tomorrow the best day I can. No more walking around the house, bored and pissed off.
Being pissed is not fun. The unworthy people that are bringing this onto me, will be blocked from my mind. They are not going ruin my Christmas.
And I just had strong Deja Vu...I love it when that happens. Creepy.
My posts are getting more and more pointless. Oh well.
Have a good night everyone.