no sympathy--sentiment--nonsense...
so i was talking to my love on the phone this afternoon and i've pretty much decided that my character, my personality, and everything that i have to offer is shit.
it really is, you just dont realize it.
and i feel jealous that i'm not much like sarah in some ways.
shes so strong, and so...
everything that i want to be.
she can resist so many things--she's so strong and can be as cold as ice if she wants to be.
completely pityless. completely merciless.
at least thats how i've percieved her.
shes so much like an estella havisham. or a daisy buchanan.
and i'm...more like an ophelia.
but hopefully not psychotic.
i really liked her during fall last year. and apparently she was fucking with my head.
that was our beginning.
thats bad.
and its my fault, because i trusted her and...
i'm weak and vulnerable and leap at any chance that someone gives me attention.
and i desperately want to change that. desperately.
i'm NOT talking to ANY boys at maria's sweet 16 tonight.
it really is, you just dont realize it.
and i feel jealous that i'm not much like sarah in some ways.
shes so strong, and so...
everything that i want to be.
she can resist so many things--she's so strong and can be as cold as ice if she wants to be.
completely pityless. completely merciless.
at least thats how i've percieved her.
shes so much like an estella havisham. or a daisy buchanan.
and i'm...more like an ophelia.
but hopefully not psychotic.
i really liked her during fall last year. and apparently she was fucking with my head.
that was our beginning.
thats bad.
and its my fault, because i trusted her and...
i'm weak and vulnerable and leap at any chance that someone gives me attention.
and i desperately want to change that. desperately.
i'm NOT talking to ANY boys at maria's sweet 16 tonight.