(Untitled)

[semper_cogitans]

Who: semper_cogitans, though with replies coming from herpderpetile, and i_speak_softly. I pity anybody else who might join in advance :|;;
What: Probably the most awkward, hormone-spiked bath ever
When: March 31st, during the Unofficial Derpturtle Sleepover
Where: House 55
Summary: Robert has just the luck to be turned into a mutant red-eared slider in the middle of spring mating season,

Comments

[i_speak_softly]

Don hasn't seen Robert in a while - if the meaning of 'a while' is now 'a couple of hours'. That's mostly on purpose: he had locked himself in the back room for many of the same reasons that Robert has been hiding in a corner.

Now, though, he's come out, his own computer tucked under his arm, in search of the erstwhile turtle.

He finds him, sitting on the floor near Derek's room and not looking at all well.

He tilts his head in concern. "Robert? You look like you're going to pass out..."

[herpderpetile]

It actually takes a few seconds for Robert to look up. He's bleary-eyed, a little bit, and he blinks a few times at Donatello's voice. Even now, it's a struggle to get these foreign, unusually-intense desires under control.

"... Admittedly, I do not feel entirely healthy at the moment, but..." Robert shakes his head slightly, his expression grim. "I... would rather concentrate on something other than my... condition at the moment." By which, he means he'd rather focus on something other than this persistent arousal.

How did Donatello deal with this effectively, anyway?

[i_speak_softly]

Burying himself in work and compartmentalizing, of course.

"That's the fastest way to make yourself sick." Don bends over and runs a hand over Robert's head and down his neck, taking his vital signs in one practiced move. "Have you eaten anything today?"

[herpderpetile]

Oh, so basically the same way Robert deals with things?

Those touches, so innocent in the usual case, seem downright sensual now, and Robert can't help but close his eyes a bit at it. At least turtle skin isn't as sensitive as human skin.

He just shakes his head a little at the question. He hasn't wanted to go anywhere near the kitchen. Because generally Splinter or Michelangelo would be there, and they were both very capable of giving him very irritable and/or intimidating looks. In fact, they most certainly would if he was in their presence for more than a few minutes.

Yes, it's stupid, but this is how Robert deals with things - by running away.

[i_speak_softly]

This is worrying.

Don kneels down, laying his computer on the floor, and taps Robert's knee. "Stay with me, Rob. How do you feel?"

[herpderpetile]

"Lethargic and mildly ill. And ridiculously aroused." Robert shakes his head tiredly, especially at that last part. "... This is all rather overwhelming. It... wasn't so bad at first, but..." It starts wearing on you when you can't do anything about it.

"... The lethargy is strange, though. I have not... done anything particularly exhausting..." Robert hasn't yet figured out that his body is desperately craving water. He's still operating on human logistics for that part.

[i_speak_softly]

(And what.)

Don's two days as a human make him entirely sympathetic to Robert's plight. "I know. It probably won't be too much longer." A squeeze on your knee, and he pushes himself to his feet. "I'll be right back, okay?"

And in a moment he does return, bearing an empty glass and a gallon jug of water. Kneeling again, he pours out the first glassful, and hands it to Robert. "Drink."

[herpderpetile]

Robert looks questioningly at Don at this, but he drinks the first glass of water obediently.

And then discovers how thirsty he actually was when that barely sates his parched throat.

"... ah. I... I haven't been drinking anywhere near enough," he mumbles, with an almost apologetic expression. "I... keep forgetting." Well, even as a human, he wouldn't be drinking enough...

[i_speak_softly]

Don refills the glass and hands it back. "Slowly."

[herpderpetile]

Which Robert does. Or tries to do. No sense making himself more sick trying to drink it all at once.

Eventually, he finishes the second glass. "Definitely dehydrated, I presume... is there any other way to help with this condition, perhaps?"

He can't help but smile just a little bit. Why do you always make him feel so much better, Donatello? You should stop doing that. It'll only make Robert even more fixated on you.

[i_speak_softly]

Don smiles back. "Let me show you something about being a turtle."

Leaving his computer on the floor, where it may or may not be safe from reckless brothers, Don gets up and leads Robert to... the bathroom.

[herpderpetile]

This will end entirely well.

Robert carries his nanocomputer with him, closing it up into its protective case, and follows Don to... wherever they're going.

Oh.

It's the bathroom.

Robert's amazing amounts of emotional failure stop him from even considering this sexually, at first. Mostly he's just confused. "Whatever are we going here for?"

[i_speak_softly]

Don sits on the edge of the tub, pokes the plug into the drain, and turns on the water. "The bathroom, site of that very popular modern convenience, indoor plumbing." He sticks a hand under the water to check the temperature. "And in the absence of better options for swimming, bathing, and soaking, a turtle's best friend."

[herpderpetile]

The idea of soaking seems quite pleasant in this state. And the idea of having Don in the water does too, for an entirely different reason.

Still, Robert just fidgets a bit and looks at Donatello, curious. "Soaking... may you elaborate on the purposes of that?"

As much as it seems like a good idea, it's also a little strange-seeming. And time-wasting-seeming.

[i_speak_softly]

"An efficient method of hydration. Also, it feels good." Don gestures to the rapidly-filling tub. "Do you mind if I join you?"

[herpderpetile]

... Even Robert's terribly emotionally-inept mind can hear the unintentionally suggestive wording in that. But he's determined not to let that monopolize anything.

Though he's blushing a nice shade of subtly-orange-green at the moment.

"Er... c-certainly." Robert waits for the bathtub to be less inconveniently half-filled and then attempts to maneouvre himself into it. This is easier thought about than done, and he ends up smacking his shell off the back of the tub in the process.

At least it doesn't hurt.

"Gah. My apologies..." Robert shakes his head sheepishly, running his three-digit hand over his forehead a little anxiously. The promise of close contact - in water, no less - is awakening a bunch of feelings he'd rather have stayed quiet, and now he just looks like a moron. Or more of one.