Aspasia - A cabin - 6/1/2009 (Part II)
I am Raven.
The contents of this tome are not heresy, they are the truth as I know it. The contents of this tome are in part the story of my Requiem and of the Clan Gangrel, as you will see. These are my findings- all told with as much truth as I can put them down in without endangering and secrets of Clan, Covenant or Kin… though the summation of these words will jeopardize all…
***
The Amazon methodically begins to read Raven's Journal, sipping once from the flask he provided for her. About half way through the tome, When the moon starts to lower behind the trees, Aspasia moves inside, turning on a single light for illumination as she curls up on a chair near the windows.
Here and there, she makes a sigh or exhales as if in revelation. She comes to a section that makes her pause as she re-reads two paragraphs over and over....
***
I stand on the bridge between the dark and the light, a creature of both. I hold back the greater darkness because it must be done and there are few to do it. I sacrifice of myself to better the world and keep the Great Destroyer, the Void, at bay. There are none better suited for it than I… than us… we are the Ravenscarred and this is our creed.
I hold the balance for the good of all. I walk where others would fail. I look into the eyes of Madness, into depths of Darkness and return to be as a candle of hope in the night, holding the secrets I've found to keep them at bay and I guide the steps of those who would listen for their own good sake because there are none better suited for it than I… I am Raven and this is my creed.
***
"Exodus' hand is here, martyr for the cause. But the rest, yes love - you would be a candle to all, while I hoped to light your steps back to my side." Her voice is wistful.
Silence is broken in the cabin, as the distant clock chimes the passing of an hour.
Raven scribes as if telling a tale, alternating with his personal observations and notes. One such story is a conversation with his sire...
***
"I am with you. We walk together, as ever. The others will not understand, but that was always figured into this for when we made the decision to do this."
Exodus nods, “Yeah I think it's time regardless of their thoughts.”
Raven replies, "Agreed. It is time."
---
"More than likely we will be alone soon.” Exodus comments.
Raven meets his eyes. "Does it matter?"
***
Aspasia stops, shaking her head as she murmurs, "It mattered. You could not reach out, ask where only the asking was needed?"
Minutes pass, with only the rustle of turning pages, when she discovers a section he has written about the clan dagger which was for months in his possession. Pausing, she pulls it out from the sheathe hidden inside her left boot, and glances from it to the page and back again as she reads.
***
This Dagger that calls to the Blood of the Gangrel like a siren song. This Dagger that resists even scratches from my Talons though it is made of simple ancient Bronze. This Dagger that is covered in layers of script in ancient tongues, even in layers beneath it’s surface in certain light. Never have I seen the like.
It is a puzzle I must unravel. I would record the translations however I find that a dangerous proposition until I know what it says. I would not cipher a spell just to record it here for it to snare this page’s next reader. That this item is ensorcelled is obvious. That it is tied to the Clan is equally so. That it might give me answers to the truth of the Unholy is speculation. But not entirely.
***
Now Aspasia's attention is captured. While she continues to read the journal, each mention of the dagger is scrutinized. She rips out a blank page from the end, so she can make notes of the important passages in her own handwriting.
***
Research along those lines makes a location pretty clear. The Aksumite empire existed from at least the 1st century AD until the late 10th century and took up what is now northern Ethiopia and Eritrea. The town of Aksum (or Axum) still exists. And examining maps will show the great Lake Tana (as now known) which is at nearly 2,000m altitude, and is the source of the Blue Nile. This must logically be the “sky sea”, and it is easy enough then to follow the two thousand paces downriver. We reach a slight turn in the river and it feels “right”.
The dagger’s blade has vague runes on it that I could not read, and research into the matter has not thrown any light on it. I took to meditating on the blade and this once, sitting in this location by the river, after I held it in my hands for most of a night, I felt as if my beast was reaching for it seeking understanding. I allowed this to happen and I gained what seemed like a natural understanding of the item - that it was made by a Gangrel many years in the past. That it has the essence of that Kindred’s loyalty to his Clan instilled in it. That a Gangrel should feed the blade with his vitae at least once, to bind it to himself, and that the blade will not willingly strike another Gangrel. That these things can only happen after its possessor proves their devotion to it as I have.
I fed the blade with my vitae by cutting himself, then I was struck by a powerful sense of self and a powerful link of loyalty to the Clan. I also “remembered” certain experiences of previous wielders of the dagger - a deeper and more detailed memory than the previous glimpses of its path through time.
---
As for the memories, *all* of the individuals whose memories I now share, remember the Unholy, or at least a figure that is reminiscent of her. The myth goes back further than I had imagined, though there are always differences. Notable here that this means the legend extends to Europe and Africa at the very least. The Norse warrior has met her and faced her. He believes that he has killed her, even though it is a memory that gives him no joy. He felt he did the right thing, but he also feels that it makes no difference. He sees her as a force of nature rather than an individual.
The old woman has a theory, I remember it as if it was a theory I had come up with myself. I can only reveal it to my Heart, in time. It fills me with sorrow to know I must soon leave this form behind.
***
At this mention of the Unholy, Aspasia growls under her breath, the hatred embraced now like a comforting, old friend. Raven made mention of his Grandsire in passages already, but this - knowing how he died at the monster's hands, makes the edge of her vision almost red with anger.
***
I focused my will to add to the Dagger a legacy of my own. I believe it has kept it.
Aspasia, forgive me, this cup I cannot pass to another. Hear me and understand.
Gangrel, Remember us, Exodus Celestine and Raven, for we shall remain within you. Always.
~Raven.
***
Only the top of the page contains Raven's words, the rest remains blank, but as she flips again, his writing continues, the inscription beginning with the phrase "Beloved Aspasia..."
She stops, lifting her eyes from the journal, and turning her head away. The woman swallows as she folds the book against her chest. Cradling it to her breast.
Then, steeling herself to continue, Aspasia focuses again on the tome in her hands.
***
Beloved Aspasia,
These pages are only for you- no other will see them unless you will it. Business first, I’m afraid… as ever.
The theory I hint at in the journal that I have given you and my Childer a copy of is thus…
***
The Amazon's fingers skim each line of his writing. It has been decades since she exercised any focus on the mystical and occult arts, but his words make a strange sense. It feels right what Raven and Exodus believe.
And the very fact of that rightness makes her jaw clench and her stomach churn. If these masters of the Ordo are correct, then her plans must change. And she can not lightly share them with any.
Lest they try to stop her.
Fragments only of the next section catch her gaze, while the Amazon finds it hard to focus on the book, instead of her own inner turmoil. She fingers the dagger, pricking herself with the blade did in recent moons, binding it to her firmly. She can feel the runes along the surface, but does not study them now even so much as tracing the outlines. Rather she simply clenches and unclenches her fist, until she slides it back into place inside her boot.
***
...I believe you understand now my theory, now let me explain our insane plan.
...We are blood of her blood. We must help her, even if that means we must be consumed, to add our strength to hers, to hold off the Unholy until which time someone figures out how to slay the Unholy once and for all…
...So now for all we love, we must go and seek her. I do not know how, but the Dagger is tied to the Fate of the Unholy, and if it involves more than just the Gangrel, items of the other Clans may be involved as well. We have spent long nights considering these actions...
I am unafraid.
Know that it is with the deepest regrets that I could not spend more time with you, my true love, my salvation, my Heart. Know that you have made all the difference in this dark and dreary world to me.
Grieve not for me for I shall return again when the wheel turns once more, once the Unholy is no more and my soul is free. I may not know you or myself then but somehow I will find you.
Always, Eternally,
Raven
***
Aspasia's eyes close as she head drops foward. No tears come, the sorrow is to profound for that.
"I understand, my love. The why. Which I did not before."
"I do not forgive you for abandoning me. But, I understand."
She speaks into the empty night air, touching the page of scribbled, copied notes which is at her side. "This fills the knowledge missing and I know what must be done now. To free you both."
The contents of this tome are not heresy, they are the truth as I know it. The contents of this tome are in part the story of my Requiem and of the Clan Gangrel, as you will see. These are my findings- all told with as much truth as I can put them down in without endangering and secrets of Clan, Covenant or Kin… though the summation of these words will jeopardize all…
***
The Amazon methodically begins to read Raven's Journal, sipping once from the flask he provided for her. About half way through the tome, When the moon starts to lower behind the trees, Aspasia moves inside, turning on a single light for illumination as she curls up on a chair near the windows.
Here and there, she makes a sigh or exhales as if in revelation. She comes to a section that makes her pause as she re-reads two paragraphs over and over....
***
I stand on the bridge between the dark and the light, a creature of both. I hold back the greater darkness because it must be done and there are few to do it. I sacrifice of myself to better the world and keep the Great Destroyer, the Void, at bay. There are none better suited for it than I… than us… we are the Ravenscarred and this is our creed.
I hold the balance for the good of all. I walk where others would fail. I look into the eyes of Madness, into depths of Darkness and return to be as a candle of hope in the night, holding the secrets I've found to keep them at bay and I guide the steps of those who would listen for their own good sake because there are none better suited for it than I… I am Raven and this is my creed.
***
"Exodus' hand is here, martyr for the cause. But the rest, yes love - you would be a candle to all, while I hoped to light your steps back to my side." Her voice is wistful.
Silence is broken in the cabin, as the distant clock chimes the passing of an hour.
Raven scribes as if telling a tale, alternating with his personal observations and notes. One such story is a conversation with his sire...
***
"I am with you. We walk together, as ever. The others will not understand, but that was always figured into this for when we made the decision to do this."
Exodus nods, “Yeah I think it's time regardless of their thoughts.”
Raven replies, "Agreed. It is time."
---
"More than likely we will be alone soon.” Exodus comments.
Raven meets his eyes. "Does it matter?"
***
Aspasia stops, shaking her head as she murmurs, "It mattered. You could not reach out, ask where only the asking was needed?"
Minutes pass, with only the rustle of turning pages, when she discovers a section he has written about the clan dagger which was for months in his possession. Pausing, she pulls it out from the sheathe hidden inside her left boot, and glances from it to the page and back again as she reads.
***
This Dagger that calls to the Blood of the Gangrel like a siren song. This Dagger that resists even scratches from my Talons though it is made of simple ancient Bronze. This Dagger that is covered in layers of script in ancient tongues, even in layers beneath it’s surface in certain light. Never have I seen the like.
It is a puzzle I must unravel. I would record the translations however I find that a dangerous proposition until I know what it says. I would not cipher a spell just to record it here for it to snare this page’s next reader. That this item is ensorcelled is obvious. That it is tied to the Clan is equally so. That it might give me answers to the truth of the Unholy is speculation. But not entirely.
***
Now Aspasia's attention is captured. While she continues to read the journal, each mention of the dagger is scrutinized. She rips out a blank page from the end, so she can make notes of the important passages in her own handwriting.
***
Research along those lines makes a location pretty clear. The Aksumite empire existed from at least the 1st century AD until the late 10th century and took up what is now northern Ethiopia and Eritrea. The town of Aksum (or Axum) still exists. And examining maps will show the great Lake Tana (as now known) which is at nearly 2,000m altitude, and is the source of the Blue Nile. This must logically be the “sky sea”, and it is easy enough then to follow the two thousand paces downriver. We reach a slight turn in the river and it feels “right”.
The dagger’s blade has vague runes on it that I could not read, and research into the matter has not thrown any light on it. I took to meditating on the blade and this once, sitting in this location by the river, after I held it in my hands for most of a night, I felt as if my beast was reaching for it seeking understanding. I allowed this to happen and I gained what seemed like a natural understanding of the item - that it was made by a Gangrel many years in the past. That it has the essence of that Kindred’s loyalty to his Clan instilled in it. That a Gangrel should feed the blade with his vitae at least once, to bind it to himself, and that the blade will not willingly strike another Gangrel. That these things can only happen after its possessor proves their devotion to it as I have.
I fed the blade with my vitae by cutting himself, then I was struck by a powerful sense of self and a powerful link of loyalty to the Clan. I also “remembered” certain experiences of previous wielders of the dagger - a deeper and more detailed memory than the previous glimpses of its path through time.
---
As for the memories, *all* of the individuals whose memories I now share, remember the Unholy, or at least a figure that is reminiscent of her. The myth goes back further than I had imagined, though there are always differences. Notable here that this means the legend extends to Europe and Africa at the very least. The Norse warrior has met her and faced her. He believes that he has killed her, even though it is a memory that gives him no joy. He felt he did the right thing, but he also feels that it makes no difference. He sees her as a force of nature rather than an individual.
The old woman has a theory, I remember it as if it was a theory I had come up with myself. I can only reveal it to my Heart, in time. It fills me with sorrow to know I must soon leave this form behind.
***
At this mention of the Unholy, Aspasia growls under her breath, the hatred embraced now like a comforting, old friend. Raven made mention of his Grandsire in passages already, but this - knowing how he died at the monster's hands, makes the edge of her vision almost red with anger.
***
I focused my will to add to the Dagger a legacy of my own. I believe it has kept it.
Aspasia, forgive me, this cup I cannot pass to another. Hear me and understand.
Gangrel, Remember us, Exodus Celestine and Raven, for we shall remain within you. Always.
~Raven.
***
Only the top of the page contains Raven's words, the rest remains blank, but as she flips again, his writing continues, the inscription beginning with the phrase "Beloved Aspasia..."
She stops, lifting her eyes from the journal, and turning her head away. The woman swallows as she folds the book against her chest. Cradling it to her breast.
Then, steeling herself to continue, Aspasia focuses again on the tome in her hands.
***
Beloved Aspasia,
These pages are only for you- no other will see them unless you will it. Business first, I’m afraid… as ever.
The theory I hint at in the journal that I have given you and my Childer a copy of is thus…
***
The Amazon's fingers skim each line of his writing. It has been decades since she exercised any focus on the mystical and occult arts, but his words make a strange sense. It feels right what Raven and Exodus believe.
And the very fact of that rightness makes her jaw clench and her stomach churn. If these masters of the Ordo are correct, then her plans must change. And she can not lightly share them with any.
Lest they try to stop her.
Fragments only of the next section catch her gaze, while the Amazon finds it hard to focus on the book, instead of her own inner turmoil. She fingers the dagger, pricking herself with the blade did in recent moons, binding it to her firmly. She can feel the runes along the surface, but does not study them now even so much as tracing the outlines. Rather she simply clenches and unclenches her fist, until she slides it back into place inside her boot.
***
...I believe you understand now my theory, now let me explain our insane plan.
...We are blood of her blood. We must help her, even if that means we must be consumed, to add our strength to hers, to hold off the Unholy until which time someone figures out how to slay the Unholy once and for all…
...So now for all we love, we must go and seek her. I do not know how, but the Dagger is tied to the Fate of the Unholy, and if it involves more than just the Gangrel, items of the other Clans may be involved as well. We have spent long nights considering these actions...
I am unafraid.
Know that it is with the deepest regrets that I could not spend more time with you, my true love, my salvation, my Heart. Know that you have made all the difference in this dark and dreary world to me.
Grieve not for me for I shall return again when the wheel turns once more, once the Unholy is no more and my soul is free. I may not know you or myself then but somehow I will find you.
Always, Eternally,
Raven
***
Aspasia's eyes close as she head drops foward. No tears come, the sorrow is to profound for that.
"I understand, my love. The why. Which I did not before."
"I do not forgive you for abandoning me. But, I understand."
She speaks into the empty night air, touching the page of scribbled, copied notes which is at her side. "This fills the knowledge missing and I know what must be done now. To free you both."