Everything I needed to know about life, I learned from LiveJournal.
I was thinking about the situation of the anorexics - some of whom are the STUPIDEST people I have ever come across in my life, example being the girl who took an eight-message-long thread before understanding that she was leaving comments in my journal - and wondering why some LiveJournals attract drama and others don't
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Some people can do polyamorous, and do it quite well at that, but I know that I am not one of them. The main reason is that I have a jealous streak a mile wide and I couldn't handle my significant other having another relationship.
If I ever were to involve myself, sexually, with another woman, it would have to be a one-night-stand type deal, not a relationship, which makes it more "swinging" than polyamory, and it would also have to include my husband (see note about jealousy streak; it goes both ways in our marriage!) But this is *highly* unlikely to happen. In fact, it would never happen. We joke about hiring a tantrika for our tenth wedding anniversary or something, but that's as far as it will ever go.
I realize I have been joking a lot about this lately, more than I even think about it, and I am not sure why all of the sudden. Perhaps it is because I have allowed myself to entertain the notion that my sexuality isn't 100% straight, and that is ok. But the fact of the matter is that I married with the understanding that we are monogamous, and that is a contract and vow I intend to honor.
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*muah*
Dropping the serious____ness
<33, Jayde
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In Season 2, Charlotte finds herself mesmerized by the emerging "Power Lesbians" of Manhattan. She begins to hang out in their community, enjoying the conversation of a man-free, woman centered environment. She is finding rapid acceptance of herself in this tight-knit circle, and is extended an invitation to spend the weekend in an exclusive environment with the most powerful lesbian in NYC and her closest friends.
At a gathering where she finally meets this powerful woman (whose name eludes me, therefore I will just call her "Pat" from now on), Pat takes Charlotte aside and asks her the question everyone has been dying to know: Is She Gay?
Charlotte responds that, although she doesn't find herself sexually attracted to women, she has really been enjoying her "newfound sisterhood" and the company of women unencumbered by the burden of male desires and interference, etc.
Pat's tongue-in-cheek response (and the punchline): "If you're not going to eat pussy, you're not a dyke." Door slams shut.
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I joined the polyamory community when I first created my LJ account, mostly out of curiousity but also because of the incredible snarkiness that used to prevail there. A surprising number of well-educated, emotionally healthy people have adopted this lovestyle; they even involve their children (not in the relationships but as a part of the extended families) in an overall healthy and well-adjusted environment. The common factor for success seems to be ethical, meaning no 'cheating,' secret relationships, dishonesty, and the like. There must be total honest, open communication between all involved parties as well as clear, well-defined boundaries to be adhered to. Jealousy simply does not have its place, although I assure you that it rears its ugly head from time to time, particularly in relationships where one partner is new to the concept of polyamory.
To people like you and me, who for the most part are suited for monogamy, all of that seems to be very confusing and a lot of unnecessary complicated hard work.
But for the folks who seem hardwired for non-monogamy, polyamory seems to work quite well when basic ground rules are followed.
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Which is why he insists that he was only joking when he made that offer.
And I don't doubt for one second that he would not consider a girlfriend. Ferchrissakes, I had to stalk him for, like, three months before it dawned upon him that I could be romantically interested. Talk about low self-esteem.
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